Sarah Palin’s Ego

Okay, so, I have to make a point of this.  I am going to be doing another Opinion article this week that about the wonderfully narcissistic Tea Party media whore, Sarah Palin.  I am doing an opinion article about her because the stuff that is happening with her recently is just too juicy not to talk about.  In case you wonder what I am talking about, take a look at this.  That article is basically showing what most of us already knew.  I am just going to make a point about it here and in the paper because I think that a point needs to be made for the idiots who don’t already know.

So, I am not one of those people who think that the media went overboard in their coverage of Palin during the 2008 Presidential campaign.  For real, I have no sympathy for this woman because of her recent actions.  She screams and bitches about how the media shouldn’t attack somebody’s family, after she had used her family has a prop for the entire campaign.  And then Palin goes and attacks Obama’s family.  So yeah, her nice little hypocrisies are fun to read and to write.  But let’s get down to it. 

So, in case you didn’t know this, right after the incident in Tucson, Palin took down her famously in-poor-taste graphic of the gunsights over Congressional Districts that she wanted to win.  She took it down long before Loughner was identified as the shooter.  She also took down her famous Tweet, “Don’t retreat, instead RELOAD.”  She took these things down before the suspect was arrested.  And I hate to break it to you, but that says something.  It says that Palin thought, even before anybody really knew what was going on, that she might just be culpable.  She might just be partly to blame for what happened.  I want it on the record that I don’t blame her for what happened, I am just making a point.  But that was then.

So after her attempt to hid the evidence failed, she decided to stand up for it.  I find it interesting that if she was just going to defend it, why get rid of it in the first place?  Yeah, gotta love a nice hypocrite.  And her defense of the graphic was incoherant, stupid, and basically her stroking her raging-hard ego boner.  She made two lovely comparisons on a video she released.  The first claimed that she was a victim of a “blood libel.”  An egregious statement that should never be uttered by a such a hardcore dumbass Christian woman like her.  But most of the media missed her second lovely comparison.  She compared herself also to the Muslims in America who have been persecuted after 9/11.  It makes me think of one thing- EGO!

Sarah Palin’s love of herself is truly awesome.  I mean that, I am inspired with awe and wonder.  Her ability to put herself on any pedestal that she pleases whenever the situation calls for it is truly spectacular.  She seems to have little to no empathy whatsoever.  She quit a job that she was elected by this state to do for money.  And all her little stunts after the happened have been humorous, annoying, and often just sad.  In case none of you ever watched her awful show, Sarah Palin’s Alaska, you didn’t see her basically blatant political bullshit that she spewed left and right.  She made in-poor-taste jokes about our national security, making a wall between us and Mexico, and a bunch of other topics.  Not to mention the fact that when she killed a moose (which took about five shots, ironically enough), I felt bad because she was killing an animal that was smarter than she is. 

There was a lovely video on Youtube asking the question that I ask, is Sarah Palin a narcissist?  In my opinion, yes, she is.  She care nothing about really anybody but herself.  She had a grand view of herself that defies reality, she believes that she is entitled to everyone’s adoration, even though she really has done nothing worth respecting, and that list goes on and on.  She really does fit the bill in every way. 

I personally am sick and tired of this woman, but the story gets even better.  So, she was in Reno, NV for a Safari Club meeting.  She talked about a planned media boycott of her, which sounds like a wonderful idea to me.  She made another in-poor-taste joke about this boycott, claiming that now the media won’t be able to blame her for what is happening in Egypt.

Let me take the time now to say how much I loathe this bitch!  She is so rotten, down to her black heart, there is nothing good about this woman in the slightest way!  There can be no good parts of a heart that is so in love with itself that she doesn’t care how heartless her comments sound.  And what pisses me off more is that she can still generate an audience.  Even after she proves that no event is above her exploitation (like 9/11, for instance), and proves that no tragedy is too awful to prove that she is the only victim, she is still sitting front and center and having people believe that she is worthwhile.

I am so glad that Palin’s career is slowly heading into that night.  If recent events have proven anything, it is that Palin is finally losing her edge, and her time in the public eye as anything more than just another demagogue who doesn’t have a fucking clue is finally coming to an end.  Sure, she isn’t going quietly into the night, but she is finally going!  And it is about damn time!  Because I am sick and tired of this evil sociopath poisoning our collective Zeitgeist and making this country look even more stupid and making us all from Alaska look like complete jackasses! 

Get lost from our media, Palin, and take your narcissism with you!

Until next time, a quote,

“When you say to people, ‘don’t retreat, instead reload.’  When that is your political rhetoric, shit like this happens!”  Terroja Kincaid

Peace out,


The Power of the Heart

So, I got to thinking lately, about what it means to be a human being, about what it means to love.  I have been thinking about what it is to exist in a world like the one that we have.  It is a world of so much tragedy, and so much pain.  I have been thinking about what life means as a whole.  It’s not a simple concept, so I think I’ll start this series of blogs with the first part- the heart.  Arguably, the most important.

So, I am feeling a lot of things well up in my heart.  It is going to be very hard for me to do this, so I will do what I can to keep my composure.  I say that this is going to be hard because my heart has been through pains that it didn’t deserve, and it often shouldn’t be.  The sad thing is that for too many people, this is how it is.  So, like I said, I will try and keep my composure, but this is going to be hard.

