This is the Most Ethnocentric Anime Critique Ever (A response to Michelle Villanueva)

I saw this article around, but I told myself that I wasn’t going to go down the rabbit hole here.  That I was just going to brush this off and be like “okay…” to it and that was it.  But when I finally got around to reading this article, I was amazed at the most ethnocentric thing I have read in a VERY long time.  It genuinely blew my mind.  How a person who claims to be part of the “tolerant” culture immediately applies her own ethnic values in judging an entire nation.  This was amazing.  I’m in awe of how stupid this.  The article talks about the supposed link between “anime and fascism.”  Of which there is none.  At first it just goes on about making light of anime it feels falls into this category, before going on a huge tirade attacking Japan and the Japanese for not being the way she wants them to be.  It’s amazing.  Here’s a link to the article, now let’s talk about it.

Before we get too far, know that this article is pretty long, and there is a lot that I don’t wanna talk about, so we’re gonna be jumping around here.  Read that link of you want to get the full context.

Was my reaction petty? Should I have just powered through the series even if the uniforms offended me? Other anime fans were able to watch this without getting upset, so why couldn’t I? Perhaps most importantly, why do a considerable number of anime series have Nazi expys?

Oh boy.  How much do you wanna bet that this is the kind of chick who watches a superhero film with a big scowl on her face thinking about how offensive it is?  Or watches anything, really.  I hope that these “Nazi expys” are pretty good, because you are going to have a REALLY hard time selling me on it.

One of the most popular anime series in recent years, Attack on Titan, takes place within a walled city whose citizens are dominated by a militaristic government. The main character, Eren Jaeger, joins the elite army corps tasked with the destruction of gigantic, ravenous, human-like creatures called Titans. The government controls every aspect of life within the city and spreads propaganda praising the military. Eren, seeking vengeance for losing his mother to the Titans, completely buys into the corps’ “kill ’em all” rhetoric. Attack on Titan takes place in a fascist state.

No, boo.  It takes place in a military state.  Sure, there is propaganda, but that’s partly because they want people being willing to join their military.  The survival of their entire way of life depends on it, and there is a very high probability that people will die.  Like, a lot of people.  Mainly because they have no choice but to be a military state.  Outside the walls are giant monsters that eat people.  That cannot be reasoned with or negotiated with in any capacity.  They will only kill and consume, for reasons unknown.  So the military exists to stop that violence.  Within the context of the series (a thing that SJWs like this hate to no end), it makes sense.  How do you know it’s fascistic?  Are the people being oppressed?  What has informed this in you?

Fullmetal Alchemist, one of the most beloved anime series of all time, is set in Amestris, a vaguely Germany-esque nation with, you guessed it, a militaristic government. To add to the fun, Amestris’ leader is even called Fuhrer Bradley. This connection is made more overt in the Fullmetal Alchemist movie, Conquerer of Shambala, where the plot reveals that Amestris is an alternate reality Germany. Even Hitler makes an appearance, in full-on anime form.

What a way to look at the forest without seeing the trees.  Yeah, it is an oppressive government.  One of the main plot points is that the alchemists who are supposed to serve the state are attack dogs.  Edward joins their ranks as a way to help his brother, but quickly comes to the realization that their nation is not the good guys.  He sees that they are being led by shadow forces to do unspeakably horrible things.  The nation’s evil is being guided by the villains in the series.  That’s what makes it interesting.  Plus, you have character who are working to overcome the bad things the country does to make things better.  Seems like you might have missed that.  Seems like you miss a lot of things.

The long-running series Mobile Suit Gundam, known for constantly reinventing itself since the late 1970s, almost always features an antagonistic sovereign state based on a jingoistic, WWII-era Germany.

Um, oh boy.  There is so much wrong with this statement.  For starters, the Principality of Zeon started as a revolution against the oppressive Earth government.  Spacenoids hated the Earth for controlling them and stealing their resources.  Zeon rose against that.  But it became a warlike group after Zeon was killed and the corrupt Zabi family took over.  That’s what led to the One Year War.  They used the imagery of Nazis, and did horrible things, but Earth was not the victim in this.  They were a part of the problem.  Do you even watch the anime that you’re criticizing?

On the surface, Japan seems to adore its own history. Samurai dramas are perennially popular, but there’s one era which has never really received much attention: WWII. The Ghibli film Grave of the Fireflies does depict the horrors of post-war Tokyo in graphic detail, but Japan still has a tremendously difficult time accepting its role in conflicts from the 1930s and 1940s.

And here we go!  Let the ethnocentrism begin!  You are so uninformed about the culture that you are about to start attacking.  Japan after World War II was a very harsh place.  They did learn their lesson.  It’s why they are only now allowed to start having an official military again, and America is right there to make sure they don’t push too far on that.  It’s why their entire culture had a massive shift after they were so humbled.  Not to mention the fact that the war did such a massive number on the culture.  So many people dead, so much resources lost, not to mention that almost 10% of the entire Japanese population had a meth problem.

Neat historical fact – meth as we understand it today began in Japan.  They used to give it to pilots before missions.  That’s why you had kamikaze work as a strategy.  Those people were tweaking out.  It spread among the populace and like I said, almost 10% of the entire population of Japan had a drug problem at the end of the war.  This idiot’s statement that Japan doesn’t “accept” its role in what happened is asinine.

Japan, unfortunately, is still a very xenophobic nation and it has a difficult time accepting immigrants even if it sorely needs them. The country struggles to maintain a workforce with a dwindling population. More women are focusing on their careers instead of on family, which will eventually result in no new workers to replace the retiring ones. The country needs immigrants, which could cause resentment among Japanese citizens. This conservative, reactionary environment is ripe for creating and supporting media which fears foreigners, supports an all-reaching, totalitarian government, and celebrates the military.

Wow.  This bitch is so close to having a decent point when she just loses it.  Yeah, the Japanese population is dropping precipitously.  A trend that is growing in the rest of the First World, not that she will tell you.  Which is a good thing, by the way.  Overpopulation is killing this planet.  But Japan does have a xenophobic attitude.  This is true.  What will happen next is interesting.

Then she decides to take the actual facts about it and go all Yoda in Episode I with it and make a causal chain to a fascist military state.  What evidence do you have for this?  It wasn’t just fear of immigrants that led to Nazi Germany, after all.  It was the Burning of the Reichstag, the destroyed German economy because the Treaty of Versailles was an egregious document, and a charismatic leader who put the blame on a group of people that historically has been popular to hate – the Jews.  Not justifying that, but from a historical perspective, hating Jews has been pretty common.

Japanese society elevates and praises women who are submissive, delicate, and willing to acquiesce to men in all things. It’s no wonder that some alt-righters gravitate towards “moe” girls as avatars, to depict the sort of girl they want instead of those uppity feminists. Anime girls don’t talk back, after all, and many “moe” characters aren’t shown in relationships unless the show is specifically a romance anime, freeing them for waifu status.

You’re making a political judgment call about an entire nation based on one form of anime.  Never mind the plethora of anime out there with interesting female characters, like Black Lagoon, Baccano, FLCL, Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion, Rahxephon, Darker than Black, Psycho-Pass, I could be here all fucking day.  This is so racist.  How can you make this broad a statement about Japan and the people who live there based on one form of anime?  By the way, what evidence do you have that “moe” anime is connected to the “alt-right”?  Another term that has been used to that point of having no meaning outside of using it.

While acknowledging that lots of anime can appeal to fascists, what can be done to make sure that these shows aren’t idealizing it?

Ah, another SJW who wants all the media that she doesn’t like to fit with what SHE wants.  I’m so glad that we have these people out there.  Not understanding context and feeling that if someone else doesn’t make things the way that they want them, it has to change because it offends them.  Can they just not watch it?  Nope!  They have to get YOU to change it for them.  The entitlement of these people never ceases to amaze.  At least the creator of Steven Universe stuck to their guns and made an SJW show of their own.  I have more respect for them than you, bitch.

