The Immaturity of Gamers, Part III

This is getting old.  It really, really is.  It’s getting to the point that I’m starting to feel ashamed for this hobby, because the people who are involved with it, these terminally-online men, are making it look TERRIBLE.  It has come such a long way from the days when people thought that gaming was just a distraction and would never compete with heavy-hitters like film.  Now, gaming is kicking Hollywood’s ass!  It should be seen as an art form, on the same level as film, but it isn’t.  And part of the reason why it isn’t is shit like the images that I’m going to show you, grabbed from Twitter’s sad corpse that is basically a mecca of morons who can’t keep their perv side in check.

Exhibit A –

The “woke chin”?  REALLY?!  Has this man or any of his dim-witted followers EVER seen an actual woman before?  For real, have they seen a single woman in real life outside of porn, anime, or vidya?  There is no greater indictment of the inability of men to connect with women in a non-sexual way than to say that Joanna Dark’s chin is too “woke”.  This is insane.  I’m sorry that none of these men have ever seen a real woman before.  It must be very difficult.

Never before have I understood the utility of the phrase “touch grass,” but holy fuck!  Get outside and talk to people!  Meet actual human beings and realize that the world is not porn!  Volunteer with a non-profit or help with some community event.  There are ways to get to know actual women that don’t involve being on your computer.  Not that any of the guys who feel this way would do that.  I guarantee that real women wouldn’t live up to the fantasy of a woman that they have in their head.  They would prefer their fantasy woman because that woman won’t have any expectations of them and they don’t have to change in any way to make the relationship work.

People who think this way have a VERY specific idea for what a woman should be like.  Anything that deviates from it is incorrect.  Especially in their video games.  I can already hear the refrain from these sad incels – “video games are about fantasy!  Why shouldn’t we want women that look like supermodels!?”  You can want whatever you want, I guess.  But gaming companies are under ZERO obligation to cater to you.  In case you might have noticed, you all aren’t young people anymore.  There is a new generation that is coming in, and they have different sensibilities then you.  I’m sorry that you all aren’t aware enough to understand that.  It must be very difficult for you.

Which brings us to Exhibit B –

Wooooow.  Can men just control their horniness for five goddamn seconds?!  Is that REALLY asking too much?  First off, flat?!  You see those C cup boobies, sad horny man?!  I do.  I see them clear as day.  And of course, the “man jaw.”  I expect this shit from Grummz.  He is one of the saddest gaming incels I’ve ever seen.  This guy has been parading around his outdated horny attitude for years.  I remember a time when I used to agree with some of his takes, but then I realized that he is just another sad conservative who bitches about video games not being exactly what he wants.

I swear, I’m just so DONE with these people.  You want Lara Croft to have G cup boobs?  You want her to have the Stellar Blade chick’s ass with the associated jiggle physics?  Well, there are DOZENS of places online where you can get porn of exactly that.  If you can’t handle a woman who isn’t spank bank material in a game, then maybe this isn’t the game for you.  Hell, maybe gaming isn’t for you!  Maybe you and your two-pump chump dick (looking at you, Grummz) should find another hobby.  Watching porn seems right up your alley.  God knows, you complain when every woman in every game isn’t enough of a porn star for you.

To say nothing of the fact that they could just as easily make the kind of game they want to play.  That’s right, they could make a game where all the female characters are sex objects whose personality directly correlates with their cup size.  With all the tools available to them, they could make whatever kind of game they want to make.  Make their sex toy version of Lara Croft who is just a pair of breasts that talk.  That’s so OBVIOUSLY what they want.  Make her look like the chick from Stellar Blade and even have a secret nude mod, or just give out the modding tools right from the jump so all the guys on PC can make her nude.  That’s all that you people care about, so go for it.

I remember giving out this advice when it was the social justice types who were bitching about women in games, and now I’m giving it to their antithesis now – if you want games with a certain kind of character, then put your money where your mouth is and make it.  There is NOTHING stopping you from learning and putting that to use.  The Indie market is hotter than it has ever been now.  So go for it.

In the meantime, would you PLEASE shut the fuck up about how “woke” or “man jaw” a female character is?!  Is that asking too goddamn much?

