The Effect “The Shadow Over Innsmouth” Had on Me

When I was a kid, some of my favorite books to read were the Scary Stories series.  The cover designs were captivating.  Some truly amazing artwork.  The fact that the company who produces those books redid the covers because some soccer moms said it’s too scary for their pussy kids pisses me off.  But here’s the thing about those books – despite their scary imagery, one of the things about each of the stories was that it usually wasn’t that scary.  It was just something that wasn’t understood.  And very few of the stories had endings truly as dark as the visuals you had in your mind.  They had happy endings but with the surreal nature being something for the reader to contemplate.  Or to show that sometimes what you fear is just what you don’t understand.

For little kids, that’s actually a really good lesson.  Kids need to know that not everything they’re afraid of is bad.  Sometimes it’s just something they don’t know.  The sense of fear compels kids to know what happens.  They’re short stories where the author has to build suspense quickly, and the best way to do it is with fear of the unknown.

When I got a little older, I got into Stephen King.  But as interesting as some of his books were, I didn’t get into many of them.  It always built to a point when the source of the fear is explained, and that bored me.  That and that guy has a real problem knowing when to end a book.  Too often he just sucks the premise dry to the point that you don’t even care anymore and just want it to be done.  King has admitted several times that he has written himself into a corner more than once.

Then I happened across a little book by an author I had heard of, but never really read – H.P Lovecraft.  The book was called “The Shadow Over Innsmouth.”  It told the story of a narrator who ends up in a small European fishing town, and learns about the secret cult that governs this community.  As he delves further and further into it, he learns a horrifying truth – that the beings that this cult worships are real.  The Deep Ones (or Old Ones, depending) are massive, unknowable, supreme being, ancient in a way that we cannot understand.  The people of this community are trying to cross-breed with them in order to rise to a higher plane of being.  The deeper the narrator gets into this nightmare, the more he is driven to madness because the truth nature of these beings is beyond his comprehension.  It’s beyond anyone’s.  You as a reader are having to realize that you are stuck with this guy, and you can’t tell if his narration is on the level the further it goes.

All of my life, I had questioned religion.  I mean, a story about a wizard in the sky who creates a guy from dirt and then makes a woman from his rib, who gets all pissed because said woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat fruit from a magic tree?  Who wouldn’t be a little bit skeptical of that?  Over 1 billion people in this world, apparently.  Will never get that.  But this book helped solidify what I found the entire concept of a supreme being fucking terrifying.

The Deep Ones are ancient, all-powerful, unknowable, and probably evil, if their motives made sense to us.  But they don’t.  Those who get too close are driven to madness.  Another thing about this is that they see us as less than insignificant.  We mean nothing to them.  That’s because we are nothing to them.  We are ants on this planet, whose petty efforts mean nothing.  As we live and die, they go on.  Generation after generation will perish, but they will remain.  The existence of humanity is just something that happens, and being this ancient, who have seen all the life of this world come and go, is just a small diversion that has no meaning at all.

And in my eyes, that’s what a true God would be.  Why would it care about us?  What would we mean to it?  The Abrahamic faiths wants to believe that this being created us and cares for us.  That makes no sense.  For starters, let’s just get rid of one of the arguments right off the bat.  This universe was not made for us.  We have scientific proof that this universe is billions of years old.  Humanity is just a species that came about after a planet that has existed for billions of years.  All the young-Earth creationists are blithering idiots who have not a single piece of scientific evidence to bolster their claims.  Everything we know about the universe tells us that it is billions of years old.

So why would a supreme being, who has seen countless species that we can’t imagine rise and fall on this lonely speck of dust in this one galaxy, give any amount of a shit about us?  It wouldn’t.  Objectively, there is NO reason why it would.  It’s ridiculous.  If you existed outside of time and space, seeing countless creatures and even countless sentient civilizations come and go, why would you care about this one?  Here’s a fact – it is a mathematic impossibility that this planet is the only one with life.

When I see people who say that they have a hotline to God and that they understand his will, I see two types of people.  The first are shysters like Ray Comfort and Joel Osteen.  They are just as much of an atheist as I am, only concerned about the money.  The second are the lunatics who are using religion to bolster their madness.  Only difference is that their supreme being is nowhere to be seen.  Can you only imagine what kind of madness this world would devolve into if a cult like the one in “Shadow Over Innsmouth” was real and was known to the rest of the world?  It horrifies me.

That books shaped a lot of my beliefs about the world.  Lovecraft had a firm belief that what you couldn’t see or understand was where fear comes from.  When I hear people say they fear God, it strikes me that they choose to believe because they are afraid of displeasing this entity that can destroy them.

As for me, I choose to believe there is nothing.  Because if one day the clouds are ever pulled back and this deity actually reveals itself, that’s when the real nightmare begins.  Just read how that books ends.