I read that Valentine’s Day is coming up.  For a long time now, I have regarded that holiday as I do most days- pointless, and self-serving.  It is designed to keep people from feeling alone in life.  It is designed to promote an idea of love that can never really exist.  It is a day that makes those who have love feel very uplifted and like they have been given something that they deserve more than those who do not have it.  Or they believe that they are just luckier.  Or worse still, they think that their lives mean more because they have love.  But to me, and so many others, it is just another day of the years.

The heart is an idea.  The physical organ can often beat faster for certain kinds of love, but it is just an idea.  I’m sure that those who read this realize that, but sometimes people refer to the heart like it is something that feels for itself.  Like everything else in the wonderful power of the human body, it all takes place in the brain.  But what is referred to when people speak of the heart?

Emotion is at the center of it all.  It is a powerful thing.  It is the sole thing that makes life even slightly worth living.  It is the only part of living that really matters.  The sad irony of it all is that for most people, this is a double-edged sword that more often catches them on the not-so-pleasant side of things.  The two things which weigh most heavily on the heart are love and friendship.  Those two things, more than any other, have power over human life.

Let’s start with love.  Love is a concept.  There have been a million and a half explanations of love in science, poetry, philosophy, literature, and every other outlet.  Art has represented it in every single way that is possible.  It is the thing that people spend their whole lives either trying to find, or enjoying in the most amazing way.  I often think to myself that without passion, what would human life really mean?  But what does it mean to life, and to living?

Through my own experiences, I have often found love to be a painful experience.  The more you care about a person, the more that betrayal and anguish hurts.  My cousin Griffin and I used to be the best of friends.  He was the brother that I never had.  He was the sibling that I wish I had.  I had never wanted my sister in my life.  I felt and feel nothing for her, to this day.  Believe that or don’t, that is how it is.  But Griffin, he was my kindred spirit, a person that I loved without equal.  But he betrayed me.  I felt so lost.  I still feel lost.  I still miss him with a sadness that I have never had equal to.  Even after he betrayed me and took so much happiness away from my life, I wish that it didn’t hurt so much.

There was one other who I loved with a clarity of understanding- my Grandmother, Mary.  Mary was a woman who had kindness in her heart that few people can actually understand.  She loved me.  She would never have admitted to it, but I think she cared about me more than other grandkids.  I’m not proud of that, believe me.  It is just how things are.  But she was the person who I thought about when I thought about love.  I still think about it.  I still think about her.  I often wonder if she would be proud of me, of the man that I have become.  I am alone in the world now.  I have felt alone since she left.  I have missed her.  I haven’t ever connected with another human being the way that I connected with her.  I doubt that I ever will.

The irony of it all is that friendship ties into love, because the truth is that you love the persons that you call friends.  If they are truly your friends, friends who are not people that you can pick up and throw away, then you do love them.  Some call that “platonic.”  Me, I call that true friendship.  So, when a friend hurts me, it hurts me more.  I have never wanted to admit it, but I think I feel things deeper than normal people.  I have always been a kid at heart, and I have always felt so much deeper about the things that matter to me than other people.  I’ve had so little genuine happiness throughout the course of my life that I often wonder if I was ever meant to have any at all.

A friend that I had been fighting with wrote me yesterday.  That makes me so happy.  A quote I used in reference to her was used at the eulogy of a funeral that I went to yesterday by somebody else.  He was talking about the person that blog was aobut, the quote was about the friend, the girl, Emily.  I feel friendship deeper than normal people.  She wrote me, and wanted to see me.  She does want to see me.  That fills my heart with a joy beyond compare.  So why is it that I still feel miserable?  I have been thinking about that all day.

The power of the heart is that pursuit of love and friendship is what makes life feel worthwhile.  We all fade away into darkness someday.  We all just disappear into dust in one form or another.  If we trun into worm-food or powder, we still fade away.  So, it is the pursuits of the heart that mean something.  That’s what I think, anyway.  But I am a person who feels.  I am a person who is a romantic.  I am one of the last of a breed.  I believe in taking care of the one that I love, those that I love.  I believe in being there.  But nobody really wants that.  I’ve had so little happiness.  Blame that on me if you like.  Most do.  I have had a lot of happy things, and done a lot of things that I enjoy, but there is a difference between that and real happiness.  Believe me or not, it’s your choice.

Until next time, a quote,

“The love that lasts the longest is the love that is never returned.”  -William Somerset Maugham

Peace out,


The Idea of Hope

So, I went to my uncle Tom’s funeral today.  It was a rather brief ceremony, though I think that that was merely good fortune on my part.  I found that part of my blog was taken and used in the eulogy!  I call intellectual property theft!  I have been robbed!  I joke.  It was actually pretty cool to see somebody want to use my blog in a funeral eulogy for my uncle.  But this whole day has been making me think about a concept that I haven’t had in a long time- hope.

So, after the ceremony, I went out with my cousin.  It is a visit that has been long overdue!  We haven’t gotten to hang out enough in a very long time.  This girl and I used to be thick as thieves.  We still are thick, but we don’t see each other enough to be like thieves.  So today was a really nice thing to have happen.  We got to have some really good conversations and we got to find out some rather interesting things about one-another.  It was both humorous and nice.  It got me to thinking about things.  It also got a little bit better- I got written by my best friend!