Fascism in anime becomes a problem when fans glorify and emulate these clearly evil characters. After all, there are tons of stormtrooper cosplayers among Star Wars fans, but do any of them actually believe that the Empire was right?

We also have another SJW who hates fun.  For fuck’s sake, people aren’t trying to emulate them!  People are just liking the look and getting into the fandom!  Why is that a bad thing?  Yeah, I think that Lord Darcia in Wolf’s Rain is cool, but do I want to find a group of wolves trying to get to Paradise and kill them horribly?  No, I don’t.  Because I recognize that what’s cool in fiction is not cool in reality.  Why are these people so concerned about what other people do with their time?  I just don’t fucking get this.  Let them live their lives, bitch!  It isn’t hurting you at all.

So, is there any need for the ACCA characters to be in those uniforms? No, the uniforms don’t seem to be involved in any plot points. But why have it at all? Why even attempt to evoke it when the imagery might (as it did with me) conjure up negative connotations? It only seemed as if the manga creator just liked the aesthetic, and perhaps, like in those memes, there’s a fun sense of irony in the dissonance between sympathetic characters and SS-esque uniforms.

Again, seeing the forest but missing the trees!  Hell, you even touch on it!  Maybe the person just likes the aesthetic!  Did ya think of that?!  And so what if you don’t like that aesthetic?  They should make a show for your sensibilities?!  Entitled bitch!  Ugh!  This is so dumb!  This is like SJW jingoism, I swear.

I can’t keep up with this.  This woman is so stupid.  It blows my mind how stupid this is.  The fact that SYFY calls this “journalism” blows my mind.

Until next time, a quote,

“Judging all species as if they are one’s own is racist.  A kind of benign anthropomorphism.  All species should be judged individually.” – Legion, Mass Effect 2

Peace out,


Top 20 Favorite Anime

A long time ago, I did a post where I discussed my top 15 favorite anime series.  However, now that it’s been a few years, and I have become more familiar with more series, and have rewatched some of the ones on my list previously, my opinions have changed somewhat.  So now I am going to put out the definitive list.  Here are the top 20 favorite anime that I have.

20. Black Lagoon
What do you get when you combine an 80’s action hero, Studio Madhouse action, and one of the most dark and violent gunplay styles ever made?  You get this series.  Telling the story of a band of mercs for hire – the Lagoon Company.  This series has some of the best dub work of all time.  It has violent shootouts, insane villains, and absolutely zero subtlety.  It’s like someone wanted to bring the 80’s out of its hiding place and put it in the 21st century.  With an amazing cast of characters, all of whom are complete scumbags, you have a series that is morally gray in the extreme, and too much fun to watch.  I miss this style of cinema, but anime is keeping the flame alive.

19. Rahxephon
After the success of Evangelion and what a cultural icon it became, there were a TON of imitators out there.  Most of them never even went past the line of derivative, with people seeing them for the schlock that they are.  However, then you get series like this one.  Which took the formula for Eva and actually went further with it.  In fact, I would say that it perfected it.  A show about aliens who look like us, machines that are golems made of stone, and a focus on music and the power of sound, this was a very grim series that I would argue was better than the series it was riffing on, in more ways than one.  Were it not for the ending which is kind of dull, this show would be able to easily stack up to the more famous predecessor.  But quality animation, a fantastic score, and really good voice acting makes this series shine.

18. Darker Than Black (Season 1)
Another series where the second season just royally fucked the quality, this series was about darkness all around.  In a world where some nameless calamity has stuck the Earth and imprisoned it under a cloud that has stars symbolizing people with special powers, our tale follows a clandestine group who does dirty work for a shady organization who is exploiting those individuals.  Action that keeps you pumped, dark subject matter, and a kind of grotesque nature keeps you guessing.  This series is cold, but for at least the first season you can see where it’s coming from.

17. Digimon Tamers
Given how this franchise had been so light-hearted by comparison, this series in the franchise took a decidedly darker turn.  For a marketing vehicle, this iteration of the franchise was meta, had complicated characters who you like, and took some incredibly dark turns that as a child I was in love with, and as an adult I still can sit down and watch and feel very moved by.  How a show this dark was able to get onto a children’s cartoon block is beyond me, but I am glad that it is, because there is nothing like it.  Whether it is just for the nostalgia, or to just enjoy a children’s show that wasn’t afraid to push the boundaries of what is acceptable, it still holds up to this day.

16. Samurai Champloo
What do you get when you take the creator of one of the greatest anime ever made, add in hip-hop, and enough meta to make Deadpool proud?  You get this series, of course.  A stylistic, badass and overall too fun series about a bunch of travelers, I love this show so much.  It’s not complicated.  This is entirely style over substance.  But that style is just so damn cool!  The creator of Cowboy Bebop comes back to tell a story about three travelers in the Edo Period of Japan, trying to find a Samurai who “smells of sunflowers.”  From the awesome sword-fights to the fantastic voice-work in English, nothing about this series doesn’t stick with me.  Sure, there are some episodes which just die, but overall it is still a ton of fun to watch.  Steve Blum steals the show as Mugen, but the rest are still so cool.  If you can handle some history-twisting, this series is for you.

15. Gundam Wing
I am dying to know when FUNimation is going to re-release this series, now that they have  the Bandai licenses.  Here’s hoping they don’t do a shitty redub of it.  The voicework in this series is classic.  Telling the story of five youths who head down to Earth to get revenge for the murder of a leader of the Colonies, along with strike back at the clandestine Organization of the Zodiac, Gundam Wing is all about big robots and big battles.  But more than that, it looks at ideas about war, the nature of good and evil, and how the changing tides of history can leave people behind.  This series is classic, and while the animation hasn’t aged as well as you’d think, it still is pretty awesome.  I’ll admit that my nostalgia goggles are on pretty tight for this.  It is the first series that I watched as a kid that got me into anime.  But I still love it, and in my opinion it holds up to this day as a gateway series into anime.  Seriously, though, FUNimation, don’t do a redub of this.  It can only suck.

14. Beck: Mongolian Chop Squad
When I watch this series, the whole time I think about what life was like growing up.  But more than that, this series does something that so few stories about growing up does – feels real.  When I see the grungy basements that the band is playing it, I feel like I am there.  I feel like I could watch these shows and hear these instruments.  It tells the story of a young man who is lost growing up, and just so happens to run into the lead guitarist of a band.  From there begins a story of growing up, music, and the hardships that come from knowing that youth is temporary.  Were it not for a totally forced plot later about a mobster which had no reason to be in there, this series would have been nigh-perfect.  But I still feel each string of the instruments when I watch it to this day.

13. Baccano
What do you get when you combine a total lack of chronological order, supernatural powers, and the backdrop of early 1900’s gang warfare?  You get a show that is so damn fun to watch!  This series is a marvel.  It’s a marvel how such an unapologetically violent series can exist but be so fun to watch.  This series is brutal.  You have dismemberment, a gleeful enjoyment of murder, and characters who are pretty much all terrible people but you love all the same due to how deliciously evil they all are.  It tells the story of a train massacre, along with a drug war that goes on because of a substance that grants people immortal life.  Between the phenomenal acting in the dub, and the cool style that it has, this series isn’t about the narrative.  It’s about the crazy ride aboard a train that you can’t look away from for one second.

12. Outlaw Star
Some series are substance over style.  Others are style over substance.  Outlaw Star, on the other hand, is nothing but style and not a lick of substance to be found anywhere.  But dear god is it cool!  Gene Starwind finds himself going from a do any dirty job business owner to a starship captain outlaw who has a mysterious vessel and a mysterious woman who can pilot it in his care.  What this show lacks if any form of substantive elements it makes up in some of the most fun that a series has ever had with its premise.  This is science fiction escapism at its best.  This show knows exactly what it is and doesn’t shy away from it.  Hell, it embraces what it is, and does nothing but have fun with that every step of the way.  If you like all the trimmings of a space adventure story (no joke, they don’t miss a single beat), you need to watch this anime.