Until next time, a quote,

“I says to him ‘next time you have a thought, just let it go.'” – Ron White

Peace out,

Maverick

Sweet Baby Inc. is GamerGate 2.0?

Man, 2014 seems like a lifetime ago.  Life for me was very different at that time.  It was my last year at college, and a rough one at that.  Things were hard for me, and I was nearing the end of what I call the “nice guy phase” of my life.  It was a few years past that that I grew up and realized that I wasn’t as nice as I thought, and became a better person because of it.

I remember when the Internet Aristocrat’s video about Quinnspiracy dropped, and how it was a fascinating series about the interconnected web of games journalists sleeping with people they wrote about, sleeping with people in their industry, and the connections they used and abused.  In hindsight, GamerGate wasn’t nearly the dragon-slaying that we thought it was.  It was just exposing the corrupt the journalism industry was.  But it was a hell of a time to be online.

Ever since then, gaming journalism was real salty about it, and tried to keep it going.  But after about six or seven years, even they couldn’t keep the old boogeyman going, so it quietly passed away.  It was one of those online things that only happens once in a generation.  An online movement that got big enough for the normies to take notice.  Things like that don’t happen much.  However, it seems that the anti-woke crowd kind of missed it, so they decided to get their dander up about something that is utterly meaningless.

See, there’s this consulting firm called Sweet Baby Inc, and boy howdy, do the anti-woke crowd hate their guts.  Why?  Because they are working to foster more diversity in video games, which the anti-woke crowd has been boo-hooing about for about as long as it has been since GamerGate.  And this group has been consulted with, just consulted with (at no point did they actually get involved in the actual development process), on several high-profile games.  The first is Marvel’s Spider-Man 2, a phenomenal game that has “woke” elements that work splendidly, and was a huge hit.  Then there is Alan Wake II, which was not only a commercial hit, but also was nominated for game of the year by a bunch of different outlets.  Then there is God of War: Ragnarok, a game that not only was a blockbuster of sales, but all the coverage of it was universally positive (outside of pretentious douchebags like David Jaffe who think it didn’t innovate enough), and also a solid contender for Game of the Year in the year it came out, losing pretty narrowly to Elden Ring.  That was a VERY good year for gaming.

But then there was them being consulted for Suicide Squad, which wasn’t killed because of being “woke”.  It was was killed because it’s a shitty live service game, in a vast sea of shitty live service games.  To say nothing of how they treated Kevin Conroy’s last appearance as Batman.  But don’t tell the people desperate to make Sweet Baby Inc the focal point of GamerGate 2.0.

But Lucien, they were consulted for the Saint’s Row reboot!  What about that?!

Everyone and their dog loves to talk about how that game is the quintessential “get woke, go broke” game, but that’s just not true.  If that game had been better written and had gameplay that wasn’t a bug-ridden mess, it wouldn’t have been the disaster that it was.  That game was a tire fire from the word go, and wokeness isn’t the sole cause for that.  The gameplay and glitches alone would have killed it.  The shitty writing and poorly made “woke” character were just the icing on the cake.  Plenty of games have shown that if you make a game with well-written characters, a good story, and good gameplay, it won’t matter if it’s “woke”.  It will still be successful.

Case and point – Spider-Man: Across the Spiderverse.  That film is a masterclass in a “woke” film done right.  It was a good movie first, woke second.  Gaming is learning the same lesson.  It had some cringe-y “woke” stuff, but now it is learning how to integrate it in creative ways.  And that’s good!  What the anti-woke crowd who is wanting to recapture the energy that the original GamerGate had.  Except it isn’t working.  Already the fire behind this is gone, being kindled by the sad people who desperately want to believe it is a thing.

Here’s something these people just don’t understand – the world is made up of all kinds of people.  And there’s NOTHING WRONG with them wanting representation in gaming.  Sure, it needs to make sense, but like I said, we are seeing how it can be positively integrated.  I’m so sorry that games are made that have women, and black people, and the LGBT.  But they are a part of this world too.  If that bothers you so much, then you have two choices.  Either you can play something else (there are over 14,000 games that come out in a given year between Steam and the various consoles), or you can make your own games.  You can put your money where your mouth is and make the games you want to see.  If they are good, they will sell well.  If they are crap, they will sell poorly.