So, let me preface this by saying that I had earnestly no idea where things were going to go from here.  We both had some heated exchanges, and one of the most recent had been angry in a whole different way.  But now, she wrote me.  I have been feeling lonely, so I wrote her, and was hoping to find time to hang out.  She writes me back and tells me that we will eventually have time!  I am very pleased by that.  It gives my heart hope for the first time in a long time. 

Things are looking up again.  I still don’t know where things will go with Emily.  There has been a lot of damage done, and I don’t quite know what will need to be done.  Maybe I should just settle back into something comfortable, waiting for later to get into the more personal side of things.  I don’t quite know, but I am going to figure things out. 

I am getting published again!  It is going to be a long road of me getting to write my own opinions of what I want to talk about.  It is going to be a step in the right direction.  Sure, my blog is getting more views, and I am getting my names out there, but I finally get to write for an official paper, and get paid to do it!  That is the first step down a long road that I am beginning to take actual steps down.  Like with Emily, I don’t know where this road ends, but I am working to make my life a little better, and I am actually succeeding!

It seems that Lady Luck is finally deciding to cut me a little slack.  It’s about fucking time!  It is about time for life to finally give me a little bit of a break from the usual endless series of crap that never seems to leave my life.  For the first time in at least a month, I am going in a positive direction.  And as I keep this going, I am gradually noticing something- feeling hope in one’s life is a fantastic feeling!

The idea of hope is something that most everybody can connect with.  It is what keeps people getting up in the morning to go to their mindless jobs.  It is what makes people do the endless series of BS that they think they have to do because they hope that they may just make life a little bit better.  Hope is the idea that makes people try and make their lives better.  Because every single day, life is really hard.  It is only getting better because we try to make it better.  And hope is a catalyst that keeps the flow of things going.

When life is not fair, as it often is, we do what we can to make things better.  But sometimes, the efforts isn’t enough.  There is that campaign called “It Gets Better.”  I hate to break it for you, but for some people, it doesn’t.  that goes beyond the LGBT community and into that world at large.  For too many people, life just plain sucks.  But it is hope that makes things worthwhile. 

Now, I am moving toward my future.  I don’t exactly know what is going to happen.  My academia is continuing to grow.  My life is heading in a positive direction, and I actually have a job at a newspaper again!  Despite what has happened, and what is yet to come, for a time, and I am finally able to believe that I am going to be okay.

Until next time, a quote,

“The only voyage of discovery isn’t seeing new places.  It is seeing with new eyes.”  Marcel Proust

Peace out,


The Role of Good in the Modern World

So, I read today from a friend of mine on Facebook.  She says that even though she knows that people are capable of such good, that they can be such bastards sometimes.  She’s right, but only partially, in my opinion.  There is this other side of it all.  It is a rather unpleasant side that nobody really want to think about for too especially long.  It is the side that shows that all people are just trapped animals, in a system that is rigged, from top to bottom.

You already don’t believe me, I know.  But I have seen for myself how ugly the system really is.  Given my young age, you probably don’t believe that.  But I was shown how it is through the eyes of an older man, who I credit as being my inspiration for my career path- public relations.  He showed me one thing- that people really are just trying to survive.  In their question for survival, people are doing whatever they can.  It isn’t about good and bad with most people.  It is just about them finding a place to exist in the ever-changing world.

Money is such a crucial part of everything that happens in life.  We are all just trying to stay alive in this crazy world that tends to suck people into it, and never let them go.  Let’s face it, love is not what makes the world go ’round.  Love isn’t even close.  Love can’t even begin to measure up to the power that capitalism has over this world.  The guy I mentioned earlier, he pointed out to me once that most love in this world anymore is made and broken on the backs of money.  He laughed that since money is so easy to get for some people, they honestly have no reason for the devotion that love can bring.  I kind of agree with that.

Once upon a time, marriages lasted because women had no real opportunities.  They had no way of earning a living, so they had to find a man and get hitched.  That was just how things were done.  But in the modern world, that isn’t the case anymore.  Women have much more opportunity than they used to.  So the need for marriage isn’t as serious as it used to be.  Our society is having to find a new reason to stay together.  Having kids has been proven not to be a good foundation.  What is the need anymore?  That is one of the many money questions that has come up. 

But I have gotten off-topic.  So, back to the role of good.  I have learned that good is merely one of the many gray areas that exists in the world now.  There is no longer any space for black and white issues.  Truly, there isn’t.  Think about it- we take and take to survive as a species, we use this world and each other to no end, nobody can do anything to stop it.  Let me start with the first point.

I don’t want to come off sounding gloom and doom, because I don’t think things are so bad, yet, but let’s face it, we do strip this world to the bone, and we inevitably will, before we realize that we are a species that is more like a tumor on this planet than anything else.  We all just believe that we need more and more in order for our lives to mean something.  And our acquisition of all this is done by any means necessary.  Think of how many parts of the world suffer for our ability to create in this world.  It is a horribly gray area, and not a particularly fun one to think about. 

The using of other people is rampant in modern society.  Sex is probably the greatest example.  Everybody is so desperate for physical intimacy because it brings the idea that there is some kind of real intimacy behind it.  Deny it all you like, but I personally do believe that on some level, everybody who isn’t a complete sociopath is looking for love.  But we don’t care who we hurt to get there.  I have found out only too well what the effort to find love and friendship can do.  It destroyed so much, and I often wonder if there was ever another way.  And it isn’t just love.  We use people to get ahead in life.  Because the ultimate force in this world is the drive for money, we do whatever must be done to get it.

