I’ve written in several posts up to now that I am 110% over nostalgia culture. By and large, it is looking like I am not alone in this. As dumb as Hollywood thinks the average person is (and I get why they think that), people realize when they are being pandered to. It also doesn’t help when everything under the sun is having a nostalgic pandering sequel or remake or reboot. Part of me was thinking that the worst of that was behind us, because it really seemed to be slowing down. But then I realized that that was just the plague slowing things down. Now, desperate to get people back into theaters, Hollywood has decided that simply pandering to nostalgia isn’t enough. They need to bathe people in it. Drown people in nostalgia the way a woman who does a certain kind of porn gets soaked. Once again, the term was devised by Red Letter Media – a nostalgia bukkake.
I saw this in so many of the reviews of Ghostbusters: Afterlife. People talking about how there was this endless amount of nostalgia pandering that became exhausting after a while because there’s only so much pandering to nostalgia one can do before you realize there’s no substance underneath it.
Another film that did this recently is Spider-Man: No Way Home. Here’s my review of that movie: Do you remember Spider-Man? Do you remember Spider-Man 2? Do you remember The Amazing Spider-Man? Do you remember The Amazing Spider-Man 2? If you loved those movies, then you’ll love this movie too! At least, until you realize that it’s pretty much all endless nostalgia pandering. Just like Ghostbusters: Afterlife, it becomes exhausting after a while.
Then we get to the Groj-awful reboot of the Resident Evil film franchise, with so much stuff from the games that they eschewed having an actual plot in place of trying to cram two games worth of plot into one movie. The reviews were absolutely savage, and the box office numbers were abysmal.
Lastly, we get to the The Matrix: Resurrection. This film literally has the first half slobbering all over the first trilogy and how amazing they were. Just like the other films mentioned here, they don’t just use nostalgia for cheap points, they bathe you in it. They drown you in it. They slobber all over you for how amazing this IP is and how amazing you are for liking it.
What’s the reason for this? Why is Hollywood so desperate to do this? Is it simply because they are out of creative energy? Well, that is always a part of it. Films have simply gotten too big now, and the amount of money a film has to make before being seen as successful is astronomical. Because of it, it’s easier to bank off big franchises. But too many franchises have been absolutely destroyed in recent years. Terminator: Dark Fate had fans begging for the franchise to be led out to pasture. The Predator was so bad that everyone just had a bitter taste in their mouth. But far and away the biggest flushing of fan goodwill down the toilet was with the Star Wars franchise.
The sequel trilogy will be a lesson in film schools for how not to do a franchise when you get the rights to it. Ironically enough, this will be contrasted right beside the MCU, which is especially delicious since both of them were made by the same company. Disney’s failure with the sequel trilogy and how it single-handedly killed one of the most profitable franchises in film history is startling. How nobody ever held Kathleen Kennedy accountable for it is equally baffling.
The film industry is so desperate to pandering now that they are just bathing people in nostalgia for the things they loved, and it is blowing up in their face. The reality is that people are looking for something new. That’s part of the reason why Denis Villeneuve’s Dune has been so well-received. It isn’t some franchise, but rather a film all its own and something that people haven’t seen in a very long time. Taking an old idea and then shining it up in a spectacular way.
One thing that has always gotten me is how Hollywood has never had the idea to take things that people thought were shit long ago and remake them. Plenty of films are made that have a neat premise, but either not enough money to realize the vision or those associated with it don’t have enough talent to see it done right. Red Letter Media’s “Best of the Worst” series comes upon these, and sometimes I remember coming upon films that could be so much better than they actually were. But I understand that this will never happen. Hollywood refuses to gamble on things that aren’t guaranteed to be a sure thing that will make obscene amounts of money.
It has to end. This sort of thing can’t continue forever. If, for no other reason, than because there is only so much stuff that they can be nostalgic about. Nostalgia isn’t an infinite loop. The new Star Wars trilogy is proof of this. Piles of toys that were on clearance racks, even before the movie left theaters. They didn’t hook the new generation the way they did the previous one. So the film industry has to know that at some point, they will have to take some measure of risk. But where does that point come? As intellectual exercises go, I am at a loss as to where this ends. When the people will have had enough of a nostalgia bukkake and will want to move on. I’d love an answer to this little quandary, but it’s one of those things that I can’t foresee.
So much of modern entertainment is just boring. It’s a hose-pipe of content that endlessly pumps stuff out, and I just don’t have the intellectual rigor to force myself into the maw to try and find the stuff that is actually worth watching. I saw this video that TJ did where him and his brother Scotty are trying to find a movie to watch, and TJ just keeps scrolling through stuff and doesn’t pick anything. It’s a biological fact that when you are given too many choices, your brain decides to choose nothing at all. I’m not immune to these forces. As such, I just stick to what I know, because I do not have the energy to sift through the nonsense to find something that is worth my time.
Does this mean that I am going to miss out on things? Absolutely. I’ll never know if The Mandalorian is any good. Heard good things, will never know myself. I heard that Scorcese’s film on Netflix was pretty amazing. Won’t ever see it, odds are. Only streaming service I have is Amazon. If it ever comes there, maybe then I’ll know. Recently bought a movie that I remember from my childhood, and I think it is going to be amazing. Will be doing a Retro Review on it in the near future. I feel lost in this modern world, and no amount of nostalgia pandering will fix that.
Until next time, a quote,
“Might you happen to have a piece of cheese about you now? Might you, boy?”
“Treasure Island?”
“He reads. That’s good. Me too. Not much else to do around here at night, anymore. Many is the night I dream of cheese. Toasted, mostly.” – Rick Deckard, Blade Runner 2049
Peace out,
Maverick