Until next time, a quote,

“The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is of the unknown.” – H.P. Lovecraft

Peace out,



The Europa Mystery: Part 9

“Alright, kittens!  Get dressed!  You’re gonna be coming onboard my ship!”  The man with the icy-blue eyes growled.  As I got up, there were looks from some of the men surrounding us.  I felt very naked, in my underwear, with steam still rising from my body.  Lucas was scared to death.  We went over to the lockers.  One of them pinched my ass on the way over!  I was too scared to do anything.  As I got closer to Luc, he just gave me a look.  I could read it – be strong.  We got dressed.  Very carefully, I slipped Angie’s necklace into my pocket.  Having gotten our shoes on, we looked back over at the man with the icy-blue eyes.  This lot, they were very much the pirate look.  Dressed in black, with their attire being dirty.  They were all armed.  A big, imposing lot.  My ocular interface came online.  I was able to get a scan.  They had cybernetic augmentation, and lots of it.  But this wasn’t the kind we got.  This was very underground, messy.  This crew couldn’t have looked more like monsters if they tried.  The augments were all for a purpose.  I’m guessing for what they did as crew.

“Now, move!” the man snarled.  We did as bidden.  They didn’t restrain us.  I guess they figured that we are smart enough to know not to try anything with a bunch of armed cyborgs.  We were escorted out of the shuttle.  It was then we got our first look at the ship this lot belonged to.  It was big.  Not as big as some of the Service’s vessels that I had seen, but reasonably sized.  The shuttle was docked inside, along with several other craft.  While the crew might be rag-tag, their vessel was in good shape.  It wasn’t as squeaky-clean as the one to Atlantis, but it was still kept in working order.
Most of the group broke off from the ones escorting us.  I guess they had jobs to get back to.  We were taken to an elevator and thus began the long ride.  My hands were shaking.  Every second of sitting there was another moment in terror.  I could feel the eyes of a couple of them, peeling off my clothes.  Then there was the Captain of this ship, which I think was a fair guess as to who this fella was.  He wasn’t that way. In fact he actually managed to surprise me.
When the elevator got to the floor it was heading to, we got out.  Walking down the hall, one of the crew slapped my ass.
In a flash, the Captain was on him.  “That’ll be quite enough of that!  I mean to deliver these little birds to the mines on TJ.  I won’t be having you all fucking them up and making them useless.  Got it?!”
The man backed off.  “Yes sir!”
“That goes for the rest of your sorry fucks.  No touching the future prospectors here!  Consider that a standing order.”
So that’s what was going to happen to us.  We were going to be delivered to an asteroid mine.  My guts instantly started turning.  We would be left in the mine, to work until we died.  Again, we were totally and completely fucked.

The two of us ended up in some sort of brig.  The bars were electrified, and I wasn’t about to get electrocuted to death.  Once they left, all the strength inside me left.  I started to bawl.  Heaving sobs that came out, over and over again.  Lucas walked over next to me, putting his arms around me.  We leaned up against the cold steel wall, and I cried into him.  Things had gone from hopeful to now having an utter absence of it.  My heart ached in a way I couldn’t describe.  This was the worst day of my entire life.
“Don’t go losing your head yet, Elle.  We’re not out of this game!”
I looked up at him, angry.  “How?!  How are we not out?!  For real, I am just DYING to know how we are not totally fucked?!  They’re going to deliver us to the mines!  There, I have this strong suspicion that I’m going to be raped and murdered, while you are going to be worked to death.  Did I get that right?!”
His face got more serious.  “For the most part.  But we aren’t done yet!  There is still a chance!  If we give in to despair now, then we really are fucked.  Come on!  We just got out of certain death once.  All we have to do is be smart, and we can do it again!”  There was hope, the real kind, in his eyes.
My heart started to beat again.  I felt life returning to my veins. As I looked up at him, something inside me was pulling me.  I reached up and kissed him.  It was a slow and passionate kiss.  He wasn’t the boy I got on the shuttle with anymore.  He was someone new now.  He returned my embrace, but then stopped, pulling back.  his breathing was heavy.
“I can’t!”
“You’re with someone, last I checked!  And I’m not about to fuck with that!  You’ve just had an emotional moment.  We’re caught up in things.  Remember whose necklace you have in your pocket.”
In that moment, I felt Angie’s necklace, and it hurt again.  What had I done?!  So many emotions, I couldn’t process it all.  Lucas got up, eager to break the moment.  His eyes were moving around.  I could tell that his interface was working.  Mine came on as well.  My subconscious was trying to tell me something – sort all this out later.  We got bigger problems now.  This place was not a fortress.  Indeed, scans shows that it looked a lot better than it was.  The lock on this door was remotely controlled from a console down the way.  That would have been a problem, for someone without my interface.  There were cameras all throughout the cell block.  All I had to do was hack in to one and then go through the network, to find a way to get a solid view of the console.  Then, we’re out of here!  But a thought occurred to me.
“Even if we escape from this cell, we’re still trapped on their ship!”
Lucas winked at me.  “I’ve got an idea about that.  We’re close to a military base in the asteroid field!  I saw the navigation screen before we were taken off the shuttle.  We hack in to their communications array and send a site-to-site transmission to the base, giving them this ship’s location and signature.  These pirates are using a damper to keep their signature from being detected.  We get them past that, then the military will come running!  After that, we just sit in our cell and wait it out!”
That made me feel loads better.  Lucas kept on things.  He didn’t let his fear get to him.  I could learn a lot from that.  Still, time to get to work.  Why wasn’t someone watching this place?  My answer came in the form of some crew member who looked bored, walking through the corridor.  It was clear that his job was to check in us once in a while.  Dude looked miserable.  Oh well, our victory.  I sat on the floor, my eyes on the camera.  It was time to get to work.
Something cool happened – I could see through the camera!  Cyborg power!  It was mounted on a moving pedestal, so I was able to make it turn to the other cameras.  Man was security lax, here.  I guess they only ever had preyed on weak vessels, never anyone who was able to fight back.  Kind of cowardly, if you think about it.  But then, pirates have never been the bravest lot.  Hence their job title.
From camera to camera I went, eventually getting to a vantage point here I could zoom in on the control console and get to work.  Their security was strange.  Really strange.  Maybe I had just gotten used to how things worked back on Atlantis, but here it was all codes and back-up codes.  The codes changed periodically, on the whims of the person in charge.  How did this work?!  If I was in the system, and he changed the codes, then alarms would go off and they would know.  Maybe I could make myself silent.  A fly on the wall.  This was going to take time.  Thankfully, time was in good supply.  I knew that the ship wasn’t moving.  They were probably worried about that signal we were broadcasting.  If anyone else picked it up, then they would come looking.  Couldn’t have that.  The Captain of this ship was a smart man.  A very, very smart man.

