America Needs to Just Let COVID-19 Engulf It, because we’re stupid

For those of you who don’t know, America is really fucking dumb.  Like, stupid on a scale that is just phenomenal in the grand scheme of things.  It impresses me sometimes how utterly bereft of intelligence this country is.  Like, plenty of countries have stupid shit, but America really does take that cake.  This country has a gift at doing inane, retarded shit, seemingly out of spite for the concept of intelligence.  Hell, being smart is looked down upon here!  If you’re smart, people think you’re snobbish and “elitist.”  Being stupid is viewed by a vast amount of this country as a positive, because you can’t trust smart people.  I can’t think of any other country that thinks this way.  I’ve really tried to, but nothing’s coming to mind.

So it really should come as no surprise that in the face of a global pandemic, people have decided to fight back against the scientifically advised course of action, flattening the curve.  Instead, we have morons taking to the street with guns and signs in large numbers, demanding that the government not stop them from congregating.  That the government stay out of the way of whatever they want to do.  After all, this is America!  Nobody tells us what to do here!  Sure, these people are all basically taking their talking points from Fox News.  The second Fox News says something, their God-Emperor parrots it (because the orange man is basically just a retarded sponge), and then they have their viewpoints.  So when Fox News and their retarded orange God-Emperor says to stop social distancing and quarantining, to give your life for their all-powerful economy god, naturally these idiots have to take up the cause.

Oh sure, medical professionals in the parts of the country hit worst by this are begging people to stop and think about it, but that’s too hard for America.  We gotta go with our gut!  Because that’s NEVER led us down a horribly stupid path before, right?  Of course not.  It blows my mind that this country has actually avoided nuclear war all the way ’til now.  Hell, get this – did you know that while European and Asian countries have a ton of nuclear bomb shelters made and run by the state, do you know how many America has?  None!  Why?  Because part of Mutually Assured Destruction is that we had to convince the rest of the world that America really would pull the trigger and destroy all life as we know it on this planet just out of spite.  Part of that was showing that we are absolutely willing to throw the lives of the American people away on a whim.  And it worked!  I’m not surprised, really.  You just have to imagine in the halls of the KGB that the Soviets were like, “don’t tempt these fucking retards!  They’ll do it!  I swear, these lunatics are so stupid and so proud that they really would blow up the world to spite us!”

It just baffles me that something that you’d think would be a point of people coming together for the common good in the face of countless death and wanting to do the right thing has become a political issue.  Because of course it has.  If those in the halls of power can’t find absolutely anything to use as a wedge issue to keep the masses fighting among ourselves, they’ll use whatever they can.  This plague threatens their precious money, after all,  You have religious charlatans like Kenneth Copeland who literally blows air and says that COVID-19 is gone and will never come back.  Why?  Because he is desperate to get people into his church, so they can give him and his amoral bitch wife money.

See, underneath all the bullshit piety, the wealthy religious crowd in America couldn’t possibly care less about this God person that the masses are so desperate to love.  They’re too rich to believe in hocus pocus spiritual bullshit.  Instead, they worship at the alter of a God who keeps giving and giving to them – money.  The real power in America.  It’s the reason that Christmas is the ultimate corporate holiday.  It’s the reason that Easter became about candy.  And now it’s the reason that you have assholes like the Lt. Governor of Texas saying that we should be fine with letting Grandma and Grandpa die for their precious economy.  Because if them and the rich people who pay for their campaigns lose money, that makes them sad!  They might not be able to afford that yacht they wanted!  They might lose some of their precious millions.  The poor dears.

With all this in mind, I’ve decided that there is only one rational course of action open to the stupidity of this country – letting the plague run roughshod over the population.  Absolutely uncontained exposure.  Let this disease go everywhere.  Hell, let’s help it along!  Let’s take it to old folks homes and get them infected.  Glenn Beck said that old people are happy to die for their money god, so I say we speed up the process!  Fuck Granny and Grampy!  They can die, right?  Conservative America thinks so.  Oh, and the little ones.  Hell, plenty of them are asymptomatic, right?  So all we have to do is have them all in schools and get infected.  The teachers?  The fuck do we care.  This is America, after all.  Teachers are the dog we take out back to beat the shit out of to feel better about ourselves.  They’re just glorified babysitters after all, right?  So fuck them.  Their health can get fucked.

Think I’m being hyperbolic?  Well, honestly, not really.  This country can’t handle smart, so we have to resort to stupid.  We can’t do the smart, decent thing, so we have to do to the stupid, angry thing.  Science is the enemy, after all.  At least the science that doesn’t give us new cell phones that we can use to argue with people on Twitter.  Intelligence is a threat.  What have those smart people ever REALLY done for this country?  I can’t think of anything.  I’m sure the worshiped Founding Fathers were the biggest retards who ever walked the face of the Earth.

Now I know what you might be thinking – what about the new information coming out of South Korea and China showing that those who got infected are getting infected again, making people wonder if the whole idea of herd immunity would actually work.  Just don’t think about it!  The doctors are overpaid assholes anyway, right?  What do we care what they think?  After all, that one lady is covered in Jesus’ blood!  So fuck what the medical establishment thinks, right?  She goes to Walmart every day!  Let’s get her sick and see how great she feels about her words.  See what that Jesus blood does for her when that bitch needs a ventilator.

Sure, there’s the reality (a concept that conservatives avoid like social distancing) that a TON of people will die, but this is just the flu, right?  That’s what this asshole who is bitching about his child support payments and having to make them said to me on the phone today.  It being worse than the flu is just a liberal conspiracy!  All those doctors are just making a whole bunch of nothing out of it.  Why aren’t there people dying everywhere?  I mean, it isn’t like a ton of people would be dying everywhere if this idea of mine were actually to happen.  Fake News!  The orange retard’s favorite term.