11. Vision of Escaflowne
First off, let me say, FUNimation – shame on you for making a redub version of this series.  If you hadn’t have included the original version in the blu-ray, I would be hunting you down.  The redubbed version is just bad, no matter how you scratch it.  A series that also retreads ground that we have seen before, but damn if it isn’t all the execution.  The story of Escaflowne is as predictable as it gets.  You have a girl taken to a mysterious world, who ends up becoming involved in a greater plot that involves fantasy elements in a world with animal people and fighting robots.  Original as my pizza pops idea, but as I said, all in the execution.  This series is incredible to watch!  From the gorgeous visuals, to the fantastic voice-work, it has it all.  Not to mention the soundtrack, which is so damn beautiful.  You know exactly where it will go from beginning to end, but each step of getting there is worth it.  Just wish the ending to the series wasn’t as flat as it is.  I guess they meant for it to go further, but ran out of budget.  Oh well.

10. FLCL
This series is one that I saw when I was much younger, but when I rediscovered it as an adult, it grew on me so much.  The best coming-of-age anime that I have ever seen, this short series tells the story of a young man who is dissatisfied with life, but has his boring days broken when a woman on a vespa with a guitar smashes him over the head and nothing in his life is the same.  While this series does play with elements of eldritch horror and mecha anime, at its core it is about our young hero and his issues with growing up.  He is a lonely kid, and I see so much of my own struggles growing up in him.  Plus, it looks at the problems associated with sex, love, and emotional honesty in a way that feels mature.  The guy who made it studied under the creator of Evangelion, but I would argue that this series does complex emotions better, simply because they capture what it’s like to be a kid better.  If you saw this when you were younger, check it out again and see what you think.

9. Death Note
One of the most widely-known anime series, Death Note tells the story of a man’s rise to power.  Light Yagami is a bored high school genius, who one day happens to come across a notebook dropped from a death god called the Death Note.  He then goes from a soon to be lawyer to little Hitler and he fights to remake the world in his image.  This series has zero subtlety.  None.  But dear god is it fun!  The game of cat-and-mouse between Light and L is too much fun to watch.  Too bad that the entire conflict just dies after that point, up until the very end of the series.  Looking back on it now, I don’t have the same love for this series that I do for others on the list, but it is still an incredible show that has one of the best dramatic arcs to follow.  At least for the first 25 episodes.

8. Wolf’s Rain
This series is probably the most thematically dense of any of the anime on this list.  This is a cold and cryptic series that fuses religious allegory with bitter tragedy.  It tells the story of a young pack of wolves, on their journey to find Paradise, all while the world is slowly descending into chaos and the end of everything is near.  Between the truly incredible visuals, the voice acting that is at the top of its class, and one of the most gripping tragedies ever told, this series will make you cry, think, and question all at the same time.  It isn’t for everyone, as the material is dense and there is virtually no exposition to let you know what is going on.  However, if narrative rich in symbolism and with a lore that you have to pay attention to in order to figure out is your game, then check it out.

7. Gankutsuou: The Count of Monte Cristo
I find it so weird that the most true to the original story version of this series is done in an anime set 3,000 years in the future.  That is just so strange to me.  It follows a young man named Albert, who comes into the acquaintance of a mysterious Count.  What follows is a tangled web of lies, manipulation, and a revenge story that will keep you hooked.  But not only that, it also has a style that is all its own.  This series animation is strange, to say the least.  But that strangeness is what sets it apart.  The style in it fits so perfectly.  This series is almost impossible to analyze, because it is nearly perfect.  Were it not for how bad the last two episodes are, I would almost call it a perfect anime.  Some flaws, but too much fun.  Not to mention having a villain who is just so awesome.

6. Stein’s Gate
When time travel, fate, and the changing of reality collide, you get Stein’s Gate.  Telling the story of a young man and his band of misfits who stumble upon the ability to change time, a young man learns the true price of changing reality, and what it takes to set things right.  So much of what I love about this series centers around the main character.  A lot of people see it as a gripping thriller about time travel, and that is true, but that isn’t what keeps me loving this series the way that I do.  Every single one of these characters all feel like people I could know and love, but as I said, it’s not what keeps me coming back.  The real reason that I love this series the way I do is the character of Okarine.  His anti-social nature and awkwardness in the face of life and the hardships he comes across resonate so much with me.  His fight to be a good friend all while battling his own awkwardness feel so true to me.  Not to mention the fact that he lives in his own head, desperately trying to make sense of it all.  It’s a cold story, but seeing how far he will go to save his best friend hits me right in the heart.

5. Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion
A lot of people have made comparisons between this series and Death Note, and while I do see those, I believe that this is the better series.  Why?  All because of the main character.  The story goes that Lelouch is a disaffected youth living in the occupied nation of Japan.  He has no thoughts about life and is looking to strike back at the Holy Britannian Empire who he blames for ruining his life and crippling his sister.  As fate would have it, he gets his shot when a mysterious woman gives him the power of Geass.  Now it’s a battle of wits to destroy the people he hates, and manipulate the world on his ultimate chess board, that grows bigger and bigger with every battle.  Light is an interesting character, but his corruption is ridiculously immediate.  Lelouch, on the other hand, is one we can watch grow and slowly become turned by his own power.  To the point that he has to make the ultimate sacrifice in order to bring about total peace.

4. Mushi Shi
Anyone who knows me knows that my first love is animation.  I love to watch animation that has quality and a look all its own.  It’s why I love the film Bambi to this day, even if it is cutesy to a sickening degree.  The animation is a step above.  To that end, this series is much the same.  Telling the tales of the wandering Mushi Master Ginko, this series is just so peaceful.  It’s kind of like a lullaby.  I can watch this series anytime that I need to just feel better about my day, and it works wonders.  But dear Groj, the animation!  This series is a visual marvel.  Each episode seems to play around with a different style, and man do I love it for that.

3. Fullmetal Alchemist (Original)
I honestly don’t think much of Brotherhood, so I’ll head that off.  But the original series is a brilliant character study into the Elric Brothers, and their tragic tale of trying to get their bodies back.  This series is nearly a flawless tragedy.  Telling the story of two brothers and how their quest to get their own lives back destroys the lives of countless people around them.  This series is a near-perfect character study.  Edward and his brother are so likeable, which makes the fact that they are doing irreparable harm to the lives of everyone around them that much worse.  This series is also almost perfect, save for the ending.  I am one of the few people who calls bullshit on that ending.  How does sacrificing memory for Al’s life even make sense.  This series would have been a perfect tragedy if it ended with Al giving his life, and Edward realizing that in the end, he has to accept that some things cannot come back, and he has to move forward with his life.  But it is still a transcendent anime that is another perfect gateway series.

2. Avatar: The Last Airbender
How America was able to create an anime this good is beyond me.  This series did something that few anime have done before – transcended the gap between kids show and adult.  This series is incredible.  There isn’t a single bad episode.  There isn’t a single wasted character.  There isn’t a single frame that doesn’t fit in one way or another.  When you learn the insane amount of research that went into this little masterpiece, then you realize that anime can be more than just a niche market.  The story of Aang and his journey to learn the four elements and save the world combines incredible animation, lovable characters, and so much fantastic story-telling in all the best ways.  I honestly can say that this series is perfect.  Right down to the ending, it gets everything right.  For those wondering what I think of its sequel series, then it can be boiled down to this – Season 1 and 3 are amazing, while 2 and 4 go from terrible to boring.

And my favorite anime is…

1. Cowboy Bebop
Everyone and their brother has said about how awesome this series is.  Most people will call me a sheep for loving it the way that I do.  But so be it.  This series is perfect.  From the very beginning where you see Spike going to what is likely his doom in order to escape his life in the mob, the end of the first episode that sets up the tragic nature of the series.  Taking elements from tons of genres and blending them all together, this series cannot be defined by any one genre.  The story of the Bebop and its crew of misfits goes from pensive look at tragic characters, to beautiful elements of action set-piece, all of which are set to the best music that anime has ever or will ever have.  This series is astounding.  People sing its praises, but you know what, it’s earned that.  No series has ever done it like this, and I doubt another series ever will.