Half an hour passed.  Finally, I perfected it!  My greatest hacking device ever.  A little machine that would be able to slip in and out of the system.  Once I understood how it worked, I was able to make my helper just so.  Still, it was tricky.  I would have to chill each time a code change was done.  Each member of the crew had an implant that would let them know the code when it changed.  Anyone in the system who didn’t know it would be immediately flagged.  This was so risky!
Once I was inside the system, it was like navigating a maze.  Why was everything this complicated?!  Who set up this system?!  Each time the system changed, I saw it like a wall of red coming.  I had to stop all actions.  The deeper I got into the system, the harder it got.  My ocular interface showed it like navigating pipes.  Pipes with a ton of different corridors, with plenty going to dead ends.  Had this guy actually anticipated someone coming into the system?  That was interesting.  Each time the guard would pass by Lucas’ and I’s cell, he would tell me to close my eyes.  They were almost glowing.  I pretended to be sleeping against the wall.  Not too hard to believe.  My fetal position was convincing, and those cots were like granite.
Another hour passed.  Damn this system!  I guess the crew knew all the access places well enough to not have problems.  That’s when it hit me – this wasn’t for people inside.  It was for people outside.  If this ship ever got into a fight, this system was designed to eff with a cyber-warfare system.  He didn’t have all the advanced firewalls that the space forces did.  So he made due with keeping the system unbelievably complicated.  This Captain was clever, and now I was too deep in the system to pull back.
Finally, I was in!  Communications.  Now that my program was out of the maze, I didn’t have to worry about the changing codes.  You know, now that I thought about it, I bet he didn’t even change the codes.  I bet an automated system did, every 10 minutes to a few hours, depending on the situation.  Man, the future at work.  I found a subroutine that would let me send a message and go undetected.  A little finesse here, some delicate work there, and it was done!  Just then, I felt a hand on my shoulder.
“People coming!  Get back to the real world!”
Inside the system, I just unplugged.  Being back in the real world was kinda strange.  A little off-putting.  According to Lucas, my eyes had been like red display screens, with text constantly moving.  Crazy, right?!
The two of us look up, and there’s the Captain.  He has an entourage but dismisses them.  Now it’s just him and us.
“So, you two must be pretty scared.”
Neither of us talks.  What’s the point?  We know what’s going to happen to us.  I get the feeling that this guy isn’t about to change his mind.  Why bother trying?
“Tell me a bit about yourselves.  What are two kids doing on a shuttle in the middle of nowhere?  You weren’t coming back from an asteroid.  Given your trajectory, you were long outside of the Belt.  So, where did you come from?”
Another long pause.
“Tell you what, we got a long ride together.  It’s gonna take a lot of convincing to keep these fellas off her.  Most of us haven’t seen a real woman in years.  I have, but then, I can afford the rates on TJ.  They keep going up.”
There was a kind of contained rage in his voice.  A dark, cold, confident power that scared me to death.
“We came from Europa,” Lucas said, finally.
The man gave us a look.  “Europa?  Why?  What’s down there?  It’s nothing but ice.”
“We were part of a science mission,” I said, barely able to make it more than a whisper.
“Well now, that’s interesting.  You lot must have been on that ship that was headed out.  Had itself an escort, for a while.  A little armed.  Enough for us to know not to go after it.  Not worth the effort.  Especially for a ship that clean.  What could have been worth it?”  He took out a cigar, lighting it.  “Now that I think about it, there were a fair amount of shuttles leaving that place too, not too long ago.  They got themselves an escort as well.  Those shuttles appeared to be leaving in a hurry.  Did something happen?”  His eyes never left me.
Lucas sat down next to me.  “You could say that.”
“I see.”  A slow drag, then a long let.  “So, you two some rich kids, with mommy and daddy buying your tickets?  Get to go on some exciting field trip to the other side of the Sol System?”
“Why do you want to know?!”  There was fear in Luc’s voice.
“Well, if you two are worth something, then maybe I won’t drop you off on a mining asteroid.  Maybe I’ll ransom you for a pretty penny.  If it can make me more money, I’m down.”
My mind worked fast.  It had to.  “Yeah, we’re worth a ‘pretty penny.’  My mom’s one of the biggest brokers on Mars.  His dad’s a CEO, worth half a billion.  There was a kind of insurance, for if anything happened to us.  I bet that kidnapping would be covered under ‘happened.'”
With the cigar in his mouth, he smiled.  “Well, then, that’s different!  That means that you might just get to live.  After all, I drop you two on TJ, your little lady-friend is going to get her ass pounded until she can’t sit right.”
A sob escaped me.
“What the fuck do you want from us?!” Lucas snarled.
“To know if there’s a way that I can save you from the mines and her from a bordello where she lives what’s left of her life.  And there might just be.  I’ll have to think on it.  After all, all this, it’s nothing personal.  I just want money.”  The man got up and started to walk away.
The moment the door shut, I broke out in sobs again.  What if the message didn’t reach its destination?!  What if they didn’t come?!  What if we got to this “TJ” place, and I ended up looking like one of those girls on the Colonies of Earth, beaten and bruised, found with a collar and an “owner?”  The thoughts were too terrible.  But what else could I do now?  If I opened the door, we had nowhere to go.  Nowhere at all.  We power up the shuttle, they just grab us again.  There was no way we could outrun this ship.  I couldn’t pilot, and I doubt that auto-pilot would know what to do.  Everything was so fucked.  After all the hope I had gotten when we got off Europa, now I was left thinking that what Mars had told my parents was true.  That I was most likely dead.  After all, if I ended up on “TJ,” would they ever know what happened to me?  I somehow doubted it.  Deep in my heart, a sense of terror was growing that let me understand how desperate my situation was.  All I could do was cry into Lucas.  Part of me wanted to kiss him.  Part of me wanted to kiss Angie.