This country is not intelligent enough to do ANYTHING out of virtue of self-preservation or for the common good.  An entire political party has been united behind the idea that we need to die for rich people’s money.  Baffling.  Kind of amazing.  So let’s just let this madness run its course.  The astronomical body-count, not just from the virus but also from patients who can’t get proper care because facilities that would otherwise have gone to them can’t be spared from the number of infected.  It makes me wonder, how many people would have to die before it is worth being concerned about?  If it killed 20 or 30% of people who contracted it, would it be serious then?  Maybe 40 of 50%?  Maybe then?  Well, the people protesting don’t seem to be using their brains for anything productive, so I don’t think there’s a death count high enough.  If my idea were to be followed, we might actually get to find out.

In America, people need to die so we can see the truth.  This country needs to suffer and become an example to the rest of the world of what not to do.  That’s our role.  Don’t do what the retarded Americans did.  Be smarter.  Flatten the curve.  I don’t actually want people to die, but if this country is going to be like this, then what’s the alternative?  The guy in charge of this circus is a fucking idiot, so maybe we just have to learn, like the child with a hot stove, that if you play with fire, you get burned.  Horribly, horribly burned.

Until next time, a quote,

“I’m in charge of this monkey farm now, Frankenstein!  And I wanna know what the fuck you’re doing with my time!” – Capt. Henry Rhodes, Day of the Dead

Peace out,


How Many Steps Forward Do I Take?

There’s this retarded video making the rounds that is supposed to educate everyone about the nature of privilege and show me that I’m a bad person for having all the privilege with the camera consistently cutting to some black guy who feels dejected for not being as far ahead as everyone else.  Well, I’ve decided to see how many steps I get to take.  I’ll answer each question and we’ll count the steps at the end.  I’ll also be proving a point with this at the same time.  I am a lower-class adult who is living just above the poverty level.  I grew up VERY lower-middle class.  As I said, it’s going to prove a point.

Take two steps forward if your parents are still married

Over 25 years and counting.  Probably closer to 30.  Took my two steps (in my mind).

Take two steps forward if you grew up with a father figure in the home.

Wait, I thought one of the big things is how we don’t need fathers anymore?  I thought that was a big regressive left talking point?  Took my two steps, though.  Thank Groj I’m not actually having to do this in real life.  My tiny-ass apartment isn’t good for it.

Take two steps forward if you had access to private education

The idea that my family was affording that is amusing to me.  I’m a public school boy just like pretty much the rest of you.  Ain’t taking those steps.

Take two steps forward if you had access to a free tutor

Not even in the state university I went to.  No steps taken.

Take two steps forward if you never had to worry about your cell phone being shut off

I’ve been so poor that my phone was shut off.  That’s the thing about having a prepaid cheap as shit phone.  Still standing here.

Take two steps forward if you’ve never had to help your parents with bills.

Finally, moving again.  Yeah, my parents are excellent with the money they have and are able to save well.  They learned how to do poverty right and thanks to both of them working for the school district in my hometown, they both have stable retirement, but it’s understood that because of their financial situation, one of them will be working until they are REALLY old.  Took my two steps, but this question is ignoring the nuance of the situation.

Take two steps forward if it wasn’t for your athletic ability, you didn’t have to pay for college.

My debt was $46,000.  Blow me.  Standing right here.

Take two steps forward if you’ve never had to worry about where your next meal would come from

I’ve starved myself before because of the poverty I’ve been in over the years.  But please, tell me again about all the privilege I have because of the color of my skin.  All fucking ears.

So let’s count the steps.  I took six.  Six steps.  How much do you figure the rich black kid who grew up on the hillside in the city I live in took?  A fuck of a lot more.  This stupid video that’s making the rounds ignores all nuance because it’s easier to show the dejected black guy looking sad and play to one’s pathos than to look at those of us who grew up in a poor community and had to work our fucking asses off to get where we are.  I hate that video, and fuck the people who say it’s so inspiring.  Fuck everyone who wants to tell me about the fact that I have it so much better because I’m white.

Here’s the thing about privilege – if someone could tell me how I could cash this shit in, I would.  I really would.  Without a second thought, I would.  I’d go to the Privilege Bank and get all the perks I could get, today.  My life has been so fucking hard and I am so fucking tired of being poor and having to balance doing repairs on my car with saving a hundred bucks a month.  That’s the position I’m in.  You want to tell me about how I have it so good because of my fucking privilege?  Yeah, you do that, upper-middle class white girl with hair dyed a color not found in nature, of the black kid who is attending an Ivy League school on your parent’s dime.

Go right ahead.  Because my answer is the same – can you direct me to where I can cash in this privilege?  If so, I’ll talk to you later.  I got somewhere I need to be.

Until next time, a quote,

“One ungrateful person does an injury to all needy people.” – Pubilius Syrus

Peace out,


Lucien’s Unpopular Opinion: That Kid Should have Died, not the Gorilla

I’m sure all of you have heard the story by now.  A kid was climbing on the edge of an enclosure to a gorilla exhibit at a zoo.  The kid slips, falls in, and the gorilla goes to confront the kid, with various statements about its intent.  In turn, the zookeepers then decided to shoot this animal that was just confronting an intruder in its territory.  This is a gorilla.  Part of a species that is critically endangered.  I am not even a fan of zoos, but at least this one was working to help keep a species that is heading towards extinction alive.  If we can say nothing else about this place, it’s that.  Now, this animal is dead because it was doing what a gorilla in the wild would do and attack an intruder in its territory.