So, what are your favorite anime?  Let me know down in the comments.

Until next time, a quote,

“I’m just in a dream that I can’t wake up from.” – Spike Spiegel, Cowboy Bebop

Peace out,


Top 10 Plotholes (in things I like)

So, I have bitched and moaned about all the problems I have with other things, but I thought that I would now do a top 10 post nitpicking the hell out of things I like.  Now, I’m not limiting this to any genre.  These are just the 10 plotholes in things I like that got to me.  There is something from almost every genre in here.  I hope you enjoy.

10. The Caretaker’s Array
Star Trek: Voyager
So, the conflict in the first episode set up the entire series to follow about this vessel and its voyage home.  But here’s the thing – all of this could have been avoided.  I do have a large affinity for this show.  It was a show I grew up with.  But at the same time, I have to point out that there would have been an EASY way to avoid the entire mess.  I mean, how did no one think of this?  Janeway had a choice – use the Caretaker’s Array to go back home, or destroy it and bring an end to the experiments being done.  She chose to destroy it, thus stranding her crew across the galaxy from home.  Getting out of this situation would have been so easy.  All she needed to do was leave a torpedo or two in the place with enough time to get back home and make sure that it wasn’t able to be messed with.  Simple, clean and efficient.  I don’t begrudge the main conflict in this series, as I do like it, but I do recognize that despite how good this series was over all, this plot point was a mute point.  They could have fixed this in 20 minutes and been back home chilling with their people.

9. Wishing for More Wishes Rule
If the Internet is good at one thing, it is finding neat ways around rules.  I mean, for real, this should have been the simplest thing in the world to fix.  They show that Aladdin is a smart guy.  He should have seen that getting around the Genie’s rule was easy.  I get that they wanted to make it so that kids would get a good message about not being greedy, along with making a plot point to keep it from getting insane, but still.  All Aladdin needed to do is to wish for the rule about wishing for more wishes to be gone.  Or to wish that he could make more wishes.  This would be so simple, yet he never does it.  And you never see him try, do you?  Think about it – somebody HAD to have figured this out.  Maybe the Genie was just saying it so that he didn’t end up dealing with a God.

8. The Death Star’s Weakness
Star Wars IV: A New Hope
The thing that blows up the most advanced warship in the entire galaxy, with a weapon powerful enough to destroy a planet, is a small hole that it takes only ONE torpedo to destroy?  The plot problems in this are massive.  For one – why did they need to go down that trench?  Sure, it was an awesome and intense scene to watch, but really – why did they need to?  One can move in any direction in space.  So why not just come down from above and send the torpedo directly in?  Wouldn’t have needed the Force for that.  Also, how did NOBODY in the Empire see that this design flaw existed?  Were the contractors secretly with the Rebellion?  Or how about this – why did they move around the planet Yavin?  For real, if they had turned that gun on the planet, you can bet that the Rebel base would have been blasted to pieces.  Along with everything else on that moon.  The explosion force, along with the billions of metric tons of debris would have destroyed everything on the surface, if not ripping the moon apart as well.  It would have made the battle against the Rebel base so much easier.  I love this movie, but this is a glaring problem that I have to point out.

7. Nobody heard you say “Rosebud”
Citizen Kane
Arguably the greatest film of all time, the central plot point of this film was figuring out what he meant when he said this.  But you see very clearly in the scene where he does say it that not one person was in the room with him.  So how did they find out that he said it?  Did somebody have the room bugged?  Actually, this was before the point where we had the kind of bugs that we have today.  Even before the bugs that Nixon used in Watergate.  So how exactly did anyone know that you had said this?  If it wasn’t for the fact that the ENTIRE film is based on this one word, I wouldn’t take that much issue with it.  But yeah, there is no way that people could have heard it, so a bird or something must have told them.

6. How are you not dead?!
Fight Club
I actually do take issue with this ending, because it is so strange and defies what would have biologically happened.  See, in the book, the narrator realizes that he can’t stop Tyler Durden, because they are one in the same.  So, when he sees how insane his other half’s plans are becoming, he decides to take the only logical path he can – he kills himself.  It potentially saves lives and stops his rampage.  In the film, the narrator puts the gun in his mouth, fires, and…he lives.  You see a giant whole in his other half’s head, but not his.  He sounds a little different, and looks hurt, but he isn’t dead.  He stuck that gun in his mouth, pointing it up at his head.  Given the calibur of the weapon he was firing, it isn’t possible that he wouldn’t have been dead.  Now, I get why this was done – Americans hate unhappy endings.  For real, when was the last tragic film that you saw?  But this ending is totally nuts.  There is no way that he wouldn’t be dead from that gunshot.  If you are going to go around the book’s ending, can we not violate the laws of physics?

5. Memory is equivalent exchange?
Fullmetal Alchemist
I love the first series of this show WAY better than the second series.  Brotherhood was an action show, and that took away from what the original series was – a character study.  Edward and Alphonse tried to bring back their mother.  They got all the physical components needed to make a body, then added some of their blood to get her soul back.  But that wasn’t enough.  Edward lost a leg to the exchange, Alphonse lost his whole body.  Edward then lost his arm making a spirit attachment to bond Al’s soul to a suit of armor.  The focus of the series was the two of them trying to get back what they lost.  While there were supernatural elements to the series, like souls and bonding souls, the series did try to stay grounded in science, for the most part.  When Edward is killed, Alphonse gets up, using the fact that his body is now the Philosopher’s Stone to reach into the gate and get Edward’s soul back, along with fixing his body.  He makes the ultimate sacrifice in order to save his brother.  That would have made for a beautiful and tragic ending.  Edward believed that he was going to be the one to fix things for so long that he lost sight of how far down the rabbit hole he had gone.  If it had ended with him making that sacrifice and Edward now having to move on with his life, that would have been an amazing ending.  Instead, they have this REALLY weird exchange that Edward makes to get his brother back – his brother’s memories for his life and body.  When you get down to it, memory is just chemical processes in the brain.  While the soul is a metaphysical concept, it can’t be argued that your mind controls all of your processes.  So how exactly can one’s memory be used as a currency in equivalent exchange?  It makes no sense.

4. Joel’s cover-story
The Last of Us
So, while I love the scene with Ellie confronting Joel about his story and telling him her own story, I have to think – that cover-story was terrible.  No wonder she didn’t buy it.  It makes no sense.  For one thing – if they just left because she wasn’t needed, why would she have been wearing her hospital gown?  He did seem to be in a rush, wasn’t he?  That’s kind of odd, don’t you think?  What’s more, there would have been a FAR more believable cover for this – bandits.  For real, an army of bandits came and attacked, some infected got involved and Joel had to get her out.  When she asks if anyone else got out, he could have said that he didn’t have time to look back, they just had to keep running.  Simple and believable.  Instead, he tells her that they didn’t need her because they had given up on finding a cure.  Like I said, no wonder she didn’t buy it.  I don’t think any kid would.

3. Will and Lyra not being able to be together
The Amber Spyglass
This plothole amazes me.  In one of the most miserably depressing endings of all time, this book ends with the two heroes, Will and Lyra, having to leave each other to go back to their own worlds.  They can never, ever be together again.  Now, the rational makes sense, in a way.  They can’t live in either one’s world because they would start to decay.  But we saw how that problem was able to be circumvented by a man from Lyra’s world who just periodically returned home to get his home world’s energy reboot.  The other reasoning behind why they couldn’t be together was that all the windows that the two of them made had to be closed.  Spectres were coming through and it was tearing the worlds apart.  But Will had the Subtle Knife.  He made a promise to destroy it once the last window was closed, but why not open a new one to Lyra’s world, close all the others and then break the knife?  For real, this would have been so simple.  I mean, it wasn’t like anyone had a gun to his head about this.  He could have lied to them and then done what he wanted to anyway.  So yeah, this plothole is gaping and easy to solve.  And while I do like a tragic ending, not when it is unnecessarily tragic.