Part of me wanted to blow my brains out and deny them the satisfaction of getting anything for me.  After all, if this Captain found out the truth – that we weren’t worth anything – then Lucas would have a long and miserable life in a mine, while I died like a common prostitute.  More specifically – as a common prostitute.

Until next time, a quote,

“They dislike me, they like me.  They hated me, and now they love me.”  -Nick Dunne, Gone Girl

Peace out,


Joseph McCarthy and the NSA

One of the most interesting parts of American history was the McCarthy witch hunts for Communists.  It was a dark and insidious time where a demagogue in the Senate was going after innocent people during a time when America was scared.  It was a sad and dark part of our history where everybody was afraid.  They were afraid for their jobs, for their families.  They are always afraid.

One of the biggest things to take away from the era of Joseph McCarthy was that he was treating every American like they were a Communist.  He traded on people’s need to feel safe and their fear of a foreign enemy who was overall faceless and could be anyone.  They could be your neighbor.  They could be your friend at work.  Communists could be anyone.  What a wonderful thing for McCarthy.  The public was as much an accomplice to this insanity as the media, military and every other group of people were.  Anybody who blew the whistle on McCarthy had to fear for their freedom, because he would come after them.  Sound familiar?

We are living in an interesting era.  Americans are very afraid.  There are those like me and me who are not.  We know that this “terrorist” enemy is not some boogieman who is waiting to jump on us in a closet.  Who is not going to hijack every plane and kill us all tomorrow.  We know that this whole insane runaround is nothing but a waste of government’s time and money.  However, the government seems to disagree.

The NSA has grown in power to a level that would make even McCarthy jealous.  They have a tap on every phone, every email, every interaction online.  They have free access to anyone’s entire life and absolutely ZERO oversight that isn’t toothless.  This is deliberate.  Because the American people are now the enemy.  The American people are all terrorists until proven otherwise.  The common argument is that if a person has nothing to hide, they have nothing to fear.  So vapid and insincere that it boggles the mind.  But the people accept it.  After all, their hero, Barack Obama, is for it.  He said himself, “You can’t have 100% security and have 100% privacy.”  Ben Franklin sure would agree, wouldn’t he Barack?

Another thing that is similar is the treatment of people who expose the truth to the American people.  Chelsea Manning exposed the truth, and now she is in a cell for the next 35 years.  Why?  Because it was “putting soldiers at risk.”  They were already at risk, from the wars that Bush II sent them to.  That didn’t change.  What about Edward Snowden?  Who did he put at risk?  There was a rather poignant quote by Snowden about this whole affair that is worth mentioning –

If I am a traitor, who did I betray?  I gave all my information to the American public, to American journalists who are reporting on American issues.  If they see that as treason, I think people really need to consider who they think they’re working for.  The public is supposed to be their boss, not their enemy.