And let’s face it, nobody will ever be able to stop what has begun.  Nobody will ever be able to make this world a better place because the system is all-powerful.  This whole world has been engineered to keep the smart caged by intelligence and the dumb caged by the powerful.  Only an exceptional few have been able to escape that cage.  Those who try and rebel often find that they stand alone in this maw of greed and corruption.  Those on the bottom do whatever they can to survive.  We have good people doing dirty things to live, and we have those on top admiring their own wealth.

This world is controlled by an idea.  It is controlled by the idea that there is no way out.  Either you are part of the system, or you are living in a commune somewhere.  Or you become Amish.  Either way, the system tells you to do whatever you have to do to survive, no matter who you hurt.  Those who rise above the urge to live the dog-eat-dog life almost never have truly successful lives.  If The Wire taught us nothing else, it is the no matter what part of the system you are in, the game is the same. 

So what is the role of good in the modern world?  Well, ladies and gentlemen, if there were people willing to fight for the right thing, then maybe it actually would have a role.  For now, it has nothing to do with anything.  I think the girl mentioned at the beginning is one day going to end up hating me.  Because I am going to become part of that system.  I am going to be part of the world of corruption, using people’s corruption against each other for my own ends.  I don’t like it, but I just want to live.  Isn’t that what all of us are trying to do?

“I’ve seen this before.  You turn a rape into an assault, a murder into suicide.  Juking the stats.”  -Roland Pryzbylewski

Peace out,


Funerals and Weddings: A Way to Make Life Seem Pointless

So, my uncle’s funeral is tomorrow.  I am going to be attending, even though I actually hate funerals.  It’s a respect thing.  For real, I do.  By the same token as I hate funerals, I hate weddings too.  I hate them both for the exact same reasons.  And those reasons are- because they are boring, they take forever, and they are totally meaningless in certain contexts.  Let me elaborate.

So, I don’t think that anybody will debate me when I say that both of these events are hopelessly boring.  There is a lot of crying.  There is a lot of hand-ringing.  There is a lot of people who I sometimes think are deliberately trying to make themselves feel like crap.  I really do.  At a marriage, they seem to make an example of women who aren’t married.  For real, have you ever noticed how there is that idea that the woman who catches a bouquet is the next to get married?  Yeah, it isn’t nice.  And funerals are the same way.  Everybody is expected to say nothing but kind things about the person.  There is the rule that one should never speak ill of the dead.  I won’t lie, my uncle had some personal issues that weren’t all that nice.  Am I going to bring that up?  No!  But it is the fact that we are supposed to not even think of the bad that makes it all that much more confusing.  Plus, in churches, the music is boring, and the ceremony drags on forever.

Now, who is going to argue with me that these things take forever.  At a wedding, there is a lot of oath-giving.  There is a lot of swearing (not the fun kind with four-letter words and emotion) involved.  There is the preacher-man who is looking on either rather happily or rather sternly (have you ever noticed that it is the guy who gets the ugly look?  Yeah, like a woman has never been unfaithful.  That is sexist!).  And at a funeral, there is also a lot of music.  Everybody stands up and says their peace.  At least that part makes sense to me, the people sharing memories.  Although I would much rather share memories in a much less formal environment.  And there is a lot of talk about where the person goes when they die.  It is not all that pleasant, and it makes those of us who don’t fit the religious category feel like real assholes.  And it takes FOREVER!

So, what am I talking about that they are meaningless in certain contexts?  Well, let’s actually start with funerals for this one.  I am not a religious person.  I don’t believe that there is anything waiting for me on the other side.  I don’t believe that any force in the universe is going to greet me and send me to some boiling dungeon for eternity or take me to some kind of Shangri-la.  Therefore, all the talk of God taking a person into his arms means nothing to me.  And I am certainly not alone.  Some people just don’t want to hear it.  If it wasn’t for the fact that this guy is family, I actually wouldn’t be going.  I have made a point to avoid funerals for people that I am not related to.  It is a meaningless waste of time for the living.  And weddings?  Same problem.  You are swearing before God that you are going to be faithful and together forever.  You are swearing that you are going to stay by one-another sides for eternity!  But if you don’t believe in that crap, then what does it mean?  It is totally meaningless.

Now, when I die, I am putting it in my will that I don’t want a funeral.  I want an Irish wake.  For those of you who don’t know, an Irish wake is when you have the body on display at a massive party, which is supposed to last a week.  Now, I want to be cremated, so I want my urn on display, and for everybody to have a party for the full week.  Of course, traditionally this would happen before the funeral.  But for me, I want that to be it.  Then, I want my ashes spread at a predetermined location.  That is the way that I want my life to end.  And the reason is because the rest of that stuff is really dull!  And I hate dull!

As for marriage, well, since I don’t want a family (because I hate kids with a passion), the tax benefits of marriage don’t mean much.  And since I could give a damn about what religious figures of superstition think, that means even less.  Besides, have you ever seen how much money people throw into that bullshit?  I can’t understand why a person would possibly want to have that kind of thing hanging over their shoulders.  Especially when they probably already have financial issues that they are dealing with already.  It just seems pointless to me.

Now, there are those who say that a funeral is for the living.  Well, guess what, I think that the deceased should have a say.  Would you really demean my memory by saying that I should have some kind of religious ceremony, even when I don’t believe in God?  Does that seem fair to me?  Does it seem fair to you?  I didn’t think so.