2. The Eagles
Lord of the Rings
Yeah, you all knew this was coming.  This is a plot hole that is so massive that one can almost drive a truck through it.  So much of these movies focuses on the fact that the journey to Mordor is hard and will probably kill them.  But then you have these creatures who are massive and can easily carry passengers.  They could have made this problem end in about five minutes.  And I’ve heard all the explanations before.  There is the “well they couldn’t have gotten close because of the evils of Mordor” excuse.  If you see the scene where they are fighting it out with the Nazgul, they seem to be doing pretty well.  And the dragon-creatures that Sauron has don’t appear to be plentiful.  Then there is the “they are Eagle-gods and don’t want to interfere in the affairs of mortals” excuse.  Yeah, that’s why they have interfered plenty of times before.  So that excuse means nothing.  This is a plothole that I have to expose because as much as I love these movies, it is massive.  There are some awesome YouTube videos that have made fun of this.  My personal favorite was the video from How It Should Have Ended.  So yeah, this is nuts.

And the worst plothole in something I like is –

1. The Mass Effect 3 Ending (Everything from when you get back to Earth)
Mass Effect 3
Where do I begin?  For starters – how did the Citadel get to Earth?  I didn’t know it could move.  And the entire ending of this game came down to three possibilities, each with unimaginable power involved.  But before we get to them – how did the destruction of the Mass Relays not kill everyone?  The extended cut takes away the explanation for that, which is better than it was before.  But for real, each option uses the powers of the Mass Relays to bounce off of.  What’s more, each of these makes the Mass Relays explode.  How did everyone survive?  If they were all trapped in the Sol system, how did the Turians and Quarians survive?
But now we get to the big ones.  The different endings.  First, let’s look at the destruction ending.  Why are you shooting at the tube?  When in the history of any device has shooting it caused it to work?  Why are you walking toward the tube?  It’s clear that it is going to explode.  You can clearly see that it is going to explode.  So why walk toward it?  Then there is the control ending.  How can your ephemeral spirit control the Reapers?  Talk about pseudo-science.  But the worst of all, betraying all laws of logic is the Synthesis ending.  This ending literally is impossible.  There is no possible way that a wave of green light is able to merge all organic and synthetic life.  Plus, if you really think about this ending, you have condemned all of humanity to a nightmarish hell.  Think about it – all the husks are given intelligence and are made partly organic.  Moreso than they already were (another plot hole).  So you are basically turning all the of the synthetic zombies into creatures that can understand how horrific their lot in life is.  You are also turning all organic life into machines.  That ending is literally impossible.
But the worst part about this ending, all the endless plotholes aside is that there is a plothole that everyone missed when talking about how bad this ending is, that came to me – how did you beat Sovereign?  Think about it – if the AI system that controls all Reapers exists on the Citadel, controlling them all from there, how could you have possibly stopped Sovereign in the first game? Better yet – why did they need Sovereign anyway?  Why couldn’t the AI program have opened the Mass Relay into Dark Space?  The plot twist at the end is so bad that it actually invalidates every single thing you did throughout the entire series because it makes everything make no sense.  Not to mention that my mission on Rannoch, reuniting the Geth and Quarians, proved that every single thing that hologram kid said was bullshit.  But you can’t argue with him.  You can’t say that he’s wrong.  Instead, you just have to go with it and nothing you choose matters.
It is telling that I felt so much more closure from the Citadel DLC than I did from the ending of that game.  I spent most of that DLC just shooting the shit with my people and getting to enjoy the bonds that I grew throughout three games.  That is the kind of ending that I wanted.  But everything after I reach Earth is boring.  Nothing I did before matters.  The armies I raised are immaterial.  It means nothing.  It all comes down to three choices that have no real weight because they have no genuine consequences.  What’s more – when I was with Liara through the series, I then see her having gotten with Samara.  Didn’t carry the torch for me long, did you?
I love Mass Effect.  I love that universe.  You made a game series where I could see my choices play out and know that I caused the events to unfold, good or bad.  You made a game series that had me grow relationships and grow bonds of friendship that are beautiful and worth fighting for.  But in the end, not one bit of it mattered.  I get to the final battle on Earth and I just don’t care.  I knew it was bad, but when I saw the true extent of how bad it was, I stopped caring.  My choices didn’t matter and my final actions were meaningless.  So many people say that they accept it because of it being “artistic” and “open to interpretation,” but the truth is that they just can’t do anything now, and are forced to live with it.  With it being all-but-confirmed by this point that this series is going to continue, I can’t force myself to get the next game.  I just don’t have that left in me anymore.  Bioware, you fucked up.  A pity that you couldn’t just admit it.  And future games aren’t going to make this better.  You can only make it worse.

So, what plotholes did you notice in the things that you like?  I’ve already taken myself to task.  Now I think you should too.

Until next time, a quote,

“What people need to realize is that we aren’t nitpicking the problem.  What we’re nitpicking is the fact that we noticed it at all.”  -Doug Walker

Peace out,


Top 15 Anime Series

Now, I’m not talking about the top 15 series ever, just my personal favorites.  I’m not some kind of otaku.  I am a story-seeker.  Wherever I find a good story, I run with it.  And anime has given us some really great stories.  Of course, like with film and books, a lot of what I have seen in junk, but when I do find diamonds in the rough, I am really grateful.  Now, some of the series’ that I have on here are ones that I grew up with, and if I watched them now, I might have a different opinion.  But I doubt it.  I had a pretty good sense of story even when I was younger.  In any case, any of these series’s would be worth checking out.  Hopefully you have!  Enjoy.

15. Outlaw Star
So, there are going to be a few shows on here that are style over substance.  I don’t mind that, so long as the style is cool.  But this series is a little different.  This series has no, and I mean NO, substance at all!  It is entirely style, but for what it is, it is very, very cool.  This is science fiction escapism done right.  The universe is very neat, the characters are all over-the-top, but it is never boring.  The story is almost nothing but vignettes about the adventures of the crew of Outlaw Star, going around the galaxy, trying to find the Galactic Layline.  For real, that is as deep as it gets.  No personal journeys, no great introspection, just kick-ass action and bizarre adventures.  And bless this little show, because it does it just perfectly.  The animation for the series has aged incredibly well, and the universe is all sorts of fun.  Check it out, if you want something that is high on action, low on brains.

14. Digimon Tamers
A series that I saw when I was younger.  I was around 12 when I saw it for the first time.  And man, for a show that was made for kids, I don’t think it is possible for this to have possibly been darker!  For real, for being a kid’s show, there were a LOT of shit-your-pants scary moments in it.  This show dealt with some pretty heavy stuff.  There were the personal insecurities of the characters, which often manifested in the most harsh way possible.  There was the ugliness of what they were doing, deliberately destroying living creatures to make themselves stronger.  Even up to the end, this show never lets up with its subject matter.  And it does so very well.  It is cool when something that is made for kids doesn’t talk down to them.  I think that kids can handle the darker stuff, so long as their is a happy ending.  What makes this series especially interesting, to me at least, is that I don’t actually think it was a happy ending.  It was rather cold, in a lot of ways.  This show isn’t one of my favorites because of great animation or great music, but because of great characters.

13. BECK: Mongolian Chop Squad
I never thought that I would be a big fan of slice-of-life shows.  I mean, why would I want to watch something like real life?  I get to see it enough as-is.  But this show is a total exception to that.  The characters in this show are 100% believable.  This isn’t Disney Channel trying to interpret what being a teenager is like.  This is life experience we can all understand.  I love every minute of this show.  You can feel the strum of the guitar strings as the chords play.  You can smell the dusty basements where the music is playing.  You can identify with the young man as he is trying to find a place that he belongs.  Every single element of this show works, and it works great.  I love it.  I haven’t enjoyed a show like this in a long time.  Now, because it is slice-of-life, this isn’t for everybody.  It doesn’t have a perfectly happy or perfectly unhappy ending.  It is like life – a little good, and a little bad.  And it makes for a masterful show.