Here is my unpopular opinion – that kid should have been left to get beaten to death by that gorilla, not that animal getting shot.  Here are a few reasons why.  First, where was this kid’s dumb-fuck parent?  Why weren’t they saying not to fuck around with a gorilla enclosure?  I would think that would have come up with you teach your kid how to not be an idiot.  Second, how is that gorilla in the wrong for defending its territory from an unknown intruder?  I honestly want to know.  How is it the bad guy?  What did that animal do wrong here?  How was it to know that this was the child of some vapid parent who clearly can’t parent very well?  Finally, there are seven billion people on this planet.  Way I figure it (and this is going to come off as more than a little cruel, so if that bothers you, best leave now), we could stand to let some of the dumb go flowing down the river and out of the gene pool.  Know what I mean?

This reminds me of an incident back when I was a little kid.  I mean REALLY little.  There was an Australian woman who was trying to get into a polar bear enclosure at the zoo in the city I live in.  Her idea was to get a picture.  There were two fences that were there, with the obvious intent of telling her not to get too close.  But common sense isn’t something all people are born with.  The bear, naturally, saw this woman as an intruder and grabbed the leg that was within reach and bit down.  It ripped her leg up something fierce.  Way I figure it, fuck that girl.  Neat story – six weeks later, that bear attacked another bunch of intruders.  This time, it was some dumb-fuck kids who were wasted and wanted to go swimming.  It tore one of them’s leg the fuck apart.  The zoo decided to do the smart thing and not blame and hurt the animal for these attacks.  You know who was blamed?  The fucking idiots who decided that common sense is too hard and should be ignored!

That gorilla did nothing wrong.  At all.  It is the victim because some parent can’t nut-up and do their fucking job right and watch their dumbass kid.  Way I see it, that gorilla have every right to beat the fucking kid to death!  Oh, I’m sorry.  Is my lack of sympathy not nice?  I’m just so damn tired of all these people whose stupidity is rewarded.  An innocent animal just protecting its habitat paid the ultimate price for this.  That’s disgusting.

If this were my kid, and they were so stupid as to do this, and that gorilla didn’t kill them, as soon as they are out of the hospital I’m going to beat their ass!  And they are losing all their privileges for the rest of their time in my home.  As far as I’m concerned, they get to live like a monk as penance for the death of an innocent victim to save their worthless life.  And before those who know that I eat meat call me a hypocrite, the chicken, fish, and moose that I consume aren’t endangered.  The moose is stuff that my family hunts.  Do I have an issue with factory farming?  Sure.  If I could, I’d make sure these animals lived in an open-range environment and got to enjoy some of their time before being slaughtered.  But this gorilla is part of a critically-endangered species.  That zoo was helping keep that population alive.  If I had the talents of the Jurassic Park team (I realize this is fiction, but if the concept existed), I’d be resurrecting all sorts of species that we’ve driven to extinction.  But since that doesn’t exist, we have zoos doing the best they can.

I guess this post was just a rant, but I feel like it needed to be said.  This kid should be fined.  I guess the nice thing is the fact that what has happened here will follow him the rest of his life.  His family too.  Fuck these people.  I feel no sympathy for them.  The fact that I am sure the parents are going to sue the zoo as a way to make a quick buck (because America is all about that) just adds to how much this pisses me off.

That’s my unpopular opinion of the day.

Until next time, a quote,

“Common sense is a flower that doesn’t grow in everyone’s garden.”  – Unknown

Peace out,


Ladies, Let’s Get Real About Advertising…

Hey ladies, no corporation cares about you, beyond the fact that they can make money off of you.  That’s a fact.  None of these companies that do so-called “female empowerment” give two flying fucks about you.  They don’t care.  You’re a dollar sign to them.  They want to sell you shit you don’t need, and create things for you to worry about, so you’ll buy their shit.  Sorry if that doesn’t come off as very nice, but I just needed this to get out there.  In the age of PC bullshit, truth is a precious resource that is woefully under-explored.  With that in mind – ladies, not one of the corporations that are in favor of “girl power” give a single solitary fuck about you, and just want you to be a cash machine for them.

The simple truth about advertising is that all these companies view people as is just money coming in.  Advertising’s sole purpose is to part a fool from his money.  What’s more, if you want to sell people something, it’s best to make them REALLY insecure.  I mean as insecure as possible.  You know, I think I’ll let a really fantastic video put it into perspective for you.

I always find it funny when people actually believe that companies legit care about them and what they think.  They don’t.  They care so far as – “oh shit, these people aren’t buying your product!  Let’s find a way to get more of them to do it!”  But then you have people like the ones who got behind Chick-fil-A after their CEO came out against gay marriage.  Something that they back-pedaled on, after they realized that they were losing money.  Oreo’s rainbow cookie wasn’t a sign of support for gay people.  It was a sign that they saw a potential to make brand recognition.  So is the Girl Power nonsense.  They create brand recognition based on people and their propensity for having to either really get in support of or really hate stuff.

What is it about ads that make people like Ellen Degeneres think that these companies give two single shits about them?  Wait, bad example.  That they give two shits about her audience?  Her, they like.  She can promote their shit.  Oprah made a killing off of hocking shit to people.  Dr. Oz has made a killing off of hocking bullshit supplements to people.  Martha Stewart was smart enough to create her own brand, that she could make a killing off of hocking.  But at the end of the day, each and every person that they sold shit to was just a way for them to get money to their respective brands, which in turn got money to them.  Money in, money out.

