There’s this new supervisor at my job. I kind of love this guy. Unlike my immediate supervisor, who I am almost-certain is not a fan of my hatred of my job and my hatred of our clients, the latter of which I go to NO effort to hide, until I am on the phone. Then there isn’t a single client who doesn’t think I want to help them with their problems. My professionalism is perfect. Flawless. To date, I have gotten people who only hear me on the phone to believe that I love my job and love to help people. Even the biggest assholes who call up just to be cock-suckers, I treat them with the same level of professional courtesy. But once I hang up that phone, there’s a lyric from a song that I have going in my head for virtually every client –
Please end your fucking life. Please end your fucking life. I really have to emphasize, no one cares if you’re alive.
For anyone who wants to call in to child support, if you are one of the nice people, keep in mind that when I think that way, it’s because of the ten assholes who called before you. Don’t take it personally. Unless you are one of the assholes. In which case, see the lyrics I presented previously.
But our new supervisor is a swell guy. He takes my negativity and makes it into a jab at my own expense. I dig it. Though I can tell that he only has so much he can take. He doesn’t understand that I don’t feel joy. At all. Happiness is a fleeting thing in my world because of brain damage. I don’t feel positive emotions the same way he does. But the guy is trying to get it. I’ll give credit where it’s due.
Something about him – he hates Star Wars. Something that annoys the immediate supervisor to no end, since she is in love with it, or a gay coworker who shares my given first name since he is the same. The conversations about this film series really got me to thinking. Here’s the thing – I hated Episode VII and Rogue One. The first was a second-rate remake of the original film, except with a chick, and the other was a boring retelling of a story where we know how it would end before it got started. I see the previews for Episode VIII and I’m like – who cares? Why should I care? It’s just gonna be a remake of Empire Strikes Back. Disney is saying that this film will be different and it will take chances *cough*bullshit!*cough*
I just can’t bring myself to care. Hell, I’m never gonna Netflix it. Why would I? I’m just so done with this franchise. And the people I blame for this are the fans. When Episode VII premiered, I got to watch a YouTube I respected start crying. Fucking crying! Over a movie that is almost entirely ripped off with some fan service thrown in just so they could say “look! This is just like those other movies! You all liked them, right?! Yeah, I did. I still do, at least a little. But this franchise has become a complete clusterfuck, with all the fans singing praises for these new movies. Why? Because the most common argument I hear is – but they’re so much better than the prequels!
Sure, they are. But here’s the thing – the prequel trilogy was a dumpster fire. There are a TON of films better than those. It’s hard to be much worse. Why would I heap on praises for the new films just because they are better than films that are on par with the Transformers sequels? I could say that the original Transformers film is better than the prequels, and that is a true statement. But does that make it a good film? Not really. It’s generic popcorn cinema, but that’s it. Funny, that’s the term I’d use to describe Episode VII – generic popcorn cinema. However, because it’s Star Wars, it’s just amazing! Yeah, look at that retarded lightsaber that Kylo Ren uses! Or hey, look at the this villain who is a petulant man-baby! That sure is neat. Oh, and we have a chick protagonist now! She sure is an interesting character, what with her nullodramatic acting and stoic personality that is as interesting as American cheese. Oh, but there’s the Millenium Falcon! That’s cool, right? What’s that? It’s blatant fan service just to get the nerds to cum in their britches? Okay.
If only the fans were objective about it. Episode VII and Rogue One are average films that are just fine if you are one of those people who can turn your brain off and watch the pretty lights and shit blow up. If you actually want engaging science fiction, they are the last thing. Makes sense with Episode VII. J.J. Abrams can’t direct anything other than popcorn entertainment. But no! They’re masterpieces of cinema! They are ripping off the fucking plot of better movies wholesale! I mean, they’re better than the prequels! That counts for something, right?
Wrong! Not in my eyes. They’re generic, boring, cookie-cutter films. If Disney were intellectually capable of making something that wasn’t a cookie-cutter film, what a wonderful world it would be. But then people might get mad because it doesn’t appeal to the largest audience possible. Say what you will about the original films, at least they knew they were going to appeal to a niche. But since we live in an age where fucking hipsters drown us all in nostalgia praise, everyone has to love this new film because it does the same goddamn thing as the originals do. Because who cares about originality? The millennials have turned their brains off enough as it is.
So yeah, I hate this franchise now, and you can blame the fucking fans. Meanwhile, great ideas like 1313 died because Disney can’t have a project that isn’t kid-friendly. That would hurt their precious fucking image. Groj forbid that people actually want something new and unique.
Until next time, a quote,
“When change does not happen and bread and butter issues tackled – people become cynical and disillusioned.” – Tony Leon
Peace out,
Maverick
Lucien Maverick's Den 