12. Baccano!
Whenever people talk about Lost, they make a point about how ridiculously convoluted it all is.  A lot of people have the same thoughts about this series.  To their credit, yeah, this series is REALLY complicated.  It takes more than one run-through to catch everything.  The series tells a whole bunch of stories, all centered around the massacre aboard the train, The Flying Pussyfoot.  This series involves so many characters, so many plot points.  You would think, with how incredibly complicated it is, that it would fall flat on its ass.  But it doesn’t.  This series paces everything so perfectly that even though you may miss some stuff here and there, you will hardly mind.  Every single character, even if you only see them for a scene, plays a part.  You feel like they all have a purpose in the series.  There isn’t a single waste scene, sentence or second of the series.  It is only 13 episodes long, and the creators of the show took advantage of every gory and deliciously odd moment of it.

11. Rahxephon
Man, this is one of those series that is so thematic that one has to sit down and think about it.  There are so many thematic elements at play that it is almost like a study in the subject.  The story tells of a young man named Ayato.  He finds a giant mecha-like golem, and it takes him outside the city of Tokyo, which in this world is its own reality.  It is inside of its own universe.  Outside, Ayato has to do battle with other golems.  Over time, he realizes that reality isn’t as simple as he thought, and that his destiny isn’t as kind as he had hoped.  Everything about this series flows so well.  The music, the visuals, the character growth.  It is very subtle, and very beautiful.  There are a lot of points in this show that don’t make a whole lot of sense, but it is such a pure descent into a fantastical world that you scarcely mind.  It isn’t about the science fiction element, which isn’t the show’s strong point.  This is about questioning reality, and questioning yourself.  What more could one want?

10. Samurai Champloo
Made by the creator of Cowboy Bebop, this series is one of the strangest pieces of historical fiction that I have ever seen.  The benefit of it being completely inaccurate, historically speaking, is that this series knows it.  It is making fun of a whole bunch of time periods and cultures, yet still having not only a cool action story, but also deep characters and some really cool fights.  It is kind of strange how you are having to constantly shift back and forth from not taking this series seriously at all, to finding it almost too serious.  The characters have stories, and like Cowboy Bebop, they all find that by trying to outrun their pasts, they eventually become consumed by them.  This series mixes samurai era with hip-hop style and the same level of good visuals that is to be expected from the creators of Cowboy Bebop.  I will admit that this is a style over substance series, but if that is your gig, you’ll find something to love.  If you don’t take history very seriously, pick it up and enjoy!

9. Gundam Wing
Now, this series has kind of become one of the classic pieces of otaku fanbase, but I am not among them.  Those people creep me out.  I love this series for reasons all my own.  This is a series that gets me because of the story.  The story goes that many years into the future, humanity has started colonizing space.  When a pacifist leader was vying for independence from Earth, the United Earth Sphere Alliance cracked down on them.  Eventually, the colonial leader was assassinated.  Now, many years later, five machines are being sent to Earth, to get revenge.  This series follows the five young pilots in their mission to get revenge.  In the process, they become embroiled in a battle with shifting political sands, different allegiances, and finding that they are not only figuring out the destiny of the stars, but of themselves as well.  The animation for this show wasn’t especially great, but this was more about characters and story.  It has a broad arc, and you never feel bored watching it.  This is a show for a very specific fanbase of sci-fi lovers, but if you are in the mood, and got some popcorn, take a watch.  I think you’ll enjoy it.

Wolf's Rain8. Wolf’s Rain
Alright, I’m just going to level with you – this show is incredible.  Truly, unbelievably incredible.  This anime is probably one of the greatest of all time.  This show is perfect.  Absolutely, utterly perfect.  There is not one thing that was done wrong.  A genuine tragedy about wolves who are searching for paradise, a divorced couple who is caught up in the web of things, a man who has vowed to hunt all wolves to extinction and a noble who has his own nefarious plot, all of which revolves around a young woman called “The Flower Maiden.”  The animation of this series is incredible.  The voice work in English has pretty much every anime all-star voice actor and actress.  It’s an incredible cast.  But the best thing about this show – how smart it is.  This series is an allegory.  The world that it exists in is incredibly complex with a very rich history, however, there is one caveat to that – there is no, and I do mean NO exposition.  All of this history is stuff that you, the audience has to pick up from bits and pieces.  But what makes it better – you don’t have to go through it with a fine-toothed comb to enjoy it.  This series is one that you can enjoy, regardless of if you are aware of the level of depth or not.  If it weren’t for personal preference, this series would be right at the top of this list.  It’s what a great tragedy should be.  It will warm your heart and it will also make you cry.  A lot.  But it is still beautiful.  Take it from me, you won’t be disappointed that you watched it.

7. Gankutsuou: The Count of Monte Cristo
Yeah, I know what you’re thinking – what the hell?  How could an anime about The Count of Monte Cristo possibly be any good?  Well, for a lot of reasons.  The first is that this adaptation, believe it or not, is actually both the most faithful, and the most different adaptation of this story that I have ever seen.  I could go on for hours about that, so I won’t, but it is almost surreal how close to the story it is, even though it is set in a futuristic universe.  But the real selling point for me, aside from the great writing, the great story, and the coldly good acting are the visuals.  This series is a visual mind-fuck.  I don’t think that I have seen anything like it.  Ever.  You can get lost in how they do everything that they possibly can with this series not to make it feel understandable or comfortable.  The use of color, the use of lines, the use of faces and voice, they are all totally bizarre, yet entrancing at the same time.  It’s hard to look away when you are watching, because it is that gorgeous to look at.  But of course, the story is great too, and it is cool to see the story take place from the son of the noble that the Count is trying to get revenge against, rather than from the Count himself.  Like the story, in that regard.  If you’ve never seen the story played out before, I would recommend this version first.

6. Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion
One thing that I love is a story about intrigue and deception.  This series is rife with that.  Code Geass has been compared to Death Note, another series that you’ll see on this list, but to be honest, I think that they are very different shows.  For one thing, their style is 100% different.  Code Geass is a very traditional anime.  I would say that I don’t think that their animation is anything special, but that’s okay, because the story is very engaging and interesting.  It tells the story of a prince who is hiding out from the totalitarian empire of Britannia, who is gradually taking over the world.  Through sheer chance, Lelouch comes into possession of a Geass.  For each person, this power is different.  In Lelouch’s case, it allows him to be able to make anybody follow a command he gives them, so long as he has direct eye-contact with them.  This allows him to begin his efforts to overthrow Britannia, and to get revenge for his mother, who was murdered, and for his sister, who was mutilated at the same time.  This series isn’t has harsh as Death Note, either.  It is definitely an action series, though it does have some good moments where Lelouch’s brilliant mind gets a chance to shine.  This series has a LOT of really harsh moments, and when the characters shine, they shine brilliantly.  Plus, the cat-and-mouse game never lets up.  Overall, a great story, with some badass action.

5.Mushi Shi
Anybody who knows me knows that I am a HUGE fan of animation.  I think that when it is done well, it can bring a story to life in a way that nothing else can.  It can make a world seem more enriched, and it can make characters feel closer.  Honestly, I think there is more that can be done with animation that live action.  And this series is a perfect example.  I like JesuOtaku’s description – that it is a lullaby.  This show truly does feel like a lullaby.  I could go to sleep watching it.  The stories are quiet, very melodic.  You feel very calm, even when this show has incredibly gory and gripping moments.  It tells the story of spirits called Mushi that live with humans, and there is a special magician who can interact with them.  The animation in this series is perfect.  Were it not for the fact that I don’t just judge this by animation alone, this would be right at the top of my list.  Each episode has a new style, a different way of animating.  It never stop being impressive.  I am consistently feeling like I am diving into an unknown world.  Now, there is the fact that this series has absolutely no, and I mean NO, over-arching plot.  Each episode is a vignette.  This is a show for a person who loves animation.  For real, if you want something that will tease your mind, and dazzle your eyes, this is the show to watch.

