Well, it’s that time of year again. The time when we all come together with our families and celebrate what we are thankful for. Right before the day after, of course, where we all go to stores and trample, bite and beat the shit out of other people in order to get deals on over-priced crap. Did you hear about that woman who maced all the people at a store in order to get a scarf? Yeah, that bitch sure did take in what being thankful was all about. But yeah, I decided to think back to what I am thankful for this year.
It has been a really hard semester. I am burning out pretty bad. College has been kicking my ass this semester, and I dropped a course recently, in order to avoid having to fall on the sword for it. So I am NOT thankful for UAA. This place is becoming a lead anchor around my neck. It seems like every time I think that I’m getting ahead, I check Degree Works, and I see how much more I have ahead of me. It is like this place is trying to torture me. I genuinely hate it here. The only good thing I have is something I am thankful for – my friend Maddie.
This girl is one of the oddest, more interesting people I have ever met. She and I have a Friday tradition of going to IHOP. It’s cheap, tasty, and at night, there are actually pretty few people. It’s a breakfast joint, not so much a dinner one. And that is a lot of fun. We are able to be there and have fun. It is a treat at the end of my weeks that has made this semester so much more bearable. Maddie is one of the only friends I have left on campus. The rest have either moved away or graduated. My only regret, and this does genuinely make me feel bad, is that she is moving away at the end of this academic year, and never coming back. She will be heading down to California. I am going to miss her like nothing else.
Another friend I am thankful for is my friend Lizzy. This girl has been there when I have needed her, and her and I are both in the same boat, kind of, with our feelings about UAA. We are both tired of college, and work and classes are burning us out. But every time I am having a bad day, she is there, with something nice to say, or just a hug. This girl is cute as a button. I always want to pick her up and carry her like a cat. Given how tall I am, and how small she is, I could carry her as if she were my kid. I am probably going to have to carry her pretty soon when I go with her to get her wisdom teeth removed. Poor baby. That is never any fun.
Then there is my friend Mandy. Recently, I have had some stuff go down in my life, and she was able to be there for me. She and I haven’t gotten to see much of each other lately. We grew up together, with a cousin of mine, Griffin. We used to be three thick-as-thieves pals, thinking that we would be friends forever. Alas, when Griffin double-crossed me, suing me for over $100,000, that ended the gang rather quickly, and I lost someone I held as a brother. But I have kept with Mandy, and while we aren’t as tight as we used to be, the moment that one of us is in trouble, that bond shows to shine through. I love this girl with all my heart, and I will miss her when she eventually moves away to see what is to become of her. I will miss her terribly. I kind of already do. The days we spent together when we were younger were so nice.
And of course, there are many other friends I am thankful for. Due to the aforementioned stuff that went down, my friend Joyce was able to be there for me. She was a peach about some really delicate stuff, and able to be supportive. I am so grateful. But there is also somebody else. This person and I, I don’t know exactly what went down. I have been killing myself about that for a couple months. Her and I were incredibly close, but then, something happened. I don’t know what. In any case, rather than look at the negative, I will say that this person, for as much as she has issue with me, she did what any great person would do and, when I reached out, wanting her help and her ear in a time of emotional crisis, she was there. She made herself available, and she didn’t have to. I am hoping, almost praying (if I believed in that bullshit) that I can redeem myself, and we can pick up the pieces. She means so much to me, and even if I can’t, I am so thankful that I had her.
Next up, there is my old man. I kind of have taken for granted how lost I would be, in some aspects, without this guy. See, I don’t know shit about taking a car apart, or what goes wrong with one, or any of that. But my car has been having a lot of troubles recently. She has been a real pain, and I am so glad that I have had him around to help me fix things, instead of having to pay out the nose for an over-priced auto repair shop. And of course, Sally (the mother-unit) has been nice too. They are good people, and I am thankful.
The last thing I will say that I am thankful for – I am thankful that I am still here. I battle some pretty hardcore depression. I am almost convinced that it stems from my head injury, because it has been with me ever since. Some days are better than others. I am mentally and emotionally hurting a lot, but I keep at it. I won’t let myself succumb to this, because honestly, I don’t want to lose the few good moments in my life, because those make it all worth it. Plus, I don’t want to make people sad, if I were to go away. I have a lot of hard days. Things get pretty bad. But I am still here. Still fighting the good fight. Still staying strong. And that isn’t going to change anytime soon.
If I didn’t put your name on here, don’t sweat it. There are a lot of people that I am thankful for, so don’t go thinking that I am a hater. I just didn’t think of you on the fly, which is kind of how I am doing this post. I want to get it done before I have to do a shit-ton of stuff today.
So, have a Happy Thanksgiving. Eat the mother-fucking turkey and that mother-fucking pumpkin pie. Enjoy the fuck out of it. It’s fucking awesome!
Until next time, a quote,
“Tomorrow’s Thanksgiving. That’s the day people celebrate with food by eating as much of it as possible. Yes! That’s the day people try to eat every turkey, pumpkin, and cranberry on the face of the earth. It’s a tradition. And you know how I LOVE tradition!” -Garfield, Garfield’s Thanksgiving