But the public is the government’s enemy.  In their eyes, it’s an enemy who should be tracked everywhere and be monitored in the extreme.  An enemy who they will make sure is aware of its place.  This is the world we live in.

For the age when the government was actually afraid of its people.  For the age when free speech was a championed right and privacy was important.  We now have a government and corporate society who views the people as a threat and is willing to do whatever it takes to keep that threat under control.  We are the enemy.  The war against us has already begun.

Of course, like McCarthy, it isn’t the NSA’s fault.  It isn’t the President’s fault.  It isn’t the fault of corporate America, who is complicit in this rape of freedom.  No, the fault is with us.  After all, it was the people who allowed this to happen.  When we started to accept more and more and more inconveniences in our lives in the name of “protecting our freedom.”  The stupidest line of all time.  Soldiers have died for it and we have become the enemy for it.  Both are horrific injustices.  We did this.

Americans aren’t big on taking responsibility.  We’re finally getting more and more out of Afghanistan.  They said we left there and Iraq, but we didn’t.  We still have forces there.  As we leave Afghanistan, our efforts are being derailed by the forces of the Taliban who still remain.  The nation is plunging back into war.  This isn’t our fault.  It’s not something we could stop.  This is the way it’s been in that part of the world since the days of swords.  With all their technology and money, that part of the world is still very tribal.  War was inevitable.  Our mistake in all of this was getting involved in the first place.  Two nations that did NOTHING to us, we attacked.  So many good soldiers died for that farce.  We let it happen.  We were so scared after 9/11 that we let whatever the government said was good for us happen.  We’re still doing that.

How does it end?  Does it end when we vote?  Probably not.  Everyone in government is bought and paid for.  We have so much broken education and wealth distribution that the idea that voting this problem out will work is almost insane.  Does it end when we revolt?  Probably not.  The police are now militarized in most cities.  They are preparing to have to gun down American citizens.  A revolution would be bloody, violent and short-lived.  Maybe that’s what the people in power want.  After all, so many new jobs would open, once the peasants are a little more dead.  Solve that job crisis problem, eh?  So where does it end?

It probably doesn’t.  McCarthy was opposed by the powerful few who were willing to take a stand.  Thus far, I haven’t seen anyone taking a stand here.  That should scare people, but it doesn’t.

Until next time, a quote,

“Good night, and good luck.”  -Edward R. Murrow

Peace out,


The Wonderful Joy of Religious Insanity about Halloween

Wanna know something ironic?  I hear the same insanity about Halloween from both religious people and atheists.  What?!  How does that work?  Well, let me tell you.  See, when I was a kid, I grew up in the public school system.  Every year, at my school, there was a Halloween carnival.  We would have all sorts of games and what-have-you going on, and one could get some pizza there too.  It was lots of fun.  Along with the complete lack of responsibility, it is something I have missed about being a lot younger.

But at these events, there was something I noticed – some of the people who were my friends didn’t partake.  Their whole families didn’t get involved.  I always thought this was kind of weird.  I talked to them, and I found out something rather interesting – their families didn’t celebrate Halloween.  When I asked them why, you probably can guess some of the answers I got.

The first set of answers was that Halloween is evil.  Even as a kid, I didn’t get that.  And the irony – neither did they.  They gave me the same lines that their parents gave them.  Some said that it was a pagan holiday which celebrated witches (as Christians see them.  Actual followers of Wicca are nothing like that) and thus, God didn’t like it.  That’s funny, because he doesn’t seem to have a problem with a pagan holiday that was stolen which celebrates the birth of his kid (who is also him).

The next set of answers said that this holiday celebrated demons and Satan and it was a holiday of death, and that is why God doesn’t like it.  There is another irony, because every Sunday, he command his children to drink the blood and eat the flesh of a dead guy.  Yeah, that’s not creepy and zombie at all.

So yeah, it was a lot of Christian rhetoric that I we have all heard a thousand times.  It was dumb, pointless, and made no sense to me.  But, I also saw some people who didn’t celebrate it, and these people aren’t the ones I was expecting.  There were several atheist families who also didn’t get in the fun.  This got me to thinking – why not?  It might surprise you that a lot of the answers I got were very close to the ones that Christians gave.

See, many of those that I talked to said that they didn’t celebrate it because it was based on a pagan holiday.  Of course, they tried to justify it better, saying that they didn’t want to indulge ancient superstitions.  That we were supposed to be more evolved, and grown up past that.

Here’s the thing that both the Christians and the atheists who don’t indulge in Halloween don’t get – it isn’t about any of that.  What is Halloween about?  Well, it is about a lot of things.  First, it is about getting to dress up.  When you were a little kid, you played pretend.  You pretended to be somebody else, because it was fun.  Getting to pretend to be your favorite super-hero, or your favorite movie character.  That was a lot of fun, and we all enjoyed it.  But as a grown-up, you can’t do that anymore.  Well, not unless you want to be mocked and ridiculed like those who cosplay or LARP.  But, on Halloween, you are given one night where you can be whoever you want to be.  You can play pretend again, if only to look slutty for some, and ridiculous for others (and don’t get me started with the “It’s not a costume, it’s a culture” bullshit.  If you want my opinion on that, watch this).  But it is a night where you get to have fun, and get to be happy.