Until next time, a quote,

“A wedding is like a funeral, but with musicians.”  -anonymous

Peace out,


The News Network With No Code

So, I am currently in a Media Ethics class.  It is a very interesting class.  The teacher is hopelessly opinionated and is not objective in the slightest.  She says that there are no wrong answers in this class, but when she doesn’t agree with you, she makes a point of making an example of you.  I have been made example of several times.  It is kind of annoying, but I personally like the class.  But this class brought forth a concept that I had heard about, but never knew the particulars.  I am talking of course about the unofficial media code of ethics.  For real, she says that most newsrooms have these in them!  Be as cynical as you want, but these rules actually make a lot of sense.

The first rule is to seek the truth and report it.  That may sound pretty simple, but it is actually a lot more complicated than it sounds.  As a news reporter, you have a job to look past what is on the surface.  You have an obligation to get as much information as possible and to make sense of it all.  I like the point that Keith Olbermann made about this concept- that it is all subjective, but you still have an obligation to try your best to figure out the truth.

The second rule is to minimize harm.  That is actually a bit more complicated.  I don’t know if you ever saw that picture in The New York Times had of a man who jumped from on of the Twin Towers on 9/11.  He was one of many who jumped.  The picture circulated all over the country.  As you can probably imagine, it created a lot of outcry.  A lot of people were royally pissed off and they didn’t want the picture in the papers.  And ever since then, there has been a lot of effort to get that picture erased from the record of what happened that day.  So, the second code of ethics is to minimize harm.  Personally, I am in support of that photo.  It was important.  It showed how things actually were that day.  But it means something to not purposely try and hurt somebody.

The third rule is to act independently.  That is a little bit more complicated than the others.  This basically means that you shouldn’t be part of the world of bribes, meetings, conflicts of interest, and keeping yourself from looking like you are on somebody’s payroll.  You are supposed to do what it takes to get the story without being another bribed PR guy for whoever you are writing about.  The teacher of my Media Ethics class makes point that she never accepts dinner offers from people who she is interviewing.  She never accepts gear from BP when she goes up to the north slope to report.  Basically, it means standing alone.  It means being your own person.

The final rule is to be accountable.  This rule matters more than any other, in my opinion.  This rule means that when you makes a mistake, when you fuck up a story, that means that you are supposed to be held accountable to those who read or listen or watch you.  When you make a mistake, you are supposed to lose viewers or readers or listeners because people don’t trust you anymore.  It means that you are supposed to own up to your own mistakes.  You are supposed to be held accountable to the people you are supposed to owe your allegiance to- the public.

And it is with these rules that I come to the one network that has risen above all these rules, and has suffered none of them.  Their lack of ethics means nothing at all and what’s worse is that they have grown truly huge because of it.  I am, of course, talking about Fox News.  A network that seems to not fear the rules of ethics in any way.  It amazes and depresses me so much.  Need examples?  Well, let’s go by the rules, one by one.

So, do they seek the truth and report it?  Let’s examine the great clusterfuck report that Obama was taking a huge flotilla of warships and that the trip was going to cost tens to hundreds of millions of dollars a day.  Hannity, Kelly, Fox and Friends, and so many others all preached this line, and when it was proven to be bullshit- they denied saying it.  I personally love when Bill Maher had Bill O’Reilly on his show and asked him if people said this and when O’Reilly denied it, Maher presented all the evidence, and O’Reilly tried to get himself removed from being compared with them.  Yeah, very accountable.  Assholes.

So, the second rule- minimizing harm.  Have they ever minimized harm?  Well, let’s look at the case Shirley Sherrod.  Remember that?  The woman who was accused of being racist?  She was forced to retire form the USDA.  There was a video that was used against her that was used completely out of context and when they broke her job apart, did Fox apologize?  Gee, I don’t seem to remember.  Or remember the nomination of Sonia Sotomajor?  I love all their little talks about how that woman was a “reverse-racist.”  They trash people’s reputations left and right.  It has real negative effects.  And they never seem to care about that.  They just keep going, and find a new target to attack.  Their attacks on Obama are so unbelievably racist and pathetic.  Watch Glenn Beck (this crazy-ass idiot who is a step or two removed from playing with his own shit) and you’ll see what I mean.

And the final rule- being accountable.  Are they accountable?  No!  And you know the reason why?  The reason is because their audience doesn’t honestly give a shit.  For real.  They know that their audience isn’t going to question their fictional reality.  In their world, we are a socialist republic which is just like Nazi Germany (catch how they demonized a Democrat for comparing Republicans to Nazis?  Gotta love a good hypocrit), and we are all about to die because Jesus is about come back and kick the shit out of all of us.  They are accountable to no-one.  When their story is proven to be bullshit, it is rare that they ever make anything of it.  And when they do, the keep it as brief as possible. 

It’s no wonder that the media is looked at so cynically anymore.  It’s no wonder that people just tune out.  Because one side paints a doom-and-gloom world that is about to be destroyed by their imaginary friend (Reagan or Jesus, I don’t quite know which).  The news is supposed to be something more.  Rupert Murdoch capitalized on an idea.  It is all so pathetic.  And I am not going into the media aspect because it is all a lie.  Fox News, the ultimate joke.