If you have a chance, watch the film Thank You For Smoking.  It is the greatest comedy film ever made, because it shows us just hos insidious the world of advertising is, while making excellent points about how dumb people are for buying into it.  A man who hocked cigarettes was able to make the manipulative corporate structure of what he did not only seem like the sensible choice, but make a great point about how stupid people are, and how eager they are to believe in a brand.  Truly, it is probably the smartest movie about advertising ever made.  It’s part of my inspiration as I am going to be working as an account manager at a PR firm soon.  By the way – most awesome thing ever!  No joke, this is the biggest opportunity of my life, and I am so fucking stoked for it.

However, the companies that I am going to be representing are depending on my firm to do the EXACT same thing that the people in the video above are (satirically, though it really is a great point about what real companies do) doing.  We are to get as many of the dimwits who watch this garbage to buy stuff.  I am hoping that some of you in my audience are smart enough to realize that these people are doing nothing more than exploiting people.  None of them care about women.  None of them care about men.  All the SJWs who get stupidly attached to companies just play into their hands.  I would be annoyed by it, if it wasn’t so utterly transparent.  But don’t tell your local SJW that.  The moment that they choose to critically analyze something is a VERY cold day in Hell.

“I was annoyed at that Oreo thing to, because all I could think is – I want that cookie, and I can’t have it”  -TJ Kirk

Peace out,


Lucien’s First Take: God’s Not Dead 2: Official Trailer

When I first heard about this on Facebook, my first thought was – this can’t be real.  This has to be some BRILLIANT trolling from some brilliant people.  It has to be.  I mean, what person could honestly want to make a sequel to the piece of shit movie that only made money because it was so bad that it was funny?  A movie that the Internet mocked to death, to the point where it became like beating a dead horse.  Who could really want a sequel.  After doing some digging, though, I realized that this is 100% on the level.  A Christian film company that offers a streaming service for Christian movies has the license, and has made a sequel to what was one of last year’s funniest movies.  Let’s take a look at the official trailer, and see if this is either going to be painful or funny.

Who knew that Melissa Joan Hart had gone radical Christian?  I didn’t.  This is…painful.  The first film, I’ll give it this – it had Kevin Sorbo.  And he was so fun to watch!  He was like a Captain Planet villain.  It was great.  Not to mention the mellow-drama that permeated the entire fucking movie.  I loved it!  Here, we don’t have that.  What we have instead is one of the oldest recycled bullshit lines about how Christianity is forced out of public schools.  This talking point has been beaten to death so much that it’s barely worth responding to!  But this movie decided to run with it.

There are some points where I was laughing in this.  For one, since when did public education put a hit out on teachers?  The fuck?!  Not to mention, I just LOVE the vilification of the ALCU.  Wow.  I’ve seen Saturday morning cartoons in the 80’s that were more subtle than this.  Groj be praised!  Because the ACLU is so EVIL!  Right?  Then they do a nice little rip-off of Inherit the Wind, where they take the idea that God exists to a courtroom.  Shameless?  Maybe, but it’s still a little amusing.

The biggest thing lacking from this movie is a fun villain! We need one!  We need another Kevin Sorbo.  A pity he died in the last movie (spoiler alert.  Wait, never mind.  You don’t care).  There is no villain, other than the EVIL public education system.  And our good Christian boy lawyer is going to prove to a jury that God exists.  Part of me is curious to see how they will do that.  They say that they will prove the existence of Jesus Christ.  Okay, I guess that they could prove that a person named Jesus existed.  Though, his story is awfully familiar to a ton of other savior stories circulating around the Mediterranean at the time.  I can’t see how you could honestly prove the existence of Jesus as a divine being.  Or a divine being at all.  Oh, I’m sure that they’ll gloss over all the very valid arguments that there is no way to prove that he exists.  Like the fact that ANY argument you make to prove the existence of God, I can use to prove the existence of Almighty Groj (linked here).  Or the fact that God has NEVER shown his existence in a way that is verifiable and recorded, in the days when we have video cameras.

But we all know that that isn’t what this film will do.  They’ll crank out some typical bullshit, like about how we all just know that God exists, or that you can see God’s existence in everything around you or something like that.  We saw the “arguments” that these people have in the last film.  But I’m sure that the jury will be swayed and totally believe.  Then the school will become full of Christians and Christianity will win!  Yay!

I will say that this film looks to have a modicum better production quality than the last movie, which got absolutely nothing right in terms of production elements.  So there’s that, I guess.

Then they end the trailer with that god-awful song from the last movie.  Wow.  This film is going to suck, and without a fun villain to enjoy, I can’t honestly see anything here that makes me want to actually watch it.  You all let me know what you think in the comments.

Until next time, a quote,

Initial Verdict
2 out of 10

Peace out,


Being a Man is WRONG! Get it?! (A response to A Man’s Apology)

Are you a man?  Are you straight?  I’m bi, but I have a side of me that likes girls, so I am part of this demographic, to an extent.  If so, you are EVIL!  You are everything wrong with the world!  You are a liar!  You are a manipulator!  You are a duplicitous bastard that is every single thing wrong with the world.  For real, none of the world’s problems would exist without you.  Don’t believe me?!  Well, let’s take a look at this video, that spells out rather plainly just how awful you are.

Okay, all kidding aside, this video pisses me off. It’s the latest in a string of videos that has one purpose – to make men understand just how awful they are, and how we have been and are so awful to women.  Because women are perfect flowers who have no imperfections and NEVER lie or do anything wrong, right?  No woman has EVER cheated on a man, right?  No woman has EVER lied or used a man to an excessive degree, right?  Well, according to these pathetic beta-males, yeah.  Pretty much.