4. Death Note
Yeah, you knew it was coming.  I LOVE this series.  I truly don’t think that a single element of this series fell flat.  Except for all the episodes after 25.  Yeah…that got pretty bad.  I won’t spoil it for the 5 people who haven’t seen it, but yeah, it got a lot less exciting.  Up until the last episode, which is so incredibly good that you’ll want to watch it again the moment it is done.  But the premise is simple.  Yagami Light is a lot like Lelouch.  He is a brilliant young student who is profoundly dissatisfied with the state of things.  He sees all the prisoners who get out of jail, not having to pay for their crimes of murder or worse.  He wants to do something about this, but can’t.  Then, by sheer chance, he comes upon the Death Note.  This is a notebook.  With it, he can kill any person, however he pleases, so long as he knows their name and face.  Now, Light is using it to kill the world’s criminals, and create a peaceful utopia with him as the new god, under the assumed identity of “Kira.”  Enter the brilliant detective, L.  L wants to catch Kira, and is willing to do anything to accomplish this.  While he has a very strict sense of right and wrong, L will also do absolutely horrible thing to get Kira, making it a good argument over which of them is the actual monster.  The pacing and characters are brilliant, and the animation is amazing.  The use of light and shadows is just great.  The character models and environment animation is also among the best that I have ever seen.  This series never lets up, and the intensity keeps building and building, right to just the right moment, and explodes in a way you never thought possible.  All up to the very, very bitter end.

3. Fullmetal Alchemist
This series only did one thing wrong – the ending.  Other than that, every aspect was perfect.  For real, it is perfect.  The only reason that it isn’t at the top of my list is because of personal preference.  The story goes that Edward and Alphonse Elric use the power of alchemy (taking one substance and changing it into another) to try and resurrect their dead mother.  Their efforts fail, and Edward loses and arm and a leg, Alphonse loses his entire body.  Now, both of them join the military and become State Alchemists, using their position to try and research the all-powerful Philosopher’s Stone, which they hope will be able to create a new body for Alphonse, and new limbs for Edward.  This is an incredibly tragic series.  It is heart-breaking and sad right up until the very end.  The idea of a tragedy show is incredibly difficult, and this series pulls it off perfectly.  From the very start, you are invested in the struggle of these two boys, who have become involved in something far bigger than themselves, and in the process grow up very fast, and very harshly.  There is also an expansive cast of recurring characters, all of whom have a plot and feel like they are a key part of the story.  The voice acting is top-notch.  This series is on par with a great animated film.  Of course, it is also dark, violent, and very horrific at times, so this isn’t a show for the younger crowd.  But I guarantee that if you like a good story, you won’t be able to stop watching.  Not for two seconds.  And if you are wondering what I thought of the reboot series – Brotherhood.  Well, I’m not a fan.  It was rushed, clearly an action show, and on top of that, there were WAY too many people, none of whom was flushed out enough.  But there is the first, and the best.  Enjoy.

2. Avatar: The Last Airbender
I know, why am I putting a kid’s show above Fullmetal Alchemist?  Well, to be honest, this was an incredibly well-done show.  I think that this is like most any of the animated feature films that Disney has done.  It is able to be enjoyed, by both the young and the old.  The story goes that there are four types of elements – Water, Fire, Earth, and Air.  They can be manipulated by “Benders.”  There is one bender, though, above them all – the Avatar.  This person can bend all four kinds, as opposed to only one, which is the way it is for everybody else.  Things were all well and good in this world until the Fire Nation began a campaign to take over the other nations.  Only the Avatar had the power to stop them, and he vanished.  For 100 years.  Now, he has returned.  It is a young Airbender, the last of his kind.  The story picks up from then, when he has returned, on a mission to stop the Fire Nation and restore balance.  It’s a pretty basic plot, but man, it shines in this series.  The characters are all fun and all grow throughout the series.  The bending elements aspect was clearly thought through entirely, as you can clearly say that each style was based on a different form or two of martial arts.  The animation also is great.  It starts out pretty basic, but after a while, it is incredible, outright gorgeous.  The voice-work is top-notch.  All in all, this show may have been made for kids, but it is easily able to be enjoyed by adults.

And my top anime series is –

1. Cowboy Bebop
Don’t accuse me of following trends.  This is one hell of a show.  The premise is that the crew of the Bebop is a bunch of social misfits who are trying to find a way to get by, in a universe that is without law and order.  They work as bounty hunters, ever-working to hunt the elusive paycheck.  Not an easy thing to catch.  But it is the growth of characters in this show that is just amazing.  My favorite is Spike, and not because he is cool or because he can fight.  His outlook on life just marvels me.  He views life as a dream, that he is waiting to wake up from.  All the risks he takes and the tempting of fate that he does is purely so that he can justify his own existence.  Of course, the rest of the cast is great.  So, the characters are great, but what about everything else?  The animation is the best that I have ever seen in any series.  The darkness, the detail at some points, and abstract at others, the noire quality of it, while at the same time the science fiction style, it’s all perfect.  And the music is just great.  Blending western themes with jazzy beats, it is almost a perfect soundtrack, and compliments its universe in the best way.  The reason that this show is so loved is because it is just that good.  I don’t think a single element fell flat.  Except that one episode…Boogie Woogie Feng Shui.  That was the only real time that this show failed.  And it did fail badly, but still.  Overall, this series has perfect music, perfect characters, perfect writing, perfect voice-work, perfect animation.  It is the best that I have ever seen, and I love it to death.

Until next time, a quote,

“Look at my eyes, Faye. One of them is a fake because I lost it in an accident. Since then, I’ve been seeing the past in one eye and the present in the other. So, I thought I could only see patches of reality, never the whole picture. I felt like I was watching a dream I could never wake up from. Before I knew it, the dream was over.”  -Spike Spiegel, Cowboy Bebop

Peace out,


Top 10 Series with Disappointing Endings

Okay, I fully realize how hard it is to really come up with a good story and especially a good series, and find a good way to end it.  I am not going to go on about the series that the endings were a little weak, but acceptable, like The Wire.  That show had a clever allusion in it’s ending that even though we don’t know what will happen to all the main characters, the idea was that everything just goes on, and you have to accept that.  That’s clever.  I’m also not going to get on series that have bittersweet endings, like Cowboy Bebop, because I like those.  I really have no problem with an ending that leaves a little bit of a sadder tone.  This post is about the ending that just showed no respect for what story they were telling, and the fans who enjoyed it.  That said, I hope you enjoy.  I had enjoyed these series, until the end…

10. Neon Genesis Evangelion
Now, I want to clarify that I get why the ending of this show was so bad.  The creators of the series ran out of money, so they cobbled together what they had and tried to create a pseudo-psychological ending that would somehow bring it all to a close.  And it failed, badly.  Not only was it the most boring ending that I have gotten to see, but it also was totally worthless.  Honestly, in this instance, they should have just cut their losses and ended the show where it was, because again, I would have understood.  This was just boring, and a waste of time.  Now there was a movie made later with what they had wanted the series to be, but I would have preferred the series not end, and for the film to then end it for me.  Still, it is low on the list because I get why it happened, I just don’t care for what they did with it.