Until next time, a quote,

“I pulled the segment.  Would Fox have?  Would CNN have?”  -Keith Olbermann

Peace out,


In Memory of Tom

So, for those of you who don’t know, my uncle Tom just died.  Tom was a guy who was understood by few, had a bad temper, and had a soft side that he let show, even though I personally think he was a little ashamed of it.  He was a good man, even though he had some personality quirks.  I write this in testament to him.

Tom died of a heart attack in Hawaii.  It was a place that he had wanted to be for a long time.  It is that fact which I like more than anything else.  Tom got to die in a place that he wanted to be, doing what he wanted to do.  How many of us, you think, are going to get that kind of luxury?  How many of us are going to be in that perfect place when we die?  I doubt that many are.  When I heard that my uncle had died, I was neither shocked nor very saddened.  In fact, I look on his death with a kind of peaceful acceptance.  You see, I can see things before they happen.  Nobody believes that I can, but I can.  I can see things before they happen and I knew that this was going to be how Tom’s life ended.  I knew this, and I felt that he could at long last find peace.

Since he is Dave’s (my father’s) brother, he did not grow up in the most stable or peaceful of households.  His old man was an abusive son of a bitch who mistreated his kids, and his wife.  Mary (my grandmother, and arguably the most important person who has ever been in my life) was the most kind mother that she could ever be.  She tried her very best for the kids, and they all have been getting along in life.  Sure, they all have their internal squabbles, but I truly don’t believe that there is such a thing as a well-adjusted family.  Every Christmas, when they were in Mary’s house, all the fights went away.  She didn’t get mad much, but when my Grandmother did, you backed off!

I remember hanging out with Tom.  You see, my aunt Joan and her family moved into Mary’s place before she passed away.  They lived with her and it was a pretty peaceful existence.  I miss so much the days when I used to go to Mary’s and just sit on her deck in the summer, talking to her.  I miss that woman so much.  My grandmother meant more to me than most anybody.  She was my most loyal friend, a confidant, a person who I miss more than anything else.  Tom was a real “momma’s boy.”  I don’t think that Mary minded.  She loved having her family around.  Despite how they all grew up, there was a practice in the Johnson household that no family member was just cut off.  The family would be there for them, forever.

However, Tom’s relationship with the rest of the family had gotten pretty ugly in the days before his death.  His son, Griffin, sued me for a lot of money.  The rest of the family was appalled and angered by this.  Myself among them.  We all were screaming insults at Griffin.  But right to the bitter end, Tom stood by him.  He blamed everything on the boy’s serpent mother, Patty.  Right until the end, Tom could not be swayed.  It caused a lot of friction with the family.  He was the only one among us who stood by Griffin, and relationships suffered for that devotion.  But he was still loved.

Tom did not have a particularly happy life.  That is why I am happy to find out that at least he got to be in a place that he wanted to be when he died.  He got to be where he wanted to be, and he got to have the kind of life that he wanted to have at the end.  He got to be in the tropical paradise that he wanted to be in when his end came.  I think I’ll choose to believe that he was a happy man.

The memorial is this Saturday.  I think I may be wrong, but it makes sense that it would be at Sunny Knik Chapel.  Tom had been there many time.  It makes sense to put the memory of him to rest there.  For me, I am thinking about where I am.  I was told recently to let the friendship of somebody who hurt me go.  But a different friend told me that the pain that was caused from me caring so much is not a bad thing.  In fact, it makes all the difference.  A lot of yelling happened, and a lot of people got angry.  Only now do I realize that she is not a bad person.  And neither am I.  All friends have fights.  What matters is that you apologize, and make up.  I think I am going to take that step.  It takes a lot more balls to admit that you did wrong in a relationship than to just blame the other person.  I am going to take that step.  I am going to make that leap of faith.

Because Tom was a good friend.  I remember when he and I used to chill at Grandma’s.  He, Griffin, and me used to chill out and make jokes.  We used to have a lot of fun with that.  I remember that good friendship sometimes has it’s ups and down.  Thank you, Tom.  I am getting butterflies.  I am scared, thinking about what I will have to say to Emily.  But she is my best friend.  I don’t know what tomorrow holds.  All I know is that I have to make this leap of faith.  It’s time for the anger to go away.  It’s time for responsiblity to be taken.  And most of all, it’s time for me to realize that it all means nothing.  I want that good life too.

Rest in peace, Tom.  I think you’ve earned it.

Until next time, a quote,

“Friendship is a promise.  A promise that you will stand by each other.  Through the good times, and the bad.  To walk with one-another down life’s path.  That’s what friendship is.”  -Lucien Maverick

Peace out,


State of the Union Address: The Aftermath

So, let me begin this by saying that I voted for Obama.  I will admit that I voted for Hillary in the primaries, but that is a different story.  When his presidency began, I had a lot of hope for this man.  I thought that there would finally be a voice of reason among all the madness.  I will give the man credit.  He did make a lot of really good points.  So let’s get down to it.

I’ll make my statements beginning chronologically, and then I will have my statement at the end.  Let’s begin by his testimony about Giffords not being in attendance.  He didn’t bring up gun legislation.  That was his first major fail.  I personally don’t think that there is even a debate about this anymore.  I know that Bill Maher made a similar statement, but this is my own opinion.  Nobody will talk about making the legislation for guns tighter.  Now don’t get me wrong- I’m not one of those guys who wants everybody’s gun to be taken away.  I just think that the background checks should be a little more thorough, and guns shouldn’t be sold to people who are crazy.  I don’t think that’s asking too much, do you?