Next, it’s about getting to revel in the delight of fear.  I have a feeling that the reason people like scary stories is because it pulls you into the story more.  Think about it – you always wanted to know what the end of the story was, when you were a kid.  You always wanted to know if it was a scary ghost in the house, or if it was just in the imagination of the person’s head.  It made you so much more fascinated.  I remember the Scary Stories books, when I was a kid.  I was scared stiff of them, yet I always wanted to read them.  More and more.  They were loads of fun.  We loved them, my friends and I, and it made every day a new experience.  Now, all grown-up, I still love a good scary story.  I love it when a story doesn’t try and gross me out with gory mess, but instead, plays with me head.  Letting the fear come from a more visceral and psychological place.  We like scary stories, and to be afraid, because it is a catharsis for how relatively easy our lives here in the Western World are.  We have it pretty damn good, but for one night, we can imagine if things weren’t so good.  If they were a little bit evil.  And it is a good feeling.

Oh, and finally, Halloween is about the fucking candy!  I mean, when you were a kid, what did you dress up for?  What did you get in those goofy costumes that your mom and dad thought would look so cute on you and go out around the neighborhood?  You did it because there was the promise of candy delight!  You wanted candy, to make yourself sick the next day.  And you loved every minute of it!  So, these Christians who talk about how this holiday is evil and whatever, they are idiots.  They don’t get what this holiday is about.  And the same for the atheists.  I think, people just need to calm the fuck down about stuff.  For real, have you ever noticed how uptight people are?  It’s like their assholes clench every time they are given a concept that doesn’t mesh with their little view of humanity.

People want the world to fit into a small little box.  Dr. House said it best.  But the problem is that the world doesn’t fit into that box.  The world isn’t as simple as the Christians, Muslims and even the atheists often want it to be.  Life is complicated.  Life is messy.  There are not clear answer to life.  But we have to keep on going, because this is the stuff that matters.

Happy Halloween, everybody.

Until next time, a quote,

“Spoken like a true circle queen. See, skinny, socially privileged white people get to draw this neat little circle. And everyone inside the circle is “normal”. Anyone outside the circle needs to be beaten, broken and reset so that they can be brought into the circle. Failing that, they should be institutionalized. Or even worse – Pitied.”  -Dr. Gregory House, House M.D.

Peace out,


Hell House: the Funniest Documentary I’ve Seen in a Long Time

I am starting to wonder what the reaction to this documentary was supposed to be.  I heard about this from a YouTube vlogger called Dusty Smith, who has the Cult of Dusty YouTube channel.  His review was brief, and it was very fun.  But as for me, I am going to elaborate a bit more, because I thought this was the funniest piece of Christian propaganda that I have ever seen.  For real, if this is what Christians think is scary, then they are dumb beyond any and all reason.  I haven’t laughed this much in a long time.  I hope you will to.

So, the name of this documentary is “Hell House.”  It tells the story of a haunted house, put on by the Trinity Church, in Cedar Hill, Texas.  And man, these people really got a slick business going on.  See, they sell thousands of tickets to this thing, every year.  Now, I should say, up-front, that the makers of this documentary played it straight with this production.  They took no side here.  There is no narration.  They simply captured this event, and then put it out for us to see.  And mock to death, because it’s the stupidest fucking thing ever.  And of course, like most stupid things in America, it had to come from a Christian organization.  See, Trinity Church is a Pentecostal church, so as you can imagine, they take a very hardcore view of the Bible and sin.  And, like most Christian groups in Texas, they want to “put the fear of god in them sinners!”  Good luck doing that here!

Here’s how it works – they take a bunch of kids, usually about 40 at a time, and they take them through various themed rooms, for them to see what the lives of a bunch of sinners is like.  In one room, there is a fat kid, who isn’t doing too well at a test.  He gets picked on and called retarded.  So, he whips out a gun (and I was wishing he would kill all the kids.  Sigh…) and then blows his brains out.  Naturally, since he committed suicide, he goes to Hell.  How many Christians was it said that Amanda Todd’s death was a tragedy?  Bleeding hypocrites.

Then, there is a skit where a redneck guy, who looks like he would be a wife-beater anyway, reads an email that tells him that his wife is cheating on him.  Naturally, this leads to, instead of asking her if this is true, or having a reaction like being sad (because emoting would be WAY too hard for the people doing these skits.  For real, the emotional levels in this are staggeringly and hilariously bad), he decides to up and choke the bitch.  Naturally, when he dies, he goes to Hell.  Snap, how many Christians were commanded by God to murder, and then take the virgin daughters of their victims as their fuck-slaves?  Well, this is Christianity, after all.  Contradiction is nothing new.  They live and breathe on their religion not making a lick of sense.  That’s how the mind of the dumb works.