The short answer of the question above is – no.  GamerGate 2.0 isn’t happening.  What happened in 2014 was a once-in-a-generation sort of online movement that doesn’t get seen all that much.  Lightning in a bottle.  It was a crazy fun ride, at the time, but that was then.  Now, it’s all just past tense.  And some consulting firm who has no actual power in this industry isn’t going to ruin that.  I’m sorry for people who believe it is.  You all need to get a life.  Touch grass.

Until next time, a quote,

“This is a once-in-a-generation HOLY SHIT idea!  And the water beneath the Golden Gate Bridge is freezing cold!  Look at my face, and tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about.” – Sean Parker, The Social Network

Peace out,

Maverick

F*ck Bill Maher, Part Deux

It kills me how many people who I used to respect are turning into complete conservative boomers in their old age.  Richard Dawkins has turned his entire online presence into bitching about trans people.  Bet him and JK Rowling are fans.  Speaking of her, she is now saying that the Nazis didn’t kill any people for being trans.  I swear, we’re a few unhinged rants of hers away from her saying that Hitler did nothing wrong for killing trans people.  I bet she actually believes that, given her visceral hatred for the trans community.  Seem likes every time I hear about someone that I really respected or looked up to who is still kicking today and has gotten older, the more I don’t like them.

Which brings us to Bill Maher.  Man, I used to think this guy was an amazing comedian.  I had two of his specials on DVD, and would watch them often.  His documentary Religulous was on my top 10 list that I have been making, but stopped at, because I was having some internal disagreement.  Especially now.  But as the years have gone on, he has become more and more of a curmudgeon.  A rich bourgeoisie prick who is one of the people he used to make fun of.  He’s like the living stereotype that people have about Democrats that they are Hollywood liberals that are out of touch with the average America.  Bill Maher is the living embodiment of that!  I’m just waiting for his video on PragerU of “Why I Left the Left,” that so many of these hucksters turned conservative prude have done.  Him, John Fetterman, and Tulsi Gabbard.  All three should make one.  I’m sure they will, at some point.

On his HBO series, he recently did a New Rules segment where he basically shit on people who have what he believes to be fake PTSD.  What does he think actual PTSD is?  Well, it’s soldiers, of course!  Only soldiers have itl  That’s right, only soldiers who have fought in Iraq have this issue.  Wow!  Thanks, Bill Maher!  I’m so glad that you have set me straight on this!  It’s only an affliction for soldiers.

That guy who was the teacher who survived the shooting in Uvalde, with all of his students dead, and he only survived by playing dead, and now is wracked with survivor’s guilt?  Yeah, he doesn’t have it.  The guy who proposed to his girlfriend, and the cliff they were standing next to suddenly gave way, causing her to fall into the abyss and die?  Yeah, he doesn’t have it.  Proud of that girl who got her arm bitten off by a shark and who has been able to take up surfing again.  That’s conquering some PTSD, tell you what.

Or there is a dear friend of mine.  She is engaged to a woman who, along with her sister, was the victims of repeated sexual assault by a family member.  She CANNOT go to sleep at night unless she makes certain the bedroom door is locked.  If something happens and they have to get up at night, she can’t get back to sleep unless they make sure it is locked again.  She has woken up to fits of night terrors. where she has to be calmed down.  But hey, she didn’t fight in Iraq, so Bill Maher doesn’t think she has PTSD.  She should just pull herself up by her bootstraps, amirite, you conservative prick?!

And of course, Bill Maher refuses to go anywhere near where young people are to do comedy shows anymore, because he knows that he would be booed off-stage.  Rightly, from where I’m sitting.  This is the kind of stuff he is joking about now.  Belittling the victims of actual crimes, and shitting on their needs, all because they don’t fit the narrow criteria of what he believes is actually PTSD.  Fuck this clown.