So, very quickly, Obama moved on to the economy.  Now, he had a lot of really good ideas.  I won’t deny that I am actually with him on a few of the points that he made.  I love the point he made about how science should be worked on in this country.  The fact that China is ahead of us in solar power has always perplexed me.  His idea to expand scientific research was actually something that I would endorse.

His next idea was to fix what has gone wrong with the education system in this country.  I keep it no secret that I abhor what has happened to this country’s education system.  “No Child Left Behind” was a disaster.  It was a gigantic waste of both money and time that Bush never really had to pay for.  He never got any bad rap for that.  In fact, it has been rather absent from modern discussion.  I am glad to see that it is back in the public eye.  I will give Obama some major props, he was right. 

Then came up a subject that I am personally SO happy to talk about- infrastructure!  This nation’s infrastructure sucks!  It royally sucks, and I am so glad that it is finally at least being talked about!  The roads, the railways, the hospitals, the fire stations, the schools, all of these things are in complete disarray and it is time that somebody did something to fix them!  We should have a high-speed rail system in this country.  We should have some green technology fueling our vehicles.  The bones of the dead aren’t going to be around forever.  We should have the rest of the world trying to catch up to us, not the other way around!  I do kind of like how Obama pointed that out in his speech.

Then he came to the topic of the cuts that would have to be made.  I am so glad that he talked about cutting defense spending!  That is one of the single-largest drains on this country’s economy.  And I love to death the fact that he talked about the fact that this country’s bureaucracy is a total fucking mess!  He even threw in a very lovely joke about how the Department of the Interior handles salmon issues in fresh water, and the Department of Commerce handles them with they are in salt water.  This country’s backwards way of doing things is hampering things.  And of course, he talked about other cuts.  He made sure not to bring Medicare into it.  That’s smart.  If he had said that he wanted to make cuts to Medicare, that would officially end his chances of re-election in 2012.

This whole speech was well-orchestrated.  Obama knew what he was going to say well.  Like almost all of his public speaking gigs, he spoke with eloquence and was very good with his diction.  But alas, the simple fact is that we have heard this kind of thing before.  I cannot count the number of times that Obama has promised one thing, and delivered another.  I said at the beginning that I voted for Obama.  I did.  But the truth is that I have ended up regretting that decison.  I have ended up regretting that choice when Obama keeled over on his promises and basically decided to just piss-away any of his merits with the true liberals for the sake of “bi-partisanship.”

There were rumors of there being a drinking game at some bars that when Obama would say the term “bi-partisan,” everybody would take a shot.  Ironically enough, a lot of people probably went home not so drunk tonight.  I guess that is saying something.  It was a very nice speech to hear.  But, like so much of what politicians say, it was all just a lot of hot air.  What comes next is seeing if the man will actually live up to what he says.  He had a lot of good ideas.  But then again, he did when he got elected too.

Until next time, a quote,

“The Department of Interior controls salmon when they are in fresh water.  The Department of Commerce controls them when they are in salt water.  And I hear that it gets even more complicated when they’re smoked!”  -Barack Obama

Peace out,


Preconceptions About College

So, you see it in movies and on television every single day- the world of college.  In these wonderfully horny pieces of fiction, it is portrayed as a world partying and booze, where sex just falls out of the sky and into the laps of all the wonderfully beautiful people.  For real, have you ever noticed that almost all the people in those movies are REALLY freakin’ attractive?  Pity that real life cannot match the gorgeous fiction picture that they paint, eh?

Well, the picture goes that college has nothing to do with education.  I hate to break it to you, ladies and gentlmen, but the fact is that college has EVERYTHING to do with education.  I don’t know if you have figured this out yet, but a high school diploma is no longer enough for a young-adult to succeed in life.  The statistics are overwhelmingly negative in this regard.  The simple fact is that America has such a low turn-out of successful high school graduates, and the drop-out rate of college is even less attractive.  It is just an ugly reality that people refuse to face.  It is an ugly reality that the world has to face.

Then there is the misconception that colleges are all about sex.  I fully realize that there are party-schools, like the Arizona State University.  There are those which are only there for football.  Basically being barely a step above a community college.  But almost all universities which are actually serious institutions are a hell of a lot more serious than that.  Some actually have very strict guidelines on kids getting nasty on campus.  It is just a massively over-sold line to future college students that if they go into the college that they are going to get laid left and right.  The simple fact is that college is the same as everywhere else.  Finding love is hard.  Finding sex, depending on how attractive you are, can be even harder.  Some people have no luck at all (like me).  That’s just how it goes. 

I have no idea why the media is so desperate to sell college with such a high expectation of instant gratification.  That’s what it’s all about.  There is this girl who lives here at the dorms down the hall for whom love means nothing.  She is so attractive that getting sex is a non-issue.  She could care less about the romantic ideas of it all.  In fact, she is not above fucking whatever stupid piece of meat she finds.  She also loves getting drunk with such a passion.  I personally find that kind of depressing.  How such students are able to succeed in life actually does confuse and astonish me.  There is this other girl that I know who thinks that drinking, or rather the drunken binge, is a worthwhile pursuit for one’s life.