Another skit has a girl.  She is at this rave, and gets all kinds of fucked-up on drugs.  This guy comes up and just puts something in her drink and then shoves it down her throat.  Yeah, because girls are totally okay with guys just shoving things down their throat, right?  (I swear to non-existent God, I am going to punch the first guy in the vag who makes a joke about cock) But yeah, after shoving the drink down her throat, she is totally miserable, because she got gang-raped by all these guys, and decides that the next logical solution is to kill herself.  Yes, because no woman ever has survived the experience of rape and come out stronger, right?  No, obviously, ladies, if you get raped, you are going to kill yourself.  You won’t be able to live with it.  Lies.  Anyway, she kills herself, so naturally, she goes to Hell.  Yeah, heaven-forbid that God’s Kevorkian actually show a little mercy on her.  No, instead, since to these people, God is a vengeful piece of shit (as per the Old Testament, where he was just that), he decides that she should pay for being emotionally traumatized.  By the way, this girl’s “breakdown” was hysterical.  This acting was so bad, I’ve seen middle school plays that put this shit to shame.  But to her character’s credit, she was hot.

Then, we go to a hospital, where a man is dying of AIDS.  He got AIDS because he’s gay, and in this “haunted house”‘s universe, all gay men have AIDS.  Yeah, because no straight person has ever contracted HIV from being a dumb mother-fucker and not using a condom, right?  Gee, if that were the case, then what is with that massive epidemic of AIDS in Africa?  Are all the men and women there just deciding not to be gay and lesbians for a night and having sex?  Or maybe it has something to do with the lack of contraception, thanks to all the lovely Catholic and other religious groups’ lies.  Gotta love you people!  Anyway, this guy dies, and then, because he’s gay, and according to God, being gay is a sin, he goes to Hell.

But after this skit, there is the most hilariously bad bit of misinformation in this entire place.  There has been a lot of bullshit spewed here, but this was simply amazing.  After the scene with the gay guy’s death, a girl is brought into the hospital.  See, her vag exploded after she took the morning-after pill.  Let me say that again – her VAG exploded because she took the morning-after pill!  According to this haunted house, if you take the morning-after pill, your vagina will explode.  I have a challenge to any Christians stupid enough to buy this – provide me one, ONE, piece of evidence to support this.  This is the stupidest thing ever!  The morning-after pill works by preventing sperm from fertilizing the egg.  It doesn’t make an abortion happen, you stupid Christian zealots!  And the acting of this girl was just awesome.  I really bought how pained she was by this.  After all, it was so accurate, right?  Naturally, she bleeds to death and goes to Hell.

This little train-wreck of a performance then decides to finally take us all to Hell, and show us what horrible tortures these kids are going through.  They have this guy, who looks like an even more emo (and not nearly as cool) version of The Crow.  He talks about how all these people are in Hell for a good reason, and how, if you don’t follow God, and choose to live a sinful (and awesome) life, you will end up there yourself.  And these people spew lots of lines about how what they did wasn’t so bad, like the gay guy is shouting “I was born this way!”  Yeah, very open-minded, eh Christians?

After they make their way through the most boring haunted house in existence (with the worst actors and actresses of all time), they are then taken into this room.  They are all lined up against a wall, unable to leave.  A big guy then comes in and talks to these kids, telling them that if they don’t straighten up, believe in God, and fly right, they are going to follow suit of the people they just say.  They then sit them down and tell them to pray, asking them to join their church and follow Jesus.  According to them, one in five kids do.  Yeah, because that was so scary, right? (Rolls eyes)

This documentary is hilarious.  The acting is awful.  The message is so phoned-in from half a dozen Christian zealots that you see all the time on TV or wherever.  It is an exploitative piece of bullshit that is being used by this church to scare people.  See, that seems to be the new tactic of Christians.  They know that they can’t reason with the atheists, and those who are skeptical.  The reality is that the Christian position has no basis in logic.  None.  The bible is awash with contradiction, illogical and ridiculous bullshit.  There aren’t five words of truth in any of it.  So, instead, they decide that they are going to try and scare kids.  They are going to make them too afraid not too.  I have had plenty of Christians try to do that to me.

But here’s the kicker, Christians – that won’t work for long!  With information being so readily available, there are sources after sources that debunk your complete and utter bullshit, like the Bible.  Here’s the Skeptics Annotated Bible, which goes into great lengths how utterly absurd this book is.

You are losing, Christians, because your lies are so much easier to debunk, and we can show this much easier.  Meanwhile, when you try and fight it out with reason, it was over before it began.  Ha-ha!

Until next time, a quote,

“And they do this, year after year, in state after state, and try to con and scare these people into becoming members of this cult. Just like utter and complete shit-heads would.”  -Dusty Smith, World’s Worst Haunted House – In Under 3 Minutes

Peace out,


Sex and Nudity

Oh yeah, it’s one of those kind of posts.  Those posts that delve into something that makes most people uncomfortable.  Those kinds of posts where you are sitting there after it is done and thinking to yourself – what the fuck do I think about this?  I love these kind of posts.  I love them because they not only get people to think, but they also really look into something that I think is worth getting into.