Then, of course, they have to flagellate themselves and praise the glory of women, because they are so evil.  That’s right.  All men are liars and pigs.  Us men are just animals who are looking to find ways to use and throw women away.  There are no words for how utterly enraged this makes me.  And they have to make sure to tell the women who watch this that being a man is just so wrong.  That testosterone that you have in your system?  That’s just society’s programming!  Fuck biology!  Hormones?  That’s just patriarchy talking!  No man actually feels those things.  They are just what society teaches us.  And, as they make sure to beat you over the head with, over and over again, it makes you bad.

What’s more, this video idolizes this weird trend in SJW, third-wave feminism that it’s wrong to like things.  Like sports?  That’s wrong!  Like lifting weights and being buff?  That’s wrong too!  Like thinking that pretty ladies are sexy?  Oh, that’s definitely wrong!  Why, when you see a woman and find her attractive, you see her as an object!  What’s that?  You see an attractive woman and think that this is someone you’d like to get to know better?  That’s bullshit!  So obviously a lie.  That’s what all us men are is liars.  As this video goes out of its way to make sure that we understand.

Ladies, I’m gonna let you in on something – this idea that all guys want the supermodels is false.  Some guys do.  But not all guys.  Everyone guy has different tastes.  Just like every woman.  It’s part of the human experience.  I can’t believe that I’m the one who has to explain this.  Oh, maybe I’m “mansplaining.”  Well, you know what – fuck it!  If this has to be spelled out to you, then so be it.  This mission to demonize men for liking what they like makes me sick!  Not to mention, once-again, I just love how lesbian and bisexual women are cut out of the conversation about sexual attraction to women.  Do people believe that if a girl is gay, she’s instantly enlightened and loves all body types equally.  That is bullshit!  My friend Erin likes girls who are smoking hot.  She keeps fun pictures that an ex of hers sent and looks at them whenever she wants a jolly in her pussy.  I’m sorry, but being gay or straight doesn’t instantly make a person a demon or a saint.  If you don’t know that, then that’s on you, not everyone else.

Then they get into cheating, and here they might have had a point.  But nope, they also have to make sure that they show that guys who watch porn are pieces of shit too.  That’s just like cheating!  More proof that third-wave feminism is Puritanical as fuck.  I find it so funny that so many of these beta-males and third-wave feminists are atheists.  Why?  They believe in the mindset of the church.  These women are prudish to the point that they might as well wear a hijab and follow Islam.  They do go so far out of their way to talk about how it is a “race” and that castigating it is wrong.  Just go all the way, ladies.  What do you have to lose?

And don’t even get me started when they talk about what it is to be the “perfect man.”  What the fuck do they know about being a man at all?!  When have these people ever done anything manly in their lives?!  Oh, but I can already hear the feminists –

Just because what they do is different than you, that doesn’t make it less ‘manly’, you misogynist pig!

What women buy into this mentality?  I’ll tell you who – women who have either never had a real relationship and really connected with someone, or women who have no interest in men altogether, so they figure that this is right for other women.  That’s it.  The guy Anita Sarkeesian has been dating, he’s not some pathetic beta male.  Though, that’s a bad example.  She’s a con artist, and he’s one of the people who taught her how to be.  The guy that Rebecca Watson has been bumping uglies with (last I heard) wasn’t a beta male either.  The kind of women who like men who are so utterly subservient and pathetic are the kinds of women who exploit that.  I used to be one of these kinds of guys.  I’ve gotten exploited.  But I learned my lesson.

Seeing stuff like this drives me nuts, because it’s another one of these pathetic videos that women who buy into the canards of third-wave, Puritan Feminism puts out.  They buy into the 1 in 5 rape statistic.  They buy into the 77 cents on the dollar statistic.  None of them are critical of anything they hear in their echo chamber.  So, this video will go into that echo chamber, where men in their early 20’s tells women EXACTLY what they think they want to hear.  Which leads, finally, to the moral of this pussy-whipping in action – Jesus loves you!  Love Jesus!

Though, when you really think about it, modern religion and modern feminism as so interchangeable that if you replaced Jesus with feminism, would you really see the difference?

Until next time, a quote,

“This video should be packaged and sold as an ipecac alternative.  And a vagina de-moisturizer.”  -Peter Broady

Peace out,


You Copyright Nazi D-Bags (A response to Saban Entertainment)

Oh yeah, I’m going there.  I’m about to attack these people without a single bit of mercy.  They deserve it.  They deserve all the vitriol and all the trash talking they get.  Why?  Because Saban Entertainment has decided to exploit the DMCA.  For what reason?  Because they’re butthurt.  For real, that’s what it boils down to.  They got butthurt about an amazing fan film (that was 100X better than their POS film is going to be) that they don’t like, so they requested that it be taken down.  A bunch of amazing people put a lot of time and effort into this movie and what do they do?  They destroy it, purely out of spite.  I have a lot of rage to go around, so let’s get to it.

POWERRANGERSFor those who don’t know, the producer of Dredd, another awesome film that was made after something cartoonish and silly was made, decided to make a short film based on the series Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.  Keeping with the style of Dredd, it was dark, gritty and in-your-face.  What’s more, it touched on some of the elements that I actually thought about as I got older.  Zordon recruits the original Power Rangers as teenagers.  So, they are child soldiers, fighting his war for him.  The short film looked at that, showing how it would actually be horrifying to live that kind of life.  It had some awesome performances form the guy who played Dawson in Dawson’s Creek and a woman whose name I forget in Battlestar Galactica.  It was a great film.  There was a lot of heart and it looked at dark issues that, when you read between the lines of the original series, were there.