I had COVID, which caused me some hardcore heart issues.  Now, I am constantly worrying about my health.  Have gone to some crazy extremes to try and get healthier, but every time my heart races, or I have a weird feeling somewhere in my body, it makes me afraid.  I was told by a friend who works in nutrition that this is pretty common.  That a major health scare is enough to get people motivated to take action for their health.  But hey, guess I’m just one of these whiners that Bill Maher so laments, because I didn’t fight in Iraq.

It just blows my mind how a guy who used to be one of the more progressive voices in comedy is now one of the most conservative people I have ever seen, all because he refused to believe that he might be wrong about some things.  It was great to hear Neil deGrasse Tyson absolutely DESTROY Maher about why his comedy isn’t as popular anymore.  My respect for Neil has never been higher.

Then there are Maher’s takes on what is happening in Gaza right now.  Naturally, he sucks Netanyahu’s evil cock like every other major media figure.  I call him Hitleryahu, becuase with what he is doing to the Palestinians in Gaza, I see no meaningful difference between Hitler and Netanyahu.  Maher has shit on everyone who is calling this what it is so hard.  Of course he is.

The real reason that conservatives absolutely LOVE Bill Maher right now is because Maher is kind of salty about the fact that everyone sees him as a stodgy fuck who is behind the times.  He is so virulently “anti-woke” these days, and has given so many conservatives a ball-washing in interviews with him because they agree with him about being “woke” and how bad that is.

Never mind that the dude is too pussy to go anywhere that he might have to actually defend himself.  Maher got all triggered when Tyson took him to school and told him flat-out that he wasn’t able to read the room anymore, and he got all offended and said that everyone else is the problem.  Even though he is a comedian and at the front-line of the battle for free speech, right?  Of course not.  The dude is a gutless coward who is mad that people don’t like him anymore.  Far as I’m concerned, he deserves it.

I have made a lot of points about separating the art from the artist, but honestly, I just can’t do that anymore.  Not with the person that Bill Maher has become.  It’s like re-reading Anne Rice’s books, knowing that towards the end of her life, she became a born-again Christian and denounced everything she ever wrote as disgusting sin.  Or re-reading Ender’s Game and knowing that Orson Scott Card was a VIRULENT homophobe, which is funny, considering some of the scenes in that book of the boys fighting while nearly naked.  Wondering if Card maybe had some issues there.  So that’s where I’m at with Bill Maher.  Probably for the best.  The dude does nothing but have L takes, and he can’t take the L and move on.

Still waiting on that PragerU video.

Until next time, a quote,

“Why does nothing make you happy?  You’re the grumpiest-” – Neil deGrasse Tyson

Peace out,

Maverick

The Anti-Woke Crowd Must be Miserable

I was watching YouTube tonight.  I was feeling like enjoying some South Park: The Fractured But Whole, and I was watching some of Penguinz0’s videos about Karens.  It’s always great to see his monosyllabic tone making sport of the Karens.  I’m so glad that public shaming of these entitled people is a thing.  For real, it makes me happy AF.  While I was watching that, I came across a short where a YouTuber I follow was responding to Sargon of Akkad and his little band of sad men shitting on Marvel’s Spider-Man 2.  What is their beef?  What do you think – it’s too “woke.”

As I listened to them bitching, my favorite bit was them saying “what escapism?  What are you escaping to?”  Oh, I don’t know, being a superhero with powers in a video game?!  Do you think that because a game is “woke”, that means that it’s exactly like the real world?  Seriously?  These fucking losers were just the worst to listen to.  But it got me to thinking about something, and I figured I would come here and talk about it.

I’ve noticed something about the anti-woke crowd – they must be the most miserable people.  Why do I think that?  Because all they do is shit on things.  There’s nothing that makes these people happy.  Is The Critical Drinker happy?  Well, by his own admission he’s a raging alcoholic, so obviously not.  Nobody who abuses booze to the levels that he claims he does (I’m well aware it’s probably schtick, but until I learn otherwise, why not roll with it?) is someone who is enjoying their life.