To anybody who knows me very well, they know that I have a very profound love of sex.  My late fiancee was an amazing woman, and she taught her disciple well that sex was more than just the physical or the mental.  It was philosophical.  She got great philosophical joy from it.  She could ramble about the amazing aspects of the human condition that one found out through sex.  I used to think it was so amazing.  Wait, I still do, even after she is dead.  I have been passing along her lessons to others, like a friend of mine who is discovering her sexuality, and seems eager to learn about it, but smart enough to be smart with her body and how she expresses it.  A pity she isn’t into my type, because she’s a girl after my own heart.  I have a feeling that beneath her uncertainty, she has a vast reservoir of sexual potential and energy.  She’s going to go on and destroy some poor guy.  Wait, not poor.  I envy that bastard to death.

But yeah, I have a profound love of sex, and I have no real problem with nudity.  I have a friend who has been a snuggle-buddy of mine for a long time.  I have seen her naked many times, and it has never bothered me.  I like what I see.  I realize that we cannot be an item, nor friends with benefits (because of this other guy who tells her that he doesn’t want me having fun with her, even though he isn’t her fucking boyfriend…), yet I still have a healthy appreciation for what I see on her.

To that end, there was a guy who I used to hang out with back in high school who I kept wishing would be with me, so that I could see him naked.  I am a greedy son of a bitch after all. ^_^

I have a theory about nudity – I think that it has power over people.  Have you ever noticed that even the people who seem the most averse to nudity always are the way until they actually see somebody naked?  I mean, really, think about this – I knew this girl back in high school.  She used to hang out every day at home, butt-naked.  She was what I call an “at-home nudist.”  So were her parents.  She was raised believing that the body was a temple, and that she was not supposed to be ashamed of her body, but to revel in it.  And so she did.  She loved her body.  Very much so.  There were these two bitch girls who also went to high school.

They wanted to shame this girl, so they decided to come over with their two boyfriends.  The idea was that they would make her feel humiliated when they had their giant ape football player boyfriends hanging off of them.  Turns out, the shoe truly was on the other foot.  Along with not being ashamed of her body, she had a beautiful body, and it was well-maintained, in every facet.  So, when they showed up, the boyfriends ended up staring at her the whole time, and the girlfriends were humiliated.

Next day, they are at school.  They see the girl, now dressed very properly, and I kid you not, they were respectful of her.  They politely said hello to her, asked her how her day was, and seem to be some of the most upstart gentlemen I have ever met.  These are the same guys who not two days earlier said that all girls were sluts.  Now they were treating this girl like she was the queen of the world.  That was a life-changing moment to me.

Camille was also very fond of hanging out at home naked.  Once I got more acquainted with sexuality, I wasn’t freaked out by it anymore.  But seeing these two alpha-male types talking to this girl like she was the Queen of Sheba, it was eye-opening.

Back to the culture at large, I do think that nudity has power.  I mean, nudity has the power to propel somebody into celebrity status.  Paris Hilton did it.  It made Tommy Lee famous for his huge cock.  There is something about seeing people naked that makes us all pause and really not be able to go against them.  Why is that?

I genuinely am interested by this question.  What is it about seeing somebody naked that makes us unable to find a suitable attack against them.  I mean, the mainstream media went to town after the Janet Jackson episode at the Super Bowl, but really, how did that hurt Jackson?  It didn’t.  It didn’t hurt Timberlake’s reputation, either.  Both of them walked away with their reputation intact.  Hell, the internet had respect for Timberlake getting to be near Jackson’s milkshake.

What is it about seeing somebody naked that just stops us from having the ability to mock a person.  I mean, really, who has gone after Scarlett Johansson after the naked pictures of her got released?  Now that butt-naked photos of Kate Middleton, the woman who married the Prince of England…whatever his name is (like we care), what has been the reaction against her?  Nothing.

Of course, it can’t be denied that America has a massive fear of genitals.  Like I said, people in this country all over are totally averse to nudity.  It’s everywhere.  You hear all these Christian groups talking their stupid bullshit about what sluts girls are now.  The aforementioned at-home nudist girl, she got it all the time.  The same two guys I just talked about, they were among those who gave her shit.  But after they saw her naked, nothing.  Now, we must address that she could have been in danger of being raped, and I am very glad she wasn’t, but it can’t be denied that nudity has a power over people.

The same guys who will gay-bash all day will stare at the ass of a man in the shower, his naked body, not out of sexual attraction, but because there is some power that these men have over them for being brave enough to show themselves naked.  Maybe it is because we are so afraid of nudity.  Maybe it is because we are so uncomfortable with any kind of sexuality.  I have no idea what is.  But there is a power that the naked body has over all of us, and it needs to be addressed.  If, for no other reason than to ponder how it works.

As for me, I still love sex, and the nude female form is the most beautiful thing there is.  We need to get over this childish fear of sex and nakedness, because it is fucking awesome!

Until next time, a quote,

“I don’t know the question, but sex is definitely the answer.”  -Woody Allen

Peace out,