Now, I’m not going to become somebody’s mother and say that drinking is wrong.  My old man does that enough at home.  But I hate to break it to you- the booze is only a smokescreen.  The thing about instant gratification is that it has to wear off.  Eventually, you have to wake up and realize that your problems are still there and that they aren’t going anywhere.  It’s the same reason that adults drink.  The only thing which is different is that it is considered not only acceptable in college, but a basic necessity.

And onto the subject of abject fucking in college.  Can somebody please explain to me what the wonderful thing about just doing it with somebody that you could give a damn about is?  Can you please explain to me what is so damn wonderful about feeling nothing toward the person who you are jumping into bed with is?  Really, I want to know.  I want to know what comes out of treating something which is actually a very emotional and physical concept like a completely visceral experience that means nothing.  The portrayal of college in movies as being the ultimate sex-game depresses the fuck out of me. 

The simple truth is that college is about learning.  It is about preparing yourself for a life beyond it.  To go out into the world and have at least some idea what you are getting yourself into.  And believe it or not, ladies and gentlemen, but that actually helps!  It is actually a good thing to know what the hell you are doing!  To know what a person is getting themselves into in their future is actually a really good thing.  And you will appreciate it when you get out into the world of careers, and you discover that it is a dog-eat-dog nightmare that turns a great deal of really good people into real jerks. 

See, the instant gratification doesn’t matter.  None of that bullshit matters.  And that is all that it is- bullshit.  It is pointless drivel.  A lot of students have learned, only too-late, that the party tends to consume you, and most college drop-outs are those who didn’t heed the warnings.  Now look, I’m not against a person hanging out and having a few drinks with their friends.  But the instant gratification lifestyle tends to just turn a person into somebody who wants and ends up needing it more and more.  Remember the aforementioned girl who cared nothing about the people she was fucking?  I have a standing bet that she drops out either this year or next.  Her academia is shriveled into nothing.  What must life mean, to a girl so beautiful, and in my opinion, so miserable.

Until next time, a quote,

“I don’t want to even think about how many brain cells I lost winning that shirt.”  -nameless girl, Law and Order: SVU

Peace out,


Lucien’s Review: the Twilight Series (Cont.)

Okay, I have to say a few more things about the Twilight series of movies.  I have to say these things because they freakin’ bug me!  I have to say them because I earnestly believe that this series is dangerous to our modern youth!

The first is that this whole series is a gigantic metaphor for no sex before marriage.  Now, I earnestly don’t give a shit if you believe that BS about abstinence.  The fact is that it has been proven, time and time again to be nothing but crap that the uber-religious spew to support their ideal of a pure way of being.  They think that if they only teach their kids no sex before marriage that they will not do it.  So, why not create a movie about it?  I personally put this on Stephanie Meyer.  The books series was no better.  They were an even more vivid metaphor for no sex before marriage.  I love how Edward make a big point about it in the second movie when Bella wants to get nasty with him.  He sounds so high and mighty.  It was such bullshit.

So, another point I have to just rag on more is the fact that in the book series and the films…Bella has no spine!  She is a completely weak and pathetically innocent character who basically will tolerate any of her boyfriends’ (Yes, the apostrophe is outside of the word, because truthfully, neither of those guys is innocent) psychotic behaviors.  Edward says to Bella that he has been watching her sleep for months, and she is totally cool with that!  He tells her that he has killed people, and she is totally cool with that!  He tells her that he wanted to kill her and she is totally cool with that!  Please join me in saying…what the fuck!  Then there is Jacob.  He is part of a group of more animal than man killers who hunt down vampires.  They say that it is in the interest of protecting the normal people, but watch the second film and tell me that they don’t look like the are enjoying themselves!  It is ethnic cleansing, and it is being endorsed by Bella herself. 

This girl is not believable in any way.  But what frightens me most about all of this is the fact that this film has been well-received by critics.  One teacher that I had said that it has “redefined the ‘chick-flick.'”  This kind of adoration is both creepy, and pathetic.  It is all explained in the first movie what appeals to the teenage girl crowd.  Bella gets into a new town, and instantly she is popular and loved (something that would never happen to the new girl in real life).  Every guy wants to be with her.  Every girl wants to be friends with her.  And life is just so great.  Add to that the fact that she meets the man who she loves instantly, and it is guaranteed to be eternal love.  That just seals the deal.

I’d like to take your attention to the film I mentioned in the last blog about this.  It is called Let the Right One In.  It is a Swedish film which takes the concept of teenage vampire romance, and makes it a tad more realistic.  The characters are dynamic.  The love between vampire and human is much more complicated and often violent, due to the female vampire’s need for blood.  The boy human character is just trying to be in love with this young woman, and all he seems to ever get for his trouble is pain.  It is the way things would really be, in my opinion.  For real, think about it!  If you loved a vampire, what kind of life could you honestly have to look foward to?  It would be violent, it would be miserable.  It couldn’t end well, because of the simple fact that these creatures need blood to live.

Let’s face it, people.  The simple fact is that people like the Twilight series because it has a pretty guy who sparkles in sunlight (that is such a metaphor for him being gay…for women.  Seriously, he is so very gay…for women).  They just want to believe that the stalker blood-sucker is going to give them a wonderful romance that will last forever.  That isn’t real, girls.  Grow up and get a brain!

Until next time, a quote,

“Why, when we are presented with some of quality and artistic integrity, we shun that for something that is mediocre and hackeneyed?”  -TJ Kincaid

Peace out,