9. Fullmetal Alchemist
Now, this series ending isn’t bad because of no closure, or even no character development.  It actually almost got everything right.  Edward came to peace with who he was, and who he had become.  Alphonse was ready to give up his life in order to finally do the right thing.  Winry was ready to love Edward.  Colonel Mustang got his revenge and finally stood up for what he believes in.  The Elrics’ father had filled in the rest of the story about the Homogulus and how they were created.  Everything was coming together just perfectly.  I was even actually very impressed when Al sacrificed his life to get Edward back and give him his body back.  I really would have been totally accepting of that ending.  It’s bittersweet, but that was kind of the point of the entire series – that the boys had lost something, but gained something as well.  Instead, they did something that just bugs me with the ending – leave it on a dismal note, deliberately setting up a film sequel.  I hate that so much.  You know, why did Edward end up in our world, anyway?  If they had had him sacrificing his limbs and Al’s memory, but staying in that world, I would have been okay.  Instead, it was just shoe-horning an ending to make room for a film.  Fail…

8. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
This series was an example of something that REALLY gets under my skin – no closure.  There was no closure whatsoever.  Not only that, it didn’t feel like it was over.  Maybe that was Joss Whedon’s idea, showing that the fight never truly ends, but this was the series finale.  We wanted to feel like it was done.  You never find out what happens to any of the characters (save Spike, but that was in the other and much less good show, Angel), you don’t get any new perspective.  It just is like – whelp, that’s over with.  What?!  No, we cared about some of these characters (emphasis on SOME), where do they go after this?  In the end of House M.D., they showed brief clips of what happened to them, and that was fine.  Why couldn’t this show do the same?  A lot of people will claim the follow-up comics did that, or that we could fill in our own plot, but that is just justifying after the fact, and totally worthless.

7. Mass Effect
Angry Joe did a great video about all the problems that were wrong with this ending, which I’ll link to here, but I thought I would add my two-cents.  Like Angry Joe, I hate endings where a new character is introduced at the last second, and I hate endings that also disregared everything that the fans loved about the series.  People invested a lot of time into this series, and what we got for our money was just a complete cop-out in every sense of the word.  Fans of the series were burned by this ending.  Of course, there are some who think that it was okay, but honestly, when the developers told us that there were going to be all sorts of other endings, admit it, you felt like we deserved more for what they gave us.  Three endings, almost all the same.  Complete bulllshit.

6. The Sopranos
The end of this series has kind of become a running gag that will forever be a shame upon HBO.  Remember what I said about no closure, this series embodies that in the worst way possible.  It literally ends with a cut to black, right in mid-sentence.  You find out nothing about the characters, nothing about the family, and nothing about the people who were involved.  Buffy the Vampire Slayer didn’t give us much at the end, but it at least gave us an ending.  What the hell did this series do?  Just decided – okay, I’m done!  That’s another thing that REALLY gets under my skin – when you can tell that an author or creator was tired of the series and wanted it to be over, which was clearly the case with this ending.  What a joke.

5. Heroes
Talk about a series that went from A+ to F- in a second.  This series had a lot of potential, but quickly lost it.  The second season was a bore.  The third had a brief pick-up in effort and respect, but then the fourth ended with something else that totally annoys me – having a HUGE development right at the end and knowing that it will never be addressed.  Claire reveals her super-healing ability, effectively making public the existence of super-heroes.  That is something that could have had an entire show based around it, but instead, it just ends, with the makers of the show knowing that it will never be talked about again.  Ending like that just piss me off, and thankfully are a very rare thing.  Still, a pity that this series snuffed out so fast.  It had a lot of potential.

4. Star Wars
Now, let me make one thing clear – I am not talking about the films in numerical order.  Star Wars Episode VI: The Return of the Jedi is a piece of cinematic mastery.  I am talking about them in production order.  This is actually about all three prequel movies.  These movies sucked, absolutely sucked.  Episode I: The Phantom Menace was pure garbage which completely forgot the previous and far-better trilogy.  The following two films were not only boring, but lacked all of the integrity of the other films.  The acting was beyond awful, the plot was boring, but the worst part is that it COMPLETELY forgot all of the canon established in the original films.  Obi-Wan wasn’t being trained by Yoda in the prequels.  He didn’t meet Anakin as a grown-up pilot in the prequels.  Huge posts have been made burning the reputation of these pieces of garbage to the ground, but they have most certainly earned a place on this list because the final ending was the more overdone and over-dramatic piece of cinema that I have ever seen.  Avoid at all costs!

3. Star Trek Voyager
Of all the series’s on this list that offered NO closure whatsoever, this one is the absolute worst.  We grew up with these characters.  We watched them struggle and fight and many die so that they could get home.  And what happens next?  Nothing.  It just stops.  You never find out what happened to anybody.  Why not?!  Why couldn’t we see Captain Janeway get promoted to Admiral, as you find out she was in the final Next Generation movie?  We wanted to see that, along with Lieutenant Kim getting to command his own ship, or see whatever becomes of Chakotay.  How about Seven of Nine?  Does she end up under the Federation’s microscope?  Does she become a Starfleet officer herself?  Doe she get an outfit that isn’t so ridiculous? (honestly, she looked better in uniform!  Did you see the episode where they had her in a normal Federation uniform?!) There were a million and one questions we wanted to know about what happens to these characters, and not one of them is answered.  It was like the people who made the show forgot why we watched it – to see them get home.  And part of seeing them get home is seeing where the go from there.  Instead, it just shows the ship getting back to Earth, then done.  Bullshit!

2. His Dark Materials
It’s ironic that The Amber Spyglass is one of my favorite books, yet I hate the ending so much.  It made me cry when I read it the first time.  Everything in this series was going right.  Will and Lyra were finally able to admit their love for each other.  They were going to be together.  Miss Coulter and Lord Asriel were dead, and the organization behind them was destroyed.  That was so perfect, and what did we get?  We get the two characters getting torn apart, with no chance of being able to see one-another again, and honestly, that’s all one needs to know!  That is all the bullshit right there.  No, book, you don’t tear apart the main characters and then shoe-in a reason for it.  It is heart-breaking for a kid’s book, and totally out of place, given how well everything was coming together at the end.

But as much as I have problems with all of those endings, as much as I can get annoyed, they are as nothing compared to my #1 pick.  Every time I see this it pisses me off.

1. Animorphs
Remember all the reasons I had for why endings piss me off?  This is an amalgamation of ALL of them.  For a children’s series, this was an amazing one.  The themes were incredibly mature, yet easy for a young audience to grasp.  The characters we all knew and we could understand their struggle.  Right up until the very last book, the conflict was amazing and the character depth was at a fever pitch.  Then the last book came, and spit in the face of everything that the series had done.
The first problem is that it was OBVIOUS that K.A. Applegate was tired of the series.  This book was so rushed that you could see she was just trying to get it out and be done with it.  When you make a series, you have an obligation to the people who have been loyal fans, to not just slack off and give them bullshit in the last act.  And that is exactly what this was.
The second problem is that this was written deliberately to avoid having to talk about one of the key conflicts which we all wanted to see how it would resolve – Rachel.  Rachel was arguably the most dynamic character, going from an adrenaline junkie to almost a sociopath, with a need to kill Yeerks and a definite enjoyment from it, to the detriment of almost all of her inter-personal relationships.  Even her own mother is scared by what she was becoming.  Everybody was eager to see how that situation would resolve itself by the end.  But what did we get?  They just killed her off.  And to make it worse, they then decided to rub our noses in it with The Ellimist Chronicles.  Fuck you!
The third problem is that for the surviving characters, there was no real closure.  You get bits and pieces of a closure, but never anything concrete.  It just kind of happens, and you have to accept it.  Sure, it did address some of the big issues, like Jake’s inner turmoil, and Tobias losing his humanity completely and just becoming a bird, but you NEVER see what happens to Ax.  Sure, you hear it being told to them, but we wanted to see it!  Cassie and Marco are glossed over.  The entire end feels like something that was just rushed out of the gate.
But the final problem, and the worst, is that it has a HUGE development that is never addressed right at the end.  Ax is in danger, and the group flies off to face some kind of unknown super-monster.  Okay.  But that’s it.  They are just flying off to go and fight.  What?!  What the fuck is that?!  We wanted to see an end, god-dammit!  I hate this book.  I hate it so fucking much, yet it is what I have to stomach.  I choose to think that the series had no ending, it’s that bad.  I’ll take the Evangelion route and just accept a complete lack of an ending over this crap.  Worthless piece of shit…

If you are going to make something, you have an obligation to see it through.  I guess that these creators didn’t get the memo, especially K.A. Applegate.

Until next time a quote,

“And were an epitaph to be my story I’d have a short one ready for my own. I would have written of me on my stone: I had a lover’s quarrel with the world.”  -Robert Frost

Peace out,