Now, Saban Entertainment, the people who hold the original copyright to the series, saw this film, they were not happy.  Turns out, the guy in charge of the company is a control freak and kind of a douche.  They really hated that film.  They didn’t like how it painted the Power Rangers and the universe they inhabited.  They didn’t like the grit and the violence (and it was violent.  This short film had a LOT of blood and gore).  They didn’t like the implication that the Rangers were being used as child soldiers (even though they so obviously were).  They didn’t like it.

They weren’t the only ones.  The guy who originally played Tommy (the only good character in the original series, though only when he was the Green Ranger) was also not a fan.  I kind of get that.  After all, he made his career (what it is) on the back of that series and he doesn’t want to rock the boat.  It is still making him money.

However, the Internet LOVED it.  For real, that film got almost 12 million hits in a few days.  Do you know how crazy that is?!  The Internet, as a whole, thought that this was the best thing ever.  Most people wanted more.  They wanted to see an entire film about this.  Myself, I kind of do, but I also recognize that this might have worked better as a short, so some of the sillier elements didn’t stick out as much.  Like their Ranger outfits, which were still kind of silly.  Still, this got a lot of online attention, and when something has the Internet’s attention, do you know what you don’t want to do?  Try and ruin their good time.

See, Saban used DMCA to get the video taken down.  Why?  Well, I have a theory – it’s because they are trying to preserve the series wholesome and family-friendly image (as stupid and cartoonish), which as relevance now for them, because they have a new movie coming out.  That’s right, Lionsgate has made a reboot film for the franchise, which is going to be coming out reasonably soon.  Saban, being the butthurt douchebags that they are, doesn’t want this film to color people’s expectations.

Too late, Saban!  For real, they are now the victims of the Streisand Effect.  They have tried to censor this movie, but that is only going to make this worse for them.  If only they let this alone, the blowback might not have been so ugly.  After all, you can bet that a TON of people are already working to mirror the video.  The more they work to take them down, the more people who will put them up.  This is the Internet, you morons!  Do you really think that a video this popular can be released and that you can just destroy it?!  If so, then you are the stupidest people to have ever existed, and you deserve the PR meltdown that will happen to you because of it.

For my take, I have this to say – Saban, your movie is going to suck.  In fourteen minutes, that fan film had more heart and character than your hour and a half film will.  What’s more, the Internet is not a forgiving place.  You have gotten its ire.  Sales will suffer because of this.  Since the bulk of what’s left of the original series fan base is people who are on the Internet, the bulk of whom loved the fan film, you are going to suffer for this in a financial way.  And you have no one to blame but yourselves.  You are stupid.  You got butthurt, and now you are going to see the Internet’s wrath.

You fucking deserve it, you copyright Nazi pricks.  Good luck with the new movie.

An apt quote, to close out on,

“Good luck!  You’re gonna need it.” – Han Solo, Star Wars: Return of the Jedi

Peace out,


Suspended for Playing Pretend?! Really?! (A response to Kermit Elementary School)

I have made no secret of my disdain for PC culture.  It is getting absolutely out of control.  And the psycho-parents haven’t helped.  You got dodgeball banned, or if it exists, they got rid of the rubber balls.  There was that story about a six year old boy who was almost put on the sex offender list for playing “doctor” with a five year old girl.  There are so many stories about how pathetically scared and worthless people in this country are, and now I got another to add to the pile.  This one actually does annoy me, because it tells me that this country is doing everything it can to take away children’s childhood.  Let’s get down to it.

So, there is this kid in west Texas whose dad took him to see the latest Hobbit movie.  He shouldn’t have bothered, because the movie is melodramatic in a way that the Lord of the Rings films never were (not to mention the whole thing with Smaug, which was retarded).  But whatever.  So, the kid loves the movie, and he has a ring that looks like the One Ring, and he tells his friend that the ring can make the friend disappear.  Then, the kid got suspended.  Not even kidding.  Why?  Because, according to the principal, he was making “terroristic threats.”

Are you kidding me?  Are you fucking kidding me?!  Yes, he was making “terroristic threats” because he was playing pretend with his friend, he gets suspended.  Here’s a great quote that should really put it all into perspective for you how stupid this is.

Any kind of threat, whether it be magical or pretend, is considered a terrorist threat, and therefore the boy had to be suspended.

That was from the Principal of Kermit Elementary, and – are you fucking kidding me?!  You admit that it was pretend!  It wasn’t a real threat!  I was a kid playing pretend with his friend.  How can you be that stupid?!  The father’s response to this was priceless.

I assure you that my son lacks the magical powers to threaten his friend’s existence.  If he did, I’m sure he would bring him back.

Way to put all of this stupidity in its place.  I mean, come on!  But this kid seems to have a history of suspension.  Man, he must be a problem kid!  What did he do?!  Well, in one instance – he called a black kid black.  The other time, he brought a book to school that had a drawing of a pregnant woman.  Not porn or anything like that.  Just a drawing of a woman that happened to be pregnant.

I don’t honestly know how this country can get any dumber.  For real, I don’t.  I mean, this is so stupid!  I’m sure that the kid didn’t mean anything racist when he referred to a black kid as black.  He didn’t call the kid any racial epithets.  Just stated that the kid was black.  And that was worth suspending him over?!  Then – are you all afraid of pregnant women?!  Do you just have an aversion to talking about them?!  Now, he’s been suspended for playing pretend.  Un-fucking-real.  Oh, and here’s something to note – the family of this kid moved into this area six months ago.  In six months, he has been suspended three times – for nothing!  For absolutely nothing!

I continually tell people that America is turning into a police state.  Hell, we’re already there.  The evidence is undeniable.  It’s a weird police state where everyone is guilty, all the time.  You want to express your imagination with your friends?  Guilty!  You want to describe a kid to another kid?  Guilty!  You want to have a book that you like at school?  Guilty!  I remember when I was in school.  We used to beat the shit out of each other in dodgeball.  I was always tall, so I was a clear target, but when I did hit someone, they were feeling it the rest of the day.

Oh, this brings me to another story.  There was a woman who was charged with child neglect.  Why?  Because she let her kid walk home from school.  What the fuck is wrong with this country?!  I walked home from the bus, almost a mile from my stop to where I lived, every single day since I was in middle school.  For real, I could have gotten trampled by a moose, eaten by a black bear or kidnapped by some creepy pedophile, every single weekday for years.  And that’s fine!

We have this scary thing happening in this country where everyone is constantly worried about letting the children be who they are, or developing normally.  Oh no, my kid played ‘doctor’ with another kid!  Does that mean that they are developing as a young person in a way that I will have to actually be a parent and talk to them about?!  I don’t want that!  Oh no, a kid played pretend with his friend and said something mildly threatening that anyone with more than ten brain cells would recognize isn’t serious.  We’d better clamp down on that behavior!

I have a friend who used to be a substitute teacher.  She told me about how kids at the middle school I went to are now forced to sit in their seats at lunch, never get up, never raise their voice, and stay in that place until lunch ends.  If they break the rules, they are immediately in trouble.  That idea scares the hell out of me.  We are forcing children to behave like machines, at the age when they are forming who they are.  I can’t be the only one who sees how bad that could get.  For real, who sees that too?  Anyone?

Let me know down in the comments section.  You know, I don’t remember thinking that 1984 was supposed to be a guide or the future.  I guess schools didn’t get the memo.

Until next time, a quote,

“Stupid is as stupid does.”  -Forrest Gump

Peace out,


“Birth Rape.” Yes, This is How Stupid We’ve Become

I have a theory.  See, we all know that humanity is really stupid and almost beyond redemption.  But I have a theory that the stupidity is centralized.  There are two major places in America.  The first is Texas.  The closer you get to Texas, the dumber humanity gets.  Of course, that kind of stupidity is very specific.  That’s conservative Fundie stupidity.  The second place is San Fransisco.  The closer you get to that city, the more PC liberal stupidity you are surrounded with.  I love that bit on South Park where you have San Fransisco being enveloped in “smug.”  Well-put, good sirs.  Well-put indeed.  So, what does all this have to do with the topic at hand?  Well, let’s just say that I genuinely believe that this person must be right at the center of San Fransisco, and this idiot has a bad case of the “smug.”  They are so stupid.

I’ve had to put with a lot of PC, SJW bullshit over the years.  There was the woman who said that she needed feminism because of “stare rape.”  There was Rebecca Watson in the elevator, and the apologists who came to her defense.  Now we have a new contender to the throne – birth rape.

That’s right, it seems we’ve got another none-issue to add to the throne of things that aren’t really rape, but people are actually going to believe are.  Birth rape (linked here), is described as such –

A woman who is raped while giving birth does not experience the assault in a way that fits neatly within the typical definitions we hold true in civilised society. A penis is usually nowhere to be found in the story and the perpetrator may not even possess one. But fingers, hands, suction cups, forceps, needles and scissors… these are the tools of birth rape and they are wielded with as much force and as little consent as if a stranger grabbed a passer-by off the street and tied her up before having his way with her. Women are slapped, told to shut up, stop making noise and a nuisance of themselves, that they deserve this, that they shouldn’t have opened their legs nine months ago if they didn’t want to open them now. They are threatened, intimidated and bullied into submitting to procedures they do not need and interventions they do not want. Some are physically restrained from moving, their legs held open or their stomachs pushed on.

So, where do I begin?  What the fuck do I begin?  This is so insane, so utterly nuts that it’s hard to actually know where to start.  I guess we’ll start at the beginning.  This persons admits that there is no sexual penetration of any kind.  I’d end this conversation there, but let’s delve deeper into this madness, because if you look at the comments section (which I’m sure is heavily moderated, since I didn’t see a disagreeing opinion one calling out this bullshit for what it is), people actually buy this!  WT fuck?!

Yes, I’m sure that the doctors in delivery rooms are just going against the woman’s will.  No woman has ever wanted to deliver a baby in the hospital.  That’s why women instinctively know to go there, so medical professionals can make the delivery as easy and safe as possible.  Nope, they are being dragged in, like some whore off the street!  They’re tied to those beds and brutally violated by those doctors!  Animals!  And what doctor is slapping women and telling them to shut up?  Did you deliver a baby in Rwanda?  Yes, because them telling women to “push!” is basically like, “shut your stupid mouth, bitch!”  I totally see the connection.

Next, “submitting to procedures they do not need and interventions they do not want.”  I had a friend who just had a kid.  She wasn’t the healthiest sort, and there was a complication.  They had to go in surgically and remove the infant, or else both she and the child would have died!  Don’t you sit there, you fucking moron, and tell people that they don’t need this.  Yeah, let’s just go back to delivering babies in the caves!  Because that’s totally better, right?  It’s not like women back in the day didn’t die of complications from childbirth all the time, right?  No, that’s not a thing.  Let’s just ignore history.  That’s written by men!  And as we all know, men are just horrible misogynists in America.

Here’s the truth, you ignorant fucker – modern medicine has made childbirth safer and better than it’s ever been.  You seem to idolize some kind of golden age of birth, getting suckered to the SJW canard of a “rape culture” that doesn’t exist.  Women who go to hospitals to have babies are not being dragged there against there will.  Well, okay, I’m sure that in a country this big, somebody might be.  But the VAST majority of people go because they want to have their baby in a place where, if something happens, there will be trained professionals who can care for both them and their infant.  Your denial of this is both insulting and REALLY fucking stupid!