Anyone remember that insane rant from Heelvsbabyface about the pronoun selection in Starfield?  Something that had no bearing on gameplay, that you could just not engage with.  Something that you do exclusively for role-playing purposes.  You know, in a role-playing game.  Weird, right?  That people would want to get into their character and how they are addressed?  That they would want to make the character their own.  I can’t imagine how that would be something people who enjoy RPGs would like.

As I listened to that absolutely absurd rant by the fucking man-child, I realized that this is not the rant of a person that is happy.  Happy people do not make this much fuss.  Happy people do not yell and scream and cry about something that menial.  Something that you can totally ignore and it’s fine.  The game gives you that option.  But this dude absolutely lost his shit, to the point that it looked like he was going to do anger crying like a teenager who got dumped.  This is not a happy guy.  This is not someone who is enjoying their life.

Back in the day, when the SJW crowd was the Internet lolcow, I remember pointing out that these people can’t be happy.  They constantly are watching things, looking for reasons to be unhappy.  I hold to what I said back then.  I bet those people are still unhappy now.  That being said, their current contemporaries on the opposite side of the coin must be equally unhappy.  The are shitting on a game that as objectively good as Marvel’s Spider-Man 2 because it is woke.  Well…so?  It’s a quality product.

Here’s something that the anti-woke crowd just won’t get – it doesn’t matter how woke a product is, if the product is of good quality.  The only time these people are actually able to make light of something is when it is a product with a ton of woke ideas that happens to be a piece of shit.  Things like the bulk of Disney’s direct-to-streaming Star Wars series, or the fifth Indiana Jones movie.  Things like that are, rightly, shit on.  But not because they are “too woke,” but because they are trash.  They have woke ideas in them, but at the end of the day, if they were woke as fuck, but quality, nobody would care.  The latest Spiderverse film is a testament to that.  “Woke” as fuck, but solid reviews and solid box office numbers.  Marvel’s Spider-Man 2, tons of woke ideas, but it is selling like gangbusters and has reviewed exceptionally well.  It is my second favorite game of this year, after Hogwarts Legacy (the game that everyone seemed to forget about once it came out and the controversy was gone).  The wokeness of something has never been the deciding factor on how well it does with audiences.  It’s if the product itself is good or bad.

But for those people, they don’t see the product beyond how “woke” it is, and man is that depressing.  All the quality things that are in this world, that they can’t enjoy because they are so busy being angry.  Reminds me of that scene in Rick and Morty where Morty is going on this rant at Summer, and when Rick asks what his problem is, you find out there is something totally granola and stupid behind it all.  That’s the anti-woke crowd.  They have some personal beef, and so they have made it their entire life.  Just like the SJWs that they used to ridicule.  It would be funny, if they had the self-awareness to find the funny side of it.  But they don’t.  Instead, they have the butthurt and salty side of it.  The side that is mad because things changed and they didn’t want it to.

At the end of the day, that’s the big and small of it.  Things changed, and they don’t like it.  Sure, the beginning of that change was cringe.  That’s typically how it goes.  But Hollywood has learned from its mistakes.  Studio heads are greedy, but they aren’t stupid.  They realized that all the “woke” points in the world wouldn’t save them if the product sucked, so they decided to go at it another way.  Quality product first, woke points second.  It’s led to some amazing creations, like Cyberpunk 2077, the Spiderverse movies, and Puss in Boots: The Last Wish.  Hell, even the Super Mario Bros movie had a lot of woke elements, but was lauded as a quality product.  The studios have taken what works, and learned to not make the films/games have their woke elements front and center, but instead to incorporate them into a larger product.

Change is inevitable, and the anti-woke crowd can’t handle it.  They can’t accept that the world moves and grows, and they can either enjoy what comes from it that is of quality, or they can just check out and choose to live in the past.  This goes beyond movies and games.  Time is like this too.  Conservative America is desperately trying to turn the clocks back.  They are so desperate to make the world the way it used to be, but it’s going to fail.  They are on the wrong side of history, and are just making this an uglier point in history because of them stamping their bigoted feet and yelling about things not being the way they want anymore.

I feel sorry for the anti-woke crowd.  It sounds miserable.

Until next time, a quote,

“You act like prey, but you’re a predator!” – Rick Sanchez, Rick and Morty

Peace out,

Maverick