I’m all grown up, but I’m not an adult. I don’t want to be an adult. Every day, I hear them talking. Every day, I see them interacting. I work with them at my job at the college. I have been educated by them. I am surrounded by them all the time. It’s part of living, I guess. But the more that I see them, the more that I hear them, the more that I am around them, the less that I want to be one of them. I honestly can’t stand them.
There are a bunch of female-types who work at the desk where I work. I pass by the desk a dozen times a day. You know what I hear about almost every time I pass by? I hear about how much they are annoyed by their boyfriends. How stupid these people are in comparison to the overwhelming brilliance that these girls apparently have. Of course they are. Of course, these women are just the smartest people, and these guys are dumb shits. Apparently, it never occurred to them that if these people’s stupidity is such an annoyance, perhaps they should leave them, and find smarter guys. Ladies, if your guy is an idiot, you have nobody to blame but yourself. Smart a nice guys get tossed aside because of your shallow asses. Don’t get me wrong, guys do shallow shit too, but guess what – you are more vocal about it.
And they are just one example. It’s everywhere. All over the place, I hear about the most boring and inane stuff in existence. There are home loans. There are car loans. There is stuff about what their grandma is doing, or where their parents went on vacation. The stupidest stuff in the history of humanity, yet to adults, this is what makes up a very good conversation. There are pets, there are vacations, there are rooms that were painted recently. Why does anybody care about this? Who could conceivably give a fuck about what color you painted your room? I don’t. But to adults, this is what makes up good things to talk about.
I am starting to think that being a grown-up entails that you immediately start having a very healthy (to them) fixation on family, be very concerned with the everyday banal, have a very deep curiosity into other people’s banal, and not talk about anything that actually matters. And you know what – I hate it. I have ever stupid, simpering, mind-numbing, attention-killing moment of it. For real, every time I hear people talking about their house or their family and what their family did, I want to kick something. Hard.
You know what interests me? Well, lots of things. There is the current social and political climate. That is always interesting. For real, it is. Since I live in America, I am getting to watch yet-another of these big prime-time entertainment spectacles that we call the 2012 Presidential Election. For real, it’s all just entertainment. It doesn’t matter who wins. Nothing is going to change. The military-industrial complex is still going to be fed. Congress will still suck Wall Street’s dick. The growing police state in this country will continue to grow. Nothing is going to change.
Then there is the nerd culture. I am a connoisseur of a good story. Any form it comes in. Books, movies, TV, video games. You name it. A good story is worth everything. But when I talk about my love for video games, you know what I hear more often than I’d like?
“Are you kidding me, video games? Man, grow up.”
Or some variation of that. Like liking a story that is in pixel form and you can interact with is so immature. What they don’t realize is that the gaming world has grown so much from where it was only 10 or 5 years ago. The stories are now getting complicated. There is subtlety and nuance. There are games coming out that have incredibly complex characters. When Roger Ebert said that games could never be art, he couldn’t have known how wrong he is.
There are so many great things to talk about. It is the greatest time to live right now. Sure, there are a LOT of problems in this country. The pointless drug war. The pointless overseas wars. The fact that we don’t have universal health care. All of these are problems. But think about this – the world is connected like never before. The internet has made the entire world come together in a way that our forefathers never could have imagined. Truly, it is the most amazing time to live.
So, there are all sorts of awesome things to talk about, and what do I hear everywhere I go? Inane bullshit. Just people talking about pointless nonsense because…and that’s where I get lost. I don’t have a single clue as to why. Is it because talking about the bigger stuff is tougher? Does talking about the things that matter just irk people in some way? I mean, I have heard about the social contract that says you never talk about religion and politics (a stupid social contract, by the way), but why is it that people can’t talk about anything?
There is a saying that I saw once upon a time -
Big people talk about ideas
Medium people talk about things
Small people talk about other people
And I agree with it. Being a grown-up is boring. I hear them, and I’m bored. Apparently, being immature is when you don’t like talking about houses, car loans, pets, relationship partners or what family are doing. Being immature is when you like to be free to your own expression. When you like things that are not just for adults. When you are able to live a life by your own standards, rather than what society sets for you.
Being a grown-up fucking sucks.
Until next time, a quote,
“I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have been successful for 74 years being able to do that. Don’t rush into adulthood, it isn’t all that much fun.” – Bob Newhart