I swear to God, the amount of things they are able to say are “rape” these days is taking all the seriousness of actual rape away.  I swear, we’re getting to a point where I can see a news story saying, “Infant sexually violated his own mother!  Chicago-area woman Linda McStupidAss said in an interview, ‘he tried to suckle my bare breast!  It was mortifying!'”  Yes, I stole that line from The Amazing Atheist.  It worked in his video and it works here.  This is getting nuts.  SJWs have got women so convinced that everything that isn’t conservatively sexual (with the guy asking for permission every step of the way, because that’s how normal intimacy works, right?) behavior is rape.  These people are so terrified of sex that they are taking a real crime that has real repercussions and stripping it of all seriousness.  The more people who take this madness seriously, the more I can’t help but wish for an asteroid to end humanity, so Earth can try again.

Until next time, a quote,

“There’s nothing worse than a sincere idiot.”  -TJ Kirk

Peace out,


So, You Want McDonald’s to Sponsor Your Religion? (A response to McMass)

With all the stupid shit in this country, like Puritan Feminists and Fox News, it might be hard to look on what America does and be like, “man, I just love this country!”  But then, you hear a news story that reminds you why you enjoy living in this backwards, slowly-crumbling empire so much.  For me, it’s because I am just so entertained!  This country is so full of idiots that it makes me always so pleased.  You’d think that I wouldn’t be.  You’d think that the stupidity would bug the fuck out of me.  For a time, it did.  However, as I got a little older and a little wiser, I wasn’t quite the shit-kicker that I used to be when I started this blog.  Now, I just shake my head and enjoy the show.

McMass ProjectSo, what is today’s show about?  Well, a preacher man named Paul Di Lucca has started an Indiegogo project that has one stated goal – buying a McDonald’s for the express purpose of getting it inside a church.  You can’t make this shit up.  He’s crowd-funding to get a fast food restaurant inside of a church.  This is weird and wrong and right on so many levels, but I’m getting ahead of myself.  Why is he doing this?

Well, Di Lucca has noticed how there has been something of an exodus from religion in this country, so he wants to help turn it around.  His plan of action is rather unique, I must say – appeal to fat people!  And not only appeal to fat people, but also get them to help you crowd-fund your project to buy a McDonald’s and get it in a church.  That is amazing.  It just boggles the mind.  While McDonald’s has not officially commented, Di Lucca made a comment that, just read it –

Will McDonald’s save Christianity in America?  Maybe not – and in fact, probably not.  But the McMass Project has the power to get the conversation started.

Only in America.  For real, only here.  Dumb shit happens everywhere, but only in America do you have the dumb shit take center stage in such a way as this.  McDonald’s is going to save Christianity in America?!  Are you fucking kidding me?!  I can’t stop laughing about this.  It’s just so funny!  What planet is this guy on?!  He thinks that this whole initiative is going to get the ball rolling on a conversation about this issue.  I keep expecting to hear that this is satire, like an article in The Onion making fun of religion and how corporate it has all gotten in this country.  But no!  It’s real!

Now, a number of church activists are against this.  Why?  Well, according to them, it’s breaking traditions and whatnot.  To that, I say – have you ever seen a mega-church?  I have.  Been in one, actually.  Those places are cities unto themselves.  I’m with The Young Turks in being kind of surprised that this idea hasn’t come up before.  It’s so perfect.  After all, religion really is nothing but a bunch of money-changers.  Only now, instead of them being in the temple, they own the damn thing.  There’s a step in the right direction, am I right?  But when you look at the metropolis mega-churches, or the Vatican palaces (both of which would offend Jesus to no end), how can you say that having a McDonald’s in a church is offensive?  That just seems like you want to preserve this image you have of the little church in the countryside, where all the women wear dresses and all men are in their finest suits and country hats.  Religion in the 21st century can’t sell out fast enough.  Since there is a large exit from the church, they are doing whatever they can to get people to sign on.  It’s getting kind of sad, really.

A friend of mine, who thinks that this is the stupidest thing ever and is annoyed by it, pointed out something interesting to me.  There is an ethical conflict in a church buying a fast food joint and putting it in the church.  See, churches are tax exempt, because they are ‘places of worship.’  I’ve always thought that that is stupid and should be rescinded, but whatever.  That’s neither here nor there.  However, if a corporate entity like McDonald’s is going to throw in with a church, how can they possibly claim that they are still a religious institute?  They have corporate backing!  If people are coming to their church to order food instead of worship, isn’t there a conflict there?  That is something worth considering, and I would LOVE to see how Di Lucca is going to get around this question.

However, at the end of the day, I am still amused.  See, if they are going to go the route of corporate sponsorship, I want them to go all the way!  For real, have the church give out coupons on stuff to people who attend services.  You can’t just come there for the food.  You have to attend McMass before you can get cheaper garbage food.  Have the preacher do a plug-in at the beginning.

Today’s service is brought to you by McDonald’s!  Because even God needs a Big Mac every once and a while!

In fact, given that I am educated in PR work, I would do the ad campaign for this!  For real, I would have so much fun promoting McMass.  Me, a douchebag liberal atheist, would love to promote this.  It’s like a tacit admission that they don’t give a fuck about God.  They just want to get people’s fat asses into their pews.  I love it!  There’s my slogan for the campaign!

God’s Lovin’ It

*any and all usage of that line is owned by Lucien Maverick and must pay royalties to him*

Until next time, a quote,

“No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.”  -H.L. Mencken

Peace out,