I was born in and interesting time. For starters, it was the end of the 90’s boom when I am coming up. I’m 29 years old, and I got to see the 90’s end, with the great technological boom ending with it. Now we have the post-recession economy. The job market is dead. This country is stagnating. With the legalization of pan (whoever gets that without looking it up is my friend) there is a huge boom to incomes of various states, my own among them. With Jeff Sessions saying he is going to crack down on the legal market, you have states looking to fight back because they don’t want to lose the revenue. It’s not even a million dollar market anymore. It’s going into the billions. States are starting to catch on that the safest drug in the world can bring absurd amounts of money into their economies, and so they are stepping up to fight the federal government. It’s inspiring stuff.
We also have the age of the Internet and of celebrity culture. Because if some celebrity isn’t qualified to be a leader of the free world, who is? I am of course talking about President Trump. When I was watching the podcast I referenced before, and how they talked about Trump running, it’s amazing how the opinions changed over time. People all saw his running as a joke that would play itself out. But as the Democratic party rigged the primary against Sanders (thank you Donna Brazile for exposing that definitively), and the Republican candidates all being boring as dirt, his candidacy become a reality. Then, because the Democrats chose to rig the primary for a corporate shill who bought them out (Hillary signed an agreement to have the DNC basically as an arm of her candidacy), and she couldn’t even get her nomination to be cheered without hiring people to come into the stadium to cheer. No joke, look that up. Hillary hired actual people to come in and cheer for her at the Democratic National Convention because she was booed constantly, even when Sanders tried to pimp her out.
Because Hillary was an idiot and just assumed that the Rust Belt states would support her and didn’t campaign there, and because she is a corporate tool, she lost the election to Trump. The result? We get a constant stream of interesting stuff. Trump’s Twitter account is comedy gold. I never get enough of it. From the insanely immature spat he has going on with Kim Jong Un, to what a butthurt little bitch he is about every slight, this man is part of what I am assuming will be a string of Clown Town Presidents. Hell, we even got Oprah coming in to throw her hat into the arena. Makes all the liberals who castigated Trump as a reality TV star look really bad when they cheer on Oprah.
Yesterday he got in trouble for a comment where he asked why we would want immigrants from “shithole” countries. Comedy gold. But the thing that got my attention was the media’s reaction. They said that calling these countries shitholes is racist. I definitively disagree. If he called the people of those countries something derogatory, then there’d be an argument. And sure, the xenophobia of his immigrants part doesn’t make him look good. But calling these countries shitholes is not racist. I have nothing against the people of Haiti, Venezuela, and Kyrgyzstan, yet you wouldn’t find me caught dead visiting them. It’s not a race thing to point out that a country is a festering pile of shit. Don’t think this means I support Trump. I just found that reaction interesting.
Next up, we got Internet culture. I’ve been living on the Internet (because I have no life. At all) for some time, and I’ve seen stupid shit that people promote come and go. Most recently, it’s been the various “challenges.” You had the ones that may have been nonsensical but at least did some good, like the Ice Bucket Challenge. My favorite of those videos was Patrick Stewart taking ice from the bucket, putting it in a glass, pouring some scotch, and then writing a check. That’s great. Then there was the Cinnamon Challenge, where idiots tried to eat a spoonful of cinnamon for views. Oh, and let’s not forget the Kyle Jenner contest where idiot girls tried to fatten their lips to insane degrees.
A new player has come to the arena of retarded things that our dumb-shit youth partake in because apparently common sense takes a backseat to Internet views. That’s the world we live in today. I talk of course of the Tide Pod Challenge. A challenge where you ingest the contests of a Tide Pod. People put them on pizzas, in cereal bowls, and then there are the real “winners” who decide to actually eat it. That’s right, there are videos of these fucking moron teenagers putting them in their mouths and eating them. Or at least until the permeable layer melts, then spitting it out because it tastes disgusting. So far these challenges have claimed six lives. I like to think of that as natural selection in action. I know that evolution would gets another shot at giving humanity its just desserts.
I will never understand how people can be this dumb. I may have liked dumb shit when I was a kid, but at no point can I imagine myself having ever been this stupid. Ever. To lack common sense or be willing to put your life in danger for something that ridiculous just makes no fucking sense to me. Maybe one of you can explain this to me. My hope is that ten years down the road, some of these kids get to look back and be like “Oh my Groj, what the fuck was wrong with me?” That is if they don’t try the Run in Traffic Challenge next and die. Just a thought…
Until next time, a quote,
“But let me tell you something, folks – you can’t fix stupid. There’s not a pill you can take, not a class you can go to. Stupid is forever